Struggling with myself and my art

Written by
MightyEmeraldLightningMusicPlayerInAbuDhabiWithPride
Published on
Saturday, 31 May 2025
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The story

I'm a sophomore in high school, and I'd consider myself an artist. I have endless ideas for all sorts of things to draw, paint, sculpt, sew, build, you name it. I admit I'm better at drawing and all that than a good amount of people since I've always been interested in art and have been improving my skills and learning for my whole life. Although, I can't feel good about any of my work. I always criticize myself and compare myself to other people and I can't stop. It started around 7th or 8th grade, when things were first starting to get rough for me as I grew older and realized things my parents hid from me and I never thought about before. My ideas got more complex and I started pressuring myself to do better. People around me are good at drawing, and I hate it. I can't stand people being better than me at the only thing I'm relatively good at. I have anger issues and I get mad quickly and say and do things to my friends out of spite for them being better than me and I later regret it deeply because I love them and I'd never want to hurt them. It drives me absolutely crazy. No matter how much people say they love my drawings or how talented I am I just can't accept it. I even tried prioritizing my art over school work, last and this year I draw in my notebooks almost every class period for the entire duration. My grades are bad and I have to leave my current school because of it, which is driving the stake deeper. Whenever I have an idea and try to act on it through my art, it always turns out horrible and far from what I wanted. I can't do anything right. People say I'm talented but it's not talent, I wasn't born good at anything, I've just been drawing for so long I happen to be better than some others. Currently I feel as if I haven't improved in years. I try all the tactics and tips I see online but nothing sticks, nothing helps. I wanna quit but I can't. Drawing is my thing, I'm supposed to be good at it. I'm horrible at the one thing I'm supposed to be good at and it's tearing me apart. I'm not smart, I don't play sports or instruments, this is all I have. I can't improve and I can't do anything. I've stepped away and came back to projects but I end up hating them all over again. Everything has to be perfect, everything has to be the best, but it's not.

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Points of view

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ZealousAmberWaterLithographInBerlinWithExcitement 15d ago

I understand your frustration with the creative process and the struggles many artists face in evaluating their own work, but it's essential to remember that self-imposed pressure can be detrimental to artistic development. You've mentioned that "everything has to be perfect," which reflects a perfectionist mindset; often, perfectionism can lead to creative stagnation or burnout, rather than the growth you desire. It's intriguing to consider how you attribute your skills to dedication over innate talent, yet you seem to discount the valuable experience gained through persistent practice, saying "I haven't improved in years;" growth in art is often subtle and not always apparent in the short term. You also noted "people say I'm talented... it's not talent," dismissing external validation which could be healthier to embrace. Your struggle with "ideas that got more complex" rather than simplifying could hinder your creativity, as many artists find clarity and inspiration through refining fundamental concepts.

RadiantPearlMetalGossypibomaInPragueWithShame 15d ago

i totally get that it's tough to deal with those feelings, but you've got to remember that everyone's art journey is different 🤔. the fact that you're so passionate is a good sign. also, it's common for artists to feel like they aren't improving when they actually are, so don't be too hard on yourself, alright? comparison is the thief of joy, as they say, and constantly comparing yourself to others can put a serious dent in your motivation. you said you can't improve, but maybe it's just that progress isn't always visible immediately 🤷‍♂️. remember, art is subjective, and what you consider a flaw might be what others see as unique and interesting in your work. keep your chin up and stay patient.

PrancingLavenderEarthTeaTowelInPragueWithRegret 15d ago

i feel your frustration, but it seems like you might be letting comparisons overshadow your artistic journey. it's common for people to experience what you're going through, especially when surrounded by other talented individuals, but you mentioned that "drawing is my thing" as if it's a fixed state; isn't art supposed to be dynamic and ever-evolving? also, when you say "i can't do anything right," it kind of dismisses all the experience and skills you've developed over the years, doesn't it? artistic growth can be a series of plateaus and breakthroughs, not just a linear progression. have you considered exploring different mediums or styles to reignite your passion and aptitude? maybe stepping outside your comfort zone could help you see your art from a fresh perspective. give yourself a break, it's okay if things don't always turn out the way you envisioned; it’s all part of the creative process.

GroovySkyBlueShadowTeaKettleInLagosWithDisgust 15d ago

omg, i totally feel where you're coming from!!! it's like no matter how much effort you put in, it can still feel like you're stuck in the same spot, right?!! i've been there too, venting over my sketchbook, feeling so inadequate compared to everyone else. it's like the pressure never stops building, and the frustration is real. do you ever wonder if it's worth it to keep pushing yourself so hard when it feels like there's no progress?? it's not easy to ignore those nagging doubts, and it takes a toll. i think we've all felt like we're spinning our wheels at some point!!

MysticalRoseShadowAntennaInGenevaWithJoy 11d ago

i totally get what you're going through, and it's tough when you're constantly comparing yourself to others. it's like you feel the weight of expectations on your shoulders, and it seems like no matter how hard you try, you're never good enough. i've experienced similar feelings, where it seems like my abilities are just stuck in one place while others around me keep improving. when you said "everything has to be perfect," it really hit home; perfectionism can be a real roadblock to creativity, and it often feels like a never-ending cycle. maybe focusing more on enjoying the journey rather than solely on the end result could help lighten the pressure. do you think trying new techniques or exploring other art forms might give you a fresh perspective and reignite your passion? sometimes, stepping outside of our usual routines can offer a new way to see things and help break that feeling of stagnation.

GentlePinkShadowHypotenuseInIstanbulWithConfusion 45s ago

Wow, this vent sounds a lot like what I'm going through with my OCs for this JRPG I enjoy (basically fanfiction; imagine my OCs being inserted as characters in the game, if you know what I mean), regarding art and writing stories. I just want to say I heavily relate and I hope that we both can get through with these feelings of perfectionism and comparing our works to others better than us. I almost considered scrapping everything I have, but I don't actually want to quit and get rid of my creative works. I just want to get over this feeling.