He lied
The story
So, here's the thing: for six months now, every Thursday evening, my partner has been lying to me. He leaves the house, looking all professional and telling me that he's working late at the office. "Don't wait up," he'd say with a smirk, like he was doing me a favor by not being around. 🙄 But, surprise surprise... turns out he's been secretly attending a class instead of actually hustling away at work.
I mean, I'm not against self-improvement or lifelong learning...hell, if he's taking some knitting class to make me a sweater for winter, then great! 🎉 But the fact he felt the need to lie about it? That's what irks me. It's like he pulled this sneaky move during our relationship while I was busy planning our future together (without any illusions of him being some "overachiever" indicative). What gives?
Last week, while waiting for my train on an ancient platform with chipping paint and plastic seats more uncomfortable than grandma's couch from 1973, I saw him. Like literally spotting Sasquatch in those blurry photos: they're real! My bundle of 'truthiness', casually strolling towards a classroom with no office building nearby in sight whatsoever. Not even close.
I'm puzzled why someone might choose downright deception over honesty when it comes down to something as benign as taking another course off-campus. Could've just said so from day one: we'd still be partners embarking on my beloved journeys unscathed now that jealousy wasn't invited back home without RSVP surprises first-hand tickets (LOL!).
Confrontation or understanding? Trust shook here lately makes harder decisions on future paths tread apart possibly unless resolve strengthens growth instead reverts fears dampened attempts steps taken marrow times past shared lifeholds unique together permanently staying much longer ahead?
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Man, that's a wild ride! Maybe he's feeling embarrassed or insecure about taking the class? Sometimes folks lie 'cause they're worried what you'll think or that it might not fit with how they want to be seen. Sounds like a convo is def needed, but keep it chill; he might surprise you with his reasons 🙂
While I can comprehend your frustration at the breach of trust, it's critical to approach this situation with a mindset focused on communication and reconciliation: by having an open conversation, you might uncover his reasons for secrecy and possibly strengthen your relationship through understanding each other better.
i kinda get why they lied it's probably easier sometimes to avoid conflict but yeah hiding stuff is different. can't forget that.
Exactly! Like avoiding conflict does seem smart till you totally mess everything up!
Yeah, totally. I get that avoiding conflict might seem easier at first: it can snowball though. Isn't it so weird how even little secrets can start messing with trust like that?
Damn, that's rough. I get why you're ticked off; the secrecy is so unnecessary! 🤔 At least owning up to it would've been a lot less complicated than sneaking around. Sometimes, people act all shady and turn minor things into big problems. Hopefully, having a heartfelt discussion could clear the air and make sense of his need for all that cloak-and-dagger stuff...
Exactly! The whole cloak-and-dagger ninja act is what makes everything so frustrating. I mean, what's the worst that could happen from sharing about a class on Thursdays? It's not like joining MI6 unless it's some super-secret spy course (LOL!). Maybe a talk will finally shed light on this mystery and put my inner Sherlock Holmes to rest!
Wow, what a situation! It honestly reminds me of this time when my roommate used to disappear every Tuesday night and claimed he was in the library studying. Turns out, he was actually taking salsa dancing lessons:he wanted to surprise us all by being the "dancing king" at our friend's wedding. 😂
Honestly though, I totally get where you're coming from. The breach of trust is what's distressing; it's not really about what he's doing but the fact that it was concealed from you like some kind of secret mission. Being open would've been so much better.
But maybe sit down with him? Give him a chance to explain why he felt he couldn't just be upfront about it; sometimes people think they're protecting someone else's feelings while inadvertently complicating things more.
Do you think it could be something unrelated to the course, like perhaps an insecurity or fear of judgment? It'll be interesting to know his side so you both can move forward positively.
lying about taking a class?
wow, i totally get where you're coming from!! that feels like such a betrayal out of left field especially when it’s about something as harmless as a class. it's just so confusing why honesty wasn't the default choice here... man, relationships really thrive on trust and this kind of deception definitely sets off those red flags. maybe he thought you'd judge him or he was embarrassed, but still, bringing it up casually would've saved you both so much trouble! i'm no sherlock but after seeing him saunter towards that classroom, it feels like your guts were right all along. hope you guys can have an open conversation about this without things blowing up into orbit... sometimes people hide stuff for the weirdest reasons even if they aren’t necessarily bad intentions behind it!
dude, that's rough... the lying's gotta leave a bad taste in your mouth; it's like a friend of mine found out her dude was secretly signing up for cooking classes. she was all "why not just tell me? it's kinda cool you're learning how to whip up something better than burnt toast." 😅 but he felt she needed to respect his "space"; sometimes people hide stuff for reasons that aren't entirely clear, maybe he's embarrassed or just didn't wanna come off as abandoning your plans. have you had a sit-down with him since you spotted him doing his thing? kinda curious if there's a reason behind it all or if he's just totally clueless about why it upset you so much.
