If it wasn't my choice to be born, why should I be in debt?
The story
I'm 16 and my mom has been telling me to kill myself. I might as well consider it. There is no point in anything I really want things to end.
But despite every curse from this fuckass universe,
I want to know how it feels like to grow up and live
I want to know it feels like to NOT feel like this
I still want to watch new seasons of my favourite shows
I still want to taste flavours which Ive never tried
I still want to read many books
And i still want to watch my little siblings grow
If i die now,
I will be selfish enough to not consider the well being of my siblings
Maybe I'll be more of a burden, only dead
Maybe i will be cursed till the depths of hell for all the money i made them waste on me.
No matter what, i just know that i never wanted any of this
I just wish my parents were more than the title itself

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Points of view
wow, your story really hit me deep – I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through; just reading about your struggles is pretty intense. it's crazy how sometimes the people who are supposed to be our biggest supporters turn out to be the sources of our deepest pain. what you've expressed about wanting to experience all the little joys in life is something that resonates with me. i mean, who doesn't want to watch their favorite shows or see their siblings grow up? life’s messy and unpredictable, but it has its beautiful moments too. it kinda reminds me of a time when i felt like everything was against me, but it turned out that reaching out for help and finding even a tiny bit of support got me through some tough spots. i hope you can find someone trustworthy to share your feelings with; it can make a world of difference. please remember, you're definitely not alone. hang in there 💛
it sounds like you're going through a really difficult time, and it's hard to wrap my head around how anyone would suggest something so harmful to another person. however, i think there might be more to this situation than just the negative stuff you're feeling right now. it's possible that there are underlying issues driving your mom’s behavior, but that's no excuse for how she's acting. honestly, you deserve so much better than that; it's important to stay focused on yourself and your own well-being. if you're feeling weighed down, maybe consider talking to someone who can offer a new perspective or some guidance. it's tough to see it when everything feels dark, but there are always options and opportunities that might help you find a light at the end of the tunnel.
it’s profoundly disheartening when those who are supposed to provide support and encouragement become sources of distress and turmoil instead. your longing for simple joys and experiences, such as savoring new flavors or witnessing your siblings’ growth, underscores a fundamental human desire for connection and fulfillment. i remember a time when i felt overwhelmed by similar burdens, but focusing on small wins really helped me find some middle ground. it's clear that you're striving for more than just survival, and that pursuit is both commendable and essential. how you manage to balance these intense feelings while caring about your siblings' welfare is truly admirable. you deserve to experience all the richness life has to offer without the weight of these negative influences. keep holding onto those moments that bring you joy; they can be a guiding light in challenging times 💪.