Since high school, I've had two best friends that made up our inseparable trio: Alex (M19 and openly gay) and Rachel (F19). We went through a lot together during those years. About a year ago, though, Rachel started dating someone and it felt like she just didn't make as much effort to hang out. Nevertheless, we planned a celebratory group trip to the Dominican Republic for the end of our senior year. Although we were thrilled, it didn't kick off well when Rachel fell ill on the plane, setting the tone for what was to come.

During our stay at the resort, Rachel often complained about minor inconveniences like meal options and early morning excursions, and she preferred turning in early. One night, things escalated when she lashed out at Alex and me, accusing us of leaving her out, desiring the presence of other friends, and criticizing our enthusiasm for taking photos. She particularly directed her frustration at me, throwing around insults that stung. When we did get a moment alone, after she calmed down and Alex was preoccupied, we discussed everything. I explained how her distancing herself after getting a boyfriend made Alex and I closer, as we shared more experiences like graduating together from the same school, working at the same job, and just generally spending more time together.

Thankfully, we've moved past it, and the vacation, albeit with its ups and downs, turned out to be a blast. But now, three months later, Alex and I are planning a European adventure to Barcelona, Rome, and the Amalfi Coast and we haven't told Rachel. Given the dynamics of the previous trip, I'm hesitant to invite her knowing the challenges of longer travels and numerous destinations over 10 days. If she knew we were planning this without her, she'd undoubtedly be upset.

Alex came up with a strategy to avoid hurting her feelings: we pretend that the opportunity arose unexpectedly from a travel agent friend who mentioned a discounted package originally meant for a honeymoon, implying that it's exclusively for two. The plan sounds foolproof as it technically doesn’t accommodate a third person. Yet, part of me wonders if this deceit might actually be worse than just admitting she's a difficult travel partner.

Imagine, what if I were on a reality show? The cameras capturing every whispered strategy, every awkward conversation. How quickly could friendly deceit spiral into a dramatic on-screen fallout? It's one thing to handle these dilemmas privately, but under the watchful gaze of the public, each choice and word becomes part of a narrative we can’t easily control. Would the audience side with Rachel feeling excluded, or understand our need for a smoother holiday? It's a scenario ripe for reality TV drama.

Is it wrong to lie about the travel opportunity to avoid inviting a friend? Should we simply invite her anyway? What would you do?

I'm planning a trip and unsure if I should invite this friend

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