Dating a stripper
The story
I guess I just need to get this off my chest, and maybe someone here will get what I’m going through, because honestly, I’m kind of spiraling even though I’m trying to stay calm and polite about the whole thing, you know?? I’m 37 years old, been single for what feels like ages, and my family never misses a chance to remind me about it, always these jokes from my siblings, like they think it’s harmless, but it digs a bit deeper every year because I’m trying, I really am, even if they don’t see it!! And suddenly, out of nowhere, someone walks into my life who makes me feel things I thought I left behind in my mid-twenties… and now I’m terrified about messing everything up before it even really starts?? Maybe that sounds silly?? Maybe you’ve been in a similar spot?? I keep asking myself if I’m overthinking or if this is just what happens when life finally throws you something good and you don’t feel prepared for it.
So, the thing is… she’s a stripper. And yes, I already hear some of you sighing or raising an eyebrow or thinking “dude, seriously??” which is exactly the problem, because that’s how my family will react, I’m pretty sure, and it’s driving me crazy before they even know anything. I met her at a friend’s birthday outing, and she wasn’t working then, she was just there, relaxed, laughing, talking like a normal person (because she is a normal person, but I’m embarrassed to admit it took me a minute to see that clearly). We ended up chatting for a long time, and she told me about her job in this kind of open, matter-of-fact way that honestly impressed me!!!! She wasn’t shy or ashamed, she just explained that it pays well, she’s safe, and she’s saving for something better. And all I could think was how confident she sounded, how mature, how honest, while I’m here stressed out because I can’t even handle my family’s dumb comments half the time?? Isn’t that ridiculous?? Sometimes I wonder if I’m the insecure one in this situation and she’s actually the one holding all the maturity.
The more time we’ve spent together, the more I like her… maybe even love her, which feels scary to admit but also kind of hopeful. She’s funny, she listens, she’s patient with my awkwardness, and she seems to genuinely care about who I am, not what I should be by some outdated family standard. I had this moment last week where we were having dinner and she touched my hand in this simple, gentle way, and it just hit me that I haven’t felt that kind of warmth or connection in so long. Do you ever get that sudden wave of “oh wow, this could be something real” and then immediately panic?? Because that’s me… every... single... day!! And then I start worrying again, like what will my brother say, or will my mom look at me with that disappointed half-smile, or will my cousins make their stupid jokes behind my back?? Why am I still scared of these reactions at my age?? I’m 37, for goodness sake, and yet I still worry like I’m some kid trying to hide a bad report card.
But here’s the thing I keep coming back to: maybe this is finally a chance for me to live for myself instead of for what people expect. Maybe dating someone who’s honest, caring, hardworking, and brave enough to choose her own path, no matter what people think, is actually a good influence on me?? I even told her the other day that I was worried about my family judging her, and she smiled and said, “One step at a time… we’ll figure it out when we get there.” And that kind of calm confidence shook me a bit, in a good way!!!! I’ve always been polite, always trying not to upset people, but maybe I’ve been too careful, too scared, too controlled by everyone else’s opinions. Isn’t it strange how we can be grown adults and still be trapped by stuff we should’ve outgrown years ago?? Does that happen to you too??
Anyway, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m hopeful… genuinely hopeful for once. I know there will be awkward talks and judgment and probably some uncomfortable family dinners, but I also know that she makes me feel alive and appreciated and seen. And isn’t that what we’re all looking for?? I’m not ashamed of her, not really, not when I’m honest with myself, just scared of the noise around us. But maybe I can learn to let that go, bit by bit. If you’ve ever gone through something like this, how did you handle it?? Did your family come around?? And if they didn’t, did you still move forward anyway?? I really want to believe that choosing someone who cares about me is the right thing… and maybe, just maybe, this is my chance to finally build something real!!
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Hey, I just wanted to say you’re not crazy for feeling all this. It makes sense. You finally met someone who treats you well, and now your family’s opinions are stressing you out. Anyone would be nervous in that situation. But honestly? It sounds like she’s confident, honest, and really good to you, and that already says a lot. Family can judge things they don’t understand, but that doesn’t automatically mean they’re right. What matters most is how she makes you feel and how you two treat each other. I think it’s okay to take things slowly like she said, ‘one step at a time.’ You don’t have to have all the answers right now. Just communicate openly with her and stay true to what actually makes you happy. In the end, it’s your relationship, not theirs.
Thanks for your words ❤️
it's pretty common to get caught up in what others think, especially when it comes to family. but man, from everything you’ve said, she sounds like a solid person, with her own goals and all that. 🎯 maybe your family will surprise you once they see how happy she makes you! at the end of the day, relationships are about two people: everyone else is just background noise. it’s great that you’re feeling hopeful and wanting to focus on what genuinely brings you joy. keep leaning into that warmth and connection...you never know where it might lead! 😊
hii I get why you're so worried. And it's normal to feel that way!! Specially towards your family since they've been here first. But you have to think about yourself at some point!! If you think she's truly the one if you love and you both respect each other and I think your family should get in the way. Yes they might be angry or disappointed and it's okay, they have all the right to feel that way. But one thing for sure is that they will never stay forever angry. At some point all the bad tensions will disappear and maybe they will finally see the thing you see in her!! Think of her, think of your family but most importantly think of yourself because your opinion and your wishes matter the most.
