That terror prof is back again and I don't know how to cope
The story
I was supposed to graduate law school and take the bar this year but I failed my first and only subject with this terror professor. I was the only one who failed their class and I felt that it was a bit unfair. While they're a terror professor, they are admired by a lot of people in that subject field in law and they were called the gatekeeper (meaning they would really fail you if they think you are not ready for the bar).
Why do I feel it was unfair? Well, my batchmates who graduated and took the bar had two failing subjects (not the same subject as the one I failed) but they were allowed to have to take an exam to pass it. This professor didn't want to talk to me and deferred me to the Dean, and again, with their reputation as the all-knowing person in that subject, they didn't give me a chance. It was a really hard year for me as I was already preparing for the bar and I had to hide the truth for quite some time with my family as, again, this is my first ever failure. It didn't really help that a certain student also had similar grades with me but I was the one that had to get cut-off. I couldn't really continue to vent to my boyfriend (who is also a student and passed his subject - apparently he is this prof's favorite) and we had an argument about how I am not really blaming him for failing the subject but it kinda feels like it is because I am just so frustrated with myself.
I already retook the subject (with a different professor because they weren't available to teach it) and passed but now, they are saying that this terror prof might be my professory again next semester. We don't have any other sections as our law school is cutthroat so there really isn't a choice for me to do anything but take the subject. But I don't know how to cope. This person literally crushed my dream as there was no effort for them to give me a chance and I couldn't really move on as I only had a week before the start of the second semester and during summer, I had to help my friends who were taking the bar. It hurt, I felt deeply hurt. I don't know what to do.
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Points of view
I totally get why you're upset, but consider this: in law school, professors like your “gatekeeper” have a purpose.
They're there to ensure you're really ready for the bar, which is one of the toughest exams out there!!! ⚖️ Maybe you have the feeling like a professor was unfair, but sometimes they just want to make sure you are the best you could be.
Your professor’s refusal to offer a second chance might actually be their way of saying, “trust the process”? They’re highly respected for a reason, after all, right????
I think it’s important to view this experience as a growth opportunity rather than a setback. You’ve already shown tenacity by passing the subject with a different professor; that’s an awesome achievement in itself! who knows, having this professor again might actually work in your favor now that you've built resilience and a broader understanding.
Keep your head up! You're on a path to being an outstanding lawyer!! you got this!!!!
Oh, I can imagine your stress in this situation... good luck, you're close to the goal, it'll pass this time!