Mother-in-law story here but I am the MIL!

At 63, managing life as a bustling single mother and grandmother isn't simple. I live with three of my children, who are 22, 26, and 30 years old, along with my beloved grandson. Life is full but fulfilling in its own unique way. My eldest son and his wife, who live several hours away, visited us last weekend. During their stay, my daughter-in-law took a moment to express her concerns about my household's current situation. She tactfully mentioned her worry about her siblings-in-law not pursuing further education or long-term careers. Her remarks hinted that she found the lack of progress and independence in my adult children disconcerting.

Since their move, the frequency of their visits has lessened, which had puzzled me until now. When asked, my daughter-in-law pointed out the practical issues such as the lack of sleeping space, hinting that the living arrangements were hardly ideal for guests. It's been eight years since she joined our family and our relationship had always been pleasant. However, her recent observations, layered with a certain air of judgment, did catch me off guard. She's a professional nurse and played a significant role in encouraging my son to specialize in IT. Meanwhile, the rest of us have continued with our regular jobs, managing to keep ourselves economically stable.

Her insight into our living dynamics seemed to stir a notion that we were somehow lagging behind ideal societal milestones. This perspective, particularly as they consider starting their own family, seemed to magnify her apprehensions. Challenged by her viewpoint, my response, perhaps sharper than intended, suggested she might have married into the wrong family. This remark apparently wounded her, as my son later pointed out, indicating I had hurt her feelings. While she possibly meant well, her comments pierced me too, suggesting a dissatisfaction with our family dynamics.

On a different note, imagine if this scenario played out on a reality show. The sparks would fly! Reality TV thrives on the tensions that arise from such family dynamics and heartfelt exchanges. Cameras rolling as the confrontation unfolded would likely amplify our reactions for dramatic effect, perhaps encouraging viewers to take sides. The episode would probably conclude with cliff-hanger music, leaving the audience eager to tune in next week and see if family bridges are burned or built stronger.

I feel judged on our living situation, opinions?

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