This is the kind of thing where any possible solution proposed leads to a complaint or a reason why it won't work - as far as I know. I don't know how to deal with having trapped myself in an impossible situation. I know I have to just do something I dont want to, but I dont know what thing will make me the least unhappy I guess.

I make 50k and I live in LA so I can't afford my own 1br. I've given up on a house entirely, I just want an apartment. But they START at $1700 and I just cant realistically do that and have a savings account. Some options and issues:

1. Move - i like living here. I like my friends, the racial diversity, the more liberal politics, the weather, and the variety of things to do. Also my job is here and the job market is garbage everywhere.

2. Get a higher paying job - I was trying to. Had 2 3rd round interviews. One company chose someone else because I had a long commute and they didnt want the role to be remote anymore. The other company paused hiring. I've since stopped applying as I'm having some health issues and don't want my insurance paused right now. But it's always scary to start again. What if those interviews were a fluke and I go back to having to endure this market? What if i get laid off again (less likely at current job as they already laid off everyone but me so I'm holding the ship together on my own)? What if i don't like the new role? What if what happened last time happens again and the pay raise can't keep up with rising housing costs?

3. Be self employed - this is what I most want to do. I've started a business and it's slowly growing. Key word is slowly. I'm hoping it'll be a livable wage in 4 years. But how do I manage my feelings of failure and frustration until then? And what if it never gets there?

4. Sales - i hate talking to people

5. Invest - I do. I dont make enough to invest for FIRE anytime in the next few decadss. I've considered day trading but really feel like I'm walking into a get rich quick scheme.

6. Go back to school for x lucrative career - same issues as #2. Also, the job market is TRASH. Do you really think I haven't done a UX boot camp, gotten my PMP, and considered 3 different master's degrees by now? Pivoting only works if it works and right now nothing works.

7. Social media - tried youtube for 10 years. Nothing. Have a tiktok for my business now that has 1k followers. Maybe if it keeps growing I can get on the creator program one of these centuries. For right now, it's a skill I seem to not have.

8. Stop wanting money - well. I'm trying. I just can't shake the feeling that a grown adult working full time should be able to have their own space at SOME POINT.

I'm just so tired of thinking about this. Tired of trying things for a bit or really committing to something and either way coming up empty handed. Tired of the 1000s of job applications. Tired of WAITING to be able to live how I want. It's not just the apartment. I want a garden, to be able to live abroad for a while, to save for early retirement so I dont have to do this crap forever, free time to enjoy my life. I don't even care about a job - i just want money and everything is conspiring against me to keep me from it. It's so discouraging having no options.

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