forgive but never forget
The story
I ain't one to air my laundry, but sometimes it's freeing to just lay it all out there. life throws curveballs, and boy, did i get hit by one. my husband, bless his heart, decided to test our vows a couple years ago. cheated on me, he did. now, i ain't saying i'm perfect, but that knock knocked the wind out of me. i'm 47, been around the block, and you'd think i'd seen it all, but nothing prepares you for your partner's betrayal. it ain't easy, letting go of that kind of hurt. easy living is what i wanted, but life had other plans. by the way, how long does it really take to forgive? learned from a wise soul that, "forgiveness ain't about forgetting, but about letting go of the hold that pain has over you." and ain't that the truth? let me tell you, releasing that grip ain't a one-and-done deal.
from that day, things changed. our house felt different, like the walls knew secrets they shouldn't. "once trust is gone, it's hard to earn it back." a cliché, sure, but reality is cliches exist for a reason. tried therapy, tried talking, tried understanding the why's and how's. maybe i could've seen it coming, maybe not. questions like a spinning wheel in my head, asking, did i do enough? was i overlooking the signs? but hey, blaming myself ain't gonna fix a thing. i've learned not to carry that burden. laid it on him, rightly so. he messed up, not me. relationships are tricky business, and cautionary tales abound. but man, it hurts to be the one people wag their tongues about, even if no names are named. staying put, that's my choice, 'cause the heart and mind have minds of their own. ever been in such a dilemma yourself? if so, you'll know it's a matter of picking the pieces, even when some might be missing.
'm figuring out the whole forgive but never forget thing. my puzzle's still got gaps, and that's okay. life's not about having it all figured out, is it? daily, i remind myself of the good times, but the shadows linger. ain't saying i'm a saint, but i'm being kind to myself. "to err is human; to forgive is divine," or so they say. not divine, just human, with all the flaws and sorrows that come with it. hesitations and doubts live rent-free in my head, but that's part of the package deal called moving on. we ain't perfect, not you, not me, not my husband. but i feel you gotta let people learn from mistakes, right? and if second chances are a deal-breaker for some, who am i to judge? life's too short to hold grudges, but it sure as hell ain't too short to forget. what about you? where do you draw the line between forgiving and forgetting?
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Points of view
sounds tough, but sounds like you're painting things too rosy; life ain't always about forgiving and moving on!!! betrayal's a big deal, not just some bump in the road. ignoring it ain't healthy; tried that myself, and it didn't work. why stick around with all that emotional baggage??! in the real world, everyone's got breaking points. is this mess really something you want to keep dealing with??? 🤔
I hear you, but I ain't sure sticking around is always the best call. Trust, once shattered, is a tough thing to rebuild, ya know? I get that love ain't simple and that sometimes we cling to it, hoping it'll turn out alright; "forgive and forget" is easier said than done. My friend went through something similar, tried to make it work but just ended up more hurt. You gotta ask yourself if it's worth the constant doubt and whatnot. If holding on is just dragging you down, is it really worth it?
sounds like you're stuck in a loop, trying to mend what's badly broken; betrayal is no trivial matter, you know? it's not just about glossing over pain and pretending everything is fine. trust me, been there, done that – it only prolongs the agony. you're not doing yourself any favors by hanging on to this emotional turmoil. ever consider if this relationship is worth all the mental and emotional stress? 🤔
totally feel you on this!!! betrayal hits like a ton of bricks; been there, it sucks real bad. "forgiveness ain’t about forgetting" is spot on!!! you can't just "move on" like nothing happened. who says you gotta pretend everything's fine?? people don't get how heavy this stuff is. trust's like fragile glass, once cracked, it ain't the same!!! hope you find some peace in this mess. keep pushing through. you're doing better than you think. ✊
I completely agree with your perspective!!! Betrayal leaves a lasting impression, and forgiving doesn't mean forgetting!!! It involves breaking away from those emotional chains that hold us back. You're approaching this with wisdom and strength, and it's clear you're on a path toward personal growth. Keep focusing on yourself because that's the key to moving forward!!! Don't let the past define your future. Stay strong, and remember, you're not alone in this!!!
forgiveness is a challenging journey, and you've got a strong handle on it. it's about letting go of that emotional chokehold, and not letting the past dictate your future; looking at things from a fresh angle can really help. your resilience is inspiring, and it sounds like you're making steady progress through this tough phase. sometimes, it might seem like an uphill battle, but you've got the strength and insight to navigate it. keep holding onto the positives and pushing forward because it's clear you're on the right track.
i really resonate with much of what you've shared. it takes a lot of courage to lay everything out and be vulnerable about such a painful experience. your journey toward forgiveness is commendable, and i truly believe that letting go of the emotional grip of betrayal can lead to personal empowerment; it’s not about forgetting but rather about finding peace within yourself. years ago, i went through something similar, and though it’s challenging, it taught me resilience in ways i didn't expect. you've got incredible strength, and it sounds like you're on a path toward healing. keep nurturing that inner strength and continue to find solace in the things that bring you joy. you're making great progress, and it shows. stay strong and never lose hope. 😊
this really hits home, i absolutely agree with you!!! the way betrayal messes with your head is something else; it leaves a scar you can't just cover up. "forgiveness ain't about forgetting," totally get that. it just shows how complex and deeply personal these emotions are. i had a similar experience, and it's a mental struggle trying to keep your sanity intact. trust is like fragile glass, once it's cracked it can never be the same again, which really sucks. you gotta do what's best for your own emotional bandwidth. how do you even begin to forgive when that trust is blown to bits? 🤔