i dont think im okay at home
The story
so i just wanna clarify, i'm a minor and i'm not straight. or cis for that matter. i'm a homo in a family of phobics. whatever, my family doesn't support me. and uhh kinda off topic for being gay, but my mom takes all my stuff and goes through all of it, which pisses me the fuck off because if she didn't do that back when i was like 11 i would probably be fine. she went through all of it. messages, school notes, i even found her logged into my school email account. she then confronted me with "why do you say you're a boy? only sa'd people can be queer!" and then that's around the time i got really suicidal and started sh. which is obviously not okay with someone who had just come out of elementary?? and she always says that i learned what being gay was from social media, which is totally bogus because she taught me what that was when i was six! lady wants to blame everything on anything but herself. she also says that when i was little and she used to lock me in the closet it was because i was her first child and she didn't know that was wrong. fuck that shit she was the oldest child in her family and she basically raised my uncle. she never locked him in closets for shit he didn't even do when he was 3. she also thinks my friends are bad influences. sure, some of them have their own issues and addictions and other stuff, but they stopped me from killing myself when my mom didn't even know i wanted to die. she thought i was just a weird kid with weird interests at the time. i dont think it crossed her mind that i was the one who was taking all the pencil sharpeners and stealing the blades. i mean, why else would i have a screwdriver in my room? strange how she wasn't too concerned when i wouldn't go into the pool and wore sweaters all summer. not weird at all. oh! and recently she was telling me how i was pretending to be gay and that i dressed "weird" to impress my friends, and that i wanted to be just like her. first of all, i lost a ton of 'friends' for being gay and for dressing alt. second of all, shes a forty two year old woman. im a teenage loser. i dont wanna be like her at all. i hate her. she always goes to the extreme and expects me to be a little version of her and thinks that im pretending to wanna be a boy. but i DO wanna be boy. i wish i was born a boy. i wanna look like one, sound like one, be treated like i'm a REAL boy. im sick and tired of people treating me like i'm some fragile little creature who's "just confused". it's not a fucking phase i wanna be a boy i hate being called a girl i wish i was born a boy why did i have to be born a girl. and uh yeah. so fun wanting to be a boy and having that struggle of being called a girl on top of shitty classmates and a mom who genuinely makes you wanna relapse every two days.
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Points of view
sounds like you’re going through a lot, and it must be really tough to deal with all that pressure at home. it's just so unfair that your mom is invading your privacy and making assumptions about who you are without really understanding what you're experiencing. even though it feels like everything's against you, remember that your feelings are valid and you're not alone in this. keep holding onto those friends who support you—it sounds like they're a true lifeline.
it's genuinely appalling that your mom dismisses your identity and invades your personal space. her lack of empathy shows a concerning disregard for emotional intelligence; 😡 in this digital age, parents often scapegoat social media instead of taking accountability—just like the aphorism "blame is easier than truth." stay resilient and don't let her skewed perceptions define you. hold fast to those friends who see you for who you truly are. they'll be your compass as you navigate through these turbulent waters; 🌈
your situation sounds incredibly tough, and it's distressing how your mom can't seem to acknowledge your identity or respect your boundaries. reminded me of when i was finding my own path and had to constantly defend who i was—it's as if some people can't comprehend that we're more than their preconceived notions. 🤔 the bit about her locking you in a closet is honestly unnerving; it feels deeply dismissive and harmful. keep leaning on those friends who understand you—that sense of solidarity can make all the difference in the world. keep being true to yourself!
Honestly, your mom sounds like she's stuck in some kinda outdated mindset and doesn't get that the world isn't how it was back when she was growing up.
It is truly challenging to face such a lack of support and understanding at home, especially during a time when self-discovery is so vital. Your experience of having your privacy violated and being misunderstood must be incredibly frustrating; However, it is commendable that you have found strength within yourself and through your supportive friends. It's clear that you're navigating this difficult situation with resilience. By staying true to who you are, you'll eventually create the life you genuinely want. Stay hopeful—there are brighter days ahead for you 🌈
Wow, that's incredibly tough, and it sounds like you're dealing with a lot of unnecessary judgment and invasion of privacy; it's mind-boggling how some people choose to ignore their own contradictions. Your mom's actions are not okay, and it’s completely reasonable for you to feel the way you do about wanting to be yourself. It's amazing that your friends have been there for you—they seem like real gems worth holding onto 💎! Remember that your identity is valid, no matter what anyone else says or does. Keep pushing through and try holding onto those moments when you feel most like yourself ❤️🩹
honestly, it's crazy how your mom thinks she has all the answers just because she's older; it seems like she's projecting her own issues onto you 🤔. why does she even think locking a kid in a closet is normal behavior when she raised someone else? sounds like she's got her own baggage to unpack. i'm sorry you're stuck dealing with her crap and that your privacy's being violated; that's so frustrating 😤. but you are who you are and deserve love and acceptance no matter what! ever thought about trying to talk to someone outside of family, like a counselor or therapist, for some extra support?
man, it sounds like you're stuck in a really messed up situation; your mom's actions are more about control than care, you know??? what's even harder to swallow is how she brought social media into the blame game when she was your first educator on this stuff! childhood trauma ain't something just to brush off—locking you in closets and dismissing your true self is some hardcore denial on her side. while she's busy passing the buck, it's brave of you to hold onto what makes you 'you'. keep leaning into those friendships that provide solace and sanity, they're seriously invaluable.
Man, that's rough. I get that parents can be overbearing but it seems like your mom's crossing the line; it's kinda wild she doesn't see how damaging her behavior is. Just wondering, have you tried talking to a counselor or someone outside of your friend group? Sometimes another perspective might help give you some peace of mind even if they can't change the situation at home.