Broke up with someone who I thought I was gonna marry
The story
I'm struggling through a break up. It was a three year a relationship with someone I thought I was going to marry and have a future with. We decided to remain friends because we still love and want each other in our lives, even if it means transitioning into a friendship. We are currently going through a period of no-contact to give ourselves a grace period before we try to make a friendship work. It's been hard. Although I love the freedom and flexibility I now have, thinking about them moving on and trying to move on myself hasn't been easy. I've been struggling physically and mentally. It's been affecting my work, not by much, but I do see myself making mistakes and slowing down drastically in terms of work ethic. I know this is for the better, but I still get moments of wishing I could go back and crying over this. It doesn't help that they make it look like they're having an easier time transitioning through this. I know that's such a selfish assumption and people grieve differently but I guess there's a part of me that feels like I'm the only one struggling. I don't know what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to get back on my feet at work and pushing through with enrollments for my master's degree. I'm scared I won't find love anymore after this, and honestly I don't know if I can do anything better than what I had with them. I'm just not doing so great. Unlike my other breakups though, this one has no hatred or anger involved, it's just the yearning and mourning over something I was building my life for. I don't know how to go on... I mean, I'm trying my best but I don't know...
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Hey there, I understand you're having a tough time, but I've gotta say, it sounds like you're complicating things. 🤔 This whole "staying friends" thing is a slippery slope. Like they say, "you can't heal in the same environment that made you sick." I remember trying to stay friends with an ex, thinking it was the mature thing to do, but it just made it harder to move on. 😬 Why put yourself through that emotional rollercoaster?
I get that it's tempting to hold on, especially when it feels like the other person is moving on quicker. But honestly, social media and appearances can be deceiving. They might not have it as together as you think. 🤷♂️
Meanwhile, focusing on your career and master's degree is a strong move. But try not to let one aspect of your life derail others. I've found that diving into self-care and personal growth worked wonders for me…
Remember, sometimes you have to "let the ship sink to learn to swim again." Reframe your narrative from fear to opportunity. And trust me, love will come around again, probably when you're not even looking for it. Keep your chin up!
Hey, I totally relate to what you’re going through. I just think maybe you’re making it harder than it has to be? 😅 Staying friends with an ex, especially right after a breakup, can be tricky business. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," but in this case, maybe the absence could also help you gain clarity!?
You're right that people grieve differently, and just because it seems your ex is handling it better doesn’t mean they truly are. Why do you think they appear to be transitioning more easily??? Everyone processes at their own pace, and you shouldn't compare your journey to theirs.
It's great that you're focusing on your master's degree and getting back into work. Remember the saying, "The best way out is always through." It’s okay to take baby steps, one day at a time, without pressuring yourself too much. 🤗❤️
Life has a fantastic way of surprising us with new chapters when we least expect it. Trust that new opportunities—and maybe even new love—will come knocking when you’re ready!!! Stay positive and keep at it! 🌟
hey, sounds like a rough patch you’re going through. i gotta say, staying friends with an ex sounds like a real struggle. i once tried it, thinking it'd be cool, but yeah, it wasn't so smooth. maybe a bit of space could do wonders?
sounds like you're putting yourself under a lot of pressure thinking about what they’re up to. trust me, appearances can be deceiving. people show what they want others to see. why not focus more on your own growth?
being worried about not finding love again is pretty common. happened to me too after a long relationship ended. but, honestly, life is full of surprises, and you never know what’s around the corner.
keep pushing through with work and your master's; things will fall into place eventually. healing takes time, and that's okay. you've got this 👍