Just need to rant
The story
So I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and he is a bit older. I love him for the most part and it's mostly good but I feel bored sometimes. I don't wanna do anything crazy but sometimes I'd like if he'd plan things spontaneously. Not even something elaborate or expensive but anything. He does fun things but we both tend to be busy and we only get saturdays and weekday evenings and throughout the week we'll meet briefly. Of course I've communicated it and he wants to do things and he'll talk about it but it's the actually doing it part. Also even after we spend a couple hours together Saturday I often feel bored during or afterwards and I find myself wishing we would do more. Sometimes I regret being with an older guy and I love many things about him but it kinda sucks not being able to do things that I've wanted to. And I don't want to tell him about the regret or disappointment because I don't wanna hurt him but I do tell him about the things I wish we did. I know he's focused on making money and so am I but I can't help how I feel. And I feel like I'm a shitty person for feelings these things.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Totally feel you on this; happens to me too when there's a lack of spontaneity… Like, sometimes I get why they're all about that hustle culture, but it gets mundane; honestly, communication is key but it's like a broken record sometimes. And then there's the guilt of even feeling this way, right? I was once in a similar dynamic and it felt like sacrificing excitement for stability. You're not at fault for your emotions, it's just how humans are wired; but yeah, balancing emotions with commitment is tricky. Maybe small tweaks can bring in that spontaneity—good luck with this!
Yeah, I mostly get where you're coming from 🤔 Seriously though, you need to have a little more zest in your life. I totally understand being swamped with work, but it ain't an excuse for being plain boring — been there, done that.
Try talking to him again, maybe be more assertive, because trust me, if he's not getting off his comfy couch to plan a simple date — well, that's not too much to ask for. I remember dating someone who just wouldn't leave his damn comfort zone, and it drove me up the wall 💥
I still reckon you're entitled to want more action in your life. But hey, don't forget communication is a two-way street. Long story short: balance is essential. Find what really sparks joy for both of you 👌
kinda think it ain't just about spontaneity 😕 maybe chill and enjoy the simple moments 🤷♂️ always chasing excitement can be exhausting. i reckon that stability has its perks too but yeah throwing in some spice could help but not the main thing to stress over might wanna focus on what really matters in the long run. 😊
absolutely feel you on this. it sounds like you're really craving that spontaneous spark in your relationship. partners can sometimes get caught up in the routine grind, especially when career ambitions are in play, which might make things feel a bit mundane at times. consider suggesting small, meaningful activities that don’t require lots of planning or money. this could potentially motivate him to step outside the usual pattern. remember, prioritizing shared experiences can enhance your connection and bring a fresh perspective to your relationship. stay optimistic, because positive change often follows honest conversations and mutual understanding.
sounds like you're dealing with a pretty common issue. a lot of folks end up in relationships where things get a tad too predictable. it's not always about not caring, you know? sometimes they're just oblivious. if he's just “talking the talk” but not stepping up, maybe it's time for a more blunt chat. what's the harm in saying, “i need more excitement” or “can we shake things up a bit?” if boredom is creeping in, change up your game plan; we all have limited time, right? why not use it for fun and growth??? balance is crucial, and so is making sure you both contribute to the solution!!!
totally hear ya, it's rough when things get stale 😕 feels like maybe he needs a bit of a nudge. sometimes people don't realize they're stuck in a rut. my friend said something similar once, "sometimes you just need that fresh spark." it's really important to mix things up a bit; planning small surprises could help. i went through a phase like this and found that little adventures make a big difference. hope you can find that balance too!