shouldn't**😅
hey man dont be second guessing yourself if it feels right to you go for it! its rare these days to find something real with someone, but it sounds like two have it. so go for! dont let fear hild you back! your family will either accept it or not but at the end of the day if she makes you happy and you see a future with her then it's worth it. not saying it wont have its ups and down but listen to your heart.
you mentioned her confidence and honesty which seem to resonate deeply with you, highlighting qualities that perhaps inspire self-reflection about your own perspective on relationships. could it be that this relationship is an opportunity to explore a more authentic version of yourself that has been subdued by familial pressures?
dude, this whole narrative seems to lean heavily on your insecurities and obsession with seeking approval from your family!!! i get it, family influences us all, but seriously?? you're 37, not a teenager trying to sneak out past curfew. personally, i think you're giving way too much power to what others might say rather than focusing on the reality of how you actually feel about her... it's like you've already judged the situation before even letting it breathe. honestly, if she brings positivity to your life and makes you a better version of yourself, why waste time worrying about societal norms or familial perceptions?? life's too short for that nonsense. maybe it's time to grow some backbone and prioritize what matters most to YOU!
why are you even worrying about your family's opinions on this?!
You seem like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself trying to predict the future and your family's reactions. Maybe it's worth considering that it’s their problem if they can't see past their biases, not yours; you're entitled to live your life by your own standards, not theirs. It kind of feels like you’re at a crossroads where you can choose happiness for yourself over trying to prove something to others. Embrace it, dude!! you might be surprised how things unfold when you just let them be!
hey, it's completely normal to feel anxious about how your family might react, but think about the broader picture here 😅; this is an opportunity for growth! there's something very empowering about what you described: how she's living life on her terms and prioritizing what matters to her. maybe this is a chance for you to redefine your own boundaries and expectations?? explore what really makes you happy, independent of your family’s views....🌟
Hey, I can see why you’re feeling caught between a rock and a hard place with your family situation. It’s tough when those closest to you might not understand or accept someone who means so much to you; sounds like she really brings out the best in you. Maybe this is a chance to show them that you're serious about what makes *you* happy and confident, no matter the job title. Keep focusing on how well she treats you and how you feel around her: sometimes showing others how fulfilled you are makes them reconsider their judgments.
maybe it's worth questioning why your family's approval holds such significant weight in your life. you're worried about their reactions, but isn’t the most crucial thing how you feel about this relationship? if she genuinely makes you happy and there's a connection, then maybe that's more valuable than any outdated judgments. have you considered sitting down with them to express how important it is for you to pursue what truly brings happiness into your life??
you've got a lot going on in your head, but stepping back and truly assessing the situation might offer clarity. while family opinions can weigh heavy, it seems like they’re not actually living your life, you are. maybe focus more on the mutual respect and understanding you share with her rather than the hypothetical judgments from others? it could be really liberating to embrace this relationship for what it brings to your life rather than worrying about external views too much. 😐
honestly, dude, it feels like you're letting your family’s opinions hold you back way too much?? i get that family can be a huge influence but come on!!!! if she makes you happy, that's what counts. why let outdated perspectives dictate your life?! maybe this situation is a wake-up call for you to start challenging those ingrained expectations and stop living in fear of judgment... ever thought that by accepting yourself fully, regardless of others' opinions, you'll actually grow more confident??? honestly, flipping the script here could do wonders for how you see relationships and help break those chains of insecurity. life's short, man; don’t let other people’s hang-ups keep you from something real! ✌️
sounds like you're in a tough spot, but maybe it’s more about finding balance between valuing your relationship and dealing with your family's views. your partner seems to have a strong sense of self and understanding; taking cues from her might help you stand firm in what you want. it's not easy breaking away from family expectations, but focusing on what fulfills you could lead to a happier life. keep centering yourself on the positive vibes she brings and try not to let outside noise dictate your path.
Hey man, what you're going through sounds tough, but sometimes the heart wants what it wants and you gotta just trust yourself!
yo, i totally feel ya on this one 🤔; it's like you're finally finding someone who gets you and you're hesitating cuz of what others might think.
Sounds like you’re wrestling with some heavy expectations, but maybe the key here is focusing on your personal journey?
Go dude!!!
ever thought about why your family’s judgments hold so much power over you at 37?
Man, it sounds like you're really going through it; I'm sorry you've got all this stress hanging over you...
hey, i get where you're coming from, but maybe you’re putting too much weight on family reactions; 🧐 honestly, it feels like you’re psyching yourself out more than necessary. sure, they might have opinions but it's your life at the end of the day! being with someone who's real about who they are is kinda rare and worth exploring. plus, her job doesn’t define her whole personality or what she brings to the table in a relationship; focusing on how she makes you feel might be more important than stressing over what others think 🤔's like you're facing a classic identity vs. expectation battle here: guess it’s down to whether you’ll let their noise drown out your truth? 'cause maybe once you decide not to care so much about their judgments, you'll find peace in going after what truly makes you happy. 😌
Dude, if she’s bringing out this new side of you that feels authentic and inspired, maybe it’s time to question just how much sway those family opinions should really have; sometimes the path to happiness is paved by embracing who makes you feel alive regardless of the noise around you.