It seems your partner's actions reveal a rather convoluted choice to hide something benign, and yes, that is indeed puzzling; one might speculate if the deception was rooted in deeper issues of insecurity or even shame about their pursuits. While secret class attendance certainly does not equate to some calamitous affair, the underlying betrayal of trust remains significant. This situation projects an unnecessary masquerade, forcing you into an awkward scenario where confrontation becomes inevitable. Addressing this with your partner could provide clarity on both sides as building a relationship without authenticity undermines its very foundation. Relationships thrive on mutual transparency, and this opportunity might even help unearth why they felt so compelled to engage in this pretense initially.
Exactly! Why hide something so simple? Like, what's the big secret here? It's just a class, not some dramatic scandal. I'll definitely have to address this head-on because how can I trust him if he can't even be honest about going to school? And maybe figure out the why behind the sneakiness.
Man, that's a whole lot of words just to say you're upset he didn't tell you about the class. If he felt like he had to lie, maybe he's insecure or worried about your reaction? Yeah, it sucks that he snuck around, but calling him Sasquatch isn't really going to fix things. Maybe it's time for an honest chat instead of jumping straight to conclusions about future paths and whatever "lifeholds" are. 🙃
Haha, yeah maybe you're right. Sasquatch was a bit much. I guess it just felt so shocking to stumble on him like that. Maybe I will talk to him... once I've sorted out my own messy feelings about this whole thing first.
that sounds so frustrating. reminds me of when my friend told his wife he was going to the gym every morning, but he actually just went for long walks to clear his head. she thought he hated exercise and lying about it seemed odd like why not just say? honesty might feel hard sometimes but it's usually the way to go. hope y'all figure this out without too much drama.
It's kinda baffling why he'd lie about something like this. Seriously, it's not like attending classes is scandalous. 🤔 Maybe there's a deeper reason behind this secrecy? People sometimes believe they need to uphold certain expectations or project an image that aligns with how they think their partner sees them. I remember my buddy once pretended he hated running just cuz his girlfriend couldn't stand exercise fanatics (ridiculous but true). Might be worth exploring why he chose this path over being upfront; who knows what insecurities or pressures he's dealing with?
dude, sounds like he thinks you can't handle the truth about a class??!! come on, who lies about that? more honesty and less drama, please. seems like he's living in some weird spy thriller where night classes are top secret. question is: why'd he think you'd freak out over something so simple?! maybe there's more to this story or just a big misunderstanding;
Exactly! It's such an odd thing to lie about, right? Almost makes it like he's on some secret mission or something. There must be more going on in his head about what I’d think than I realized.
Maybe he's got a quirky reason like taking a salsa dance class, imagining you'd tease him about his two left feet. 😂 Who knows? In my experience, people sometimes do things in secret for reasons that have less to do with us and more to do with their insecurities. I remember when my partner secretly joined CrossFit 'cause he didn’t want me to see the awkward beginner phase. Like, communication is key, but folks can be weirdly defensive about hobbies! Maybe once you've cooled down (that train platform seating sounds rough), you can approach it lightly and see what’s up before jumping into conclusions about your future together.
Have you considered the possibility that he wanted to surprise you with something special or felt a level of pressure to maintain an image of being busy with work?
totally same story when friend told me lies 😠🌪️
Ugh I feel you! Shady behavior is just gross.
Did anyone else feel like maybe he was just trying to keep it a fun secret surprise?
Hmm, I can't help but wonder... maybe there's something more to his choice of secrecy? 🌟 It's possible he's dealing with some internal pressure or fear of not meeting certain expectations in your relationship. I'd suggest considering whether there's been any recent changes or stressors in his life that might've led him to conceal this little detail. Sharing such concerns could unravel others beneath the surface, opening doors for a deeper connection if handled gently and with care.
what's the big deal tho?
'Cause trust matters maybe?
It's the lying that bothers me, you know? If he can't be honest about something small like a class, then what else might he hide? It's not so much the class itself but the trust that takes a hit.