Just need to rant
The story
So I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and he is a bit older. I love him for the most part and it's mostly good but I feel bored sometimes. I don't wanna do anything crazy but sometimes I'd like if he'd plan things spontaneously. Not even something elaborate or expensive but anything. He does fun things but we both tend to be busy and we only get saturdays and weekday evenings and throughout the week we'll meet briefly. Of course I've communicated it and he wants to do things and he'll talk about it but it's the actually doing it part. Also even after we spend a couple hours together Saturday I often feel bored during or afterwards and I find myself wishing we would do more. Sometimes I regret being with an older guy and I love many things about him but it kinda sucks not being able to do things that I've wanted to. And I don't want to tell him about the regret or disappointment because I don't wanna hurt him but I do tell him about the things I wish we did. I know he's focused on making money and so am I but I can't help how I feel. And I feel like I'm a shitty person for feelings these things.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Totally feel you on this; happens to me too when there's a lack of spontaneity… Like, sometimes I get why they're all about that hustle culture, but it gets mundane; honestly, communication is key but it's like a broken record sometimes. And then there's the guilt of even feeling this way, right? I was once in a similar dynamic and it felt like sacrificing excitement for stability. You're not at fault for your emotions, it's just how humans are wired; but yeah, balancing emotions with commitment is tricky. Maybe small tweaks can bring in that spontaneity—good luck with this!
Yeah, I mostly get where you're coming from 🤔 Seriously though, you need to have a little more zest in your life. I totally understand being swamped with work, but it ain't an excuse for being plain boring — been there, done that.
Try talking to him again, maybe be more assertive, because trust me, if he's not getting off his comfy couch to plan a simple date — well, that's not too much to ask for. I remember dating someone who just wouldn't leave his damn comfort zone, and it drove me up the wall 💥
I still reckon you're entitled to want more action in your life. But hey, don't forget communication is a two-way street. Long story short: balance is essential. Find what really sparks joy for both of you 👌
kinda think it ain't just about spontaneity 😕 maybe chill and enjoy the simple moments 🤷♂️ always chasing excitement can be exhausting. i reckon that stability has its perks too but yeah throwing in some spice could help but not the main thing to stress over might wanna focus on what really matters in the long run. 😊