I feel like I don't know if I'd like to meet this girl again, or even the one I knew. They're both extremely confiding people with extremely troubled lives. They're always trying to please everyone. It's somewhat absorbing for me. I feel like I'm a sad spectacle or something, a projection of what they could be, and I don't like it.

Personally, I feel like I wouldn't like to meet either of them. They're very unstable people, indeed. Their feelings are extremely disproportionate and they're constantly struggling with their surroundings. I feel they're extremely tied down. Frankly, I don't want to know about their lives because I feel like I'll stumble upon a deep, brazenly camouflaged sadness. In this sense, I feel, as I do everyone else, that such a person is very unpleasant, and even more so those around them, who are used to something like that. I feel, in principle, that there will be no organization in the conversations. The focus will be on feeling good, not facing an organized panorama, which will allow for the diversity of emotions and, therefore, the exercise of organizing them to adapt to this encouraging panorama.

These are extremely complex girls, too much for me. In fact, I confess that all their actions leave me thinking because, of course, I visualize them, I identify with them, but nevertheless, it's an overflow for my routine. Furthermore, I'm surprised by the technicality I have to use to express myself about them in a way that is satisfactory to me and, I'm sure, to the reader as well.

Why did I get such complicated girls? I don't understand. Why don't I get something simpler? Also, I'm conscious. I don't want, under any circumstances, to go around advising anyone, which is what I feel I've done with them, regarding maintaining respectful boundaries. In fact, I'm overwhelmed by speaking in this formal way because of the great detail involved. I prefer something much simpler. This, of course, already implies, if we constantly meet with them, a long distance between us, working in the meantime, even though it's impossible, creating a distance between us. Let's be honest: The relationship between these girls and me is a long-term disaster. I can't resort to such complex analysis to understand these circumstances. Indeed, it's essential: I need to distance myself from both of them.

I feel like our relationship is an overload for me. I understand that I need to control my thoughts; however, the effort is precisely what's overwhelming, and if I don't, I run into disorganization with her, which would mean being unavailable and just being another source of conflict. What could be the cure for the issue also results in conflict—a minority one at first, but in the long run, it will be just as impactful as any other source. It's unfortunate, then; I can't do anything more with these girls, and it hurts because I was right there in their shoes.

I find it hard to believe that I can't deal with myself. These are people whose personality I had in the past. Why are these circumstances the same as mine? On the one hand, and on the other, how is it possible that I don't encounter someone in the same circumstances as me? I feel this speaks to the fact that I still have my mentality in such times, even though the conditions of my environment are different, which implies that I haven't fully adapted to it, although it would seem utopian at first, given that it's always in constant change. What I can say is that this within my adaptation continues to be present, and I recognize it. Of the things I've become aware of, many I hadn't been conscious of. Of course, I sought a radical change, which is why I still struggle to achieve my goal. What I can say is that, speaking of a totality, my environment is still creating distance for all situations in the present, everything about them that I haven't been conscious of.

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