Is this normal? Disgustion...

i can relate to what you're going through, kinda like when i always think about upgrading my car but then get tired of it after a few months. liking the idea more than reality is common. also, sometimes we idealize relationships too much and reality doesn't match our expectations. maybe slowing down and really getting to know someone before diving in might help prevent that "disgustion," as you've put it. it's worth considering if taking things at your own pace changes the experience 🙂

your situation really reminds me of how some people get this shiny new toy and once the novelty wears off, it's like... meh; guess it’s quite natural to have a difference in what we fantasize versus reality. maybe part of it could be about understanding what's driving the initial attraction vs what's turning you off later? that might help you get more clarity on why those feelings develop. sometimes digging into our own expectations can reveal surprising things, you know? have you ever noticed if there's a pattern in what triggers these feelings? 🤔

I totally get that feeling. Once, I thought I was ready for a relationship too, but every little thing started irritating me about them. It's confusing when want doesn't match reality...

Why date him then?

Your issue started with "this dude likes me..." but just because a dude likes you does not mean you have to consider him as a potential partner. People like people all the time. Other people will like you. If you are getting the ick, trust it.

you should just stay single if its like this 😯

I understand your concern, but maybe it's worth exploring the root of these feelings?? Sometimes they stem from something deeper within us and not necessarily from the other person.

feel ya really tho...

yo, i totally relate to you on this!! it’s like when you really want a new hobby, get all into it, then lose interest fast. i think some of us just love the thrill of the chase and not so much the day-to-day reality 😅; maybe there's some fear of commitment playing tricks on your mind too??? but seriously, don't beat yourself up about it!!! relationships are tricky... emotions can be all over the place sometimes. happened to me once with someone amazing...felt like an idiot for backing out but i guess everyone's got their own pace 🤷‍♂️

I've known folks who experience what you're describing, that sudden 180 in feelings. It's almost like your mind builds up this perfect scenario and when reality doesn't fit, it creates a weird aversion. Could be worth exploring if there's a specific aspect in relationships that's triggering this shift for you. Have you considered if personal space or independence is something you really value and maybe that's why closeness feels suffocating over time?

hmm that's interesting cuz it seems like you really want connection yet there's just something that breaks it down. i wonder what triggers the opposite reaction?

This cycle might continue unless addressed. Have you considered discussing these feelings with someone who can offer perspective? It might help break the pattern.

I dunno, it almost sounds like you're more into the fantasy than reality, and maybe it's worth re-evaluating why you even want a relationship in the first place?

totally agree with you! once i dated someone and everything was great at first, but eventually even their laugh would irk me. felt like i wasn't cut out for this whole dating thing and started questioning myself too. it’s hard to deal with those mixed emotions when reality sets in after the honeymoon phase.

your story got me thinking about how sometimes we're just not in the right headspace for a relationship even if we want one. i tried dating someone once because all my friends were coupled up, and i thought it'd be fun too; turns out, it didn't take long before their habits started annoying the hell out of me. maybe it's more about figuring out what you truly want within a relationship rather than jumping into one? ever tried hanging out casually without any pressure to see if this dude's personality or quirks are why you're getting those disgusted vibes? exploring things at your own pace might give some insight into how you actually feel about him. relationships shouldn't feel forced...

i know exactly what you mean, had a similar experience where after being in the relationship for a few months everything about her annoyed me so much... even small things that normally wouldn’t bother her other pals would. it was confusing cause i liked the idea of us a lot before actually dating.

Wow, this really reminds me of when I was obsessed with getting into rock climbing. Got all the gear, watched vids, imagined crushing it, then actually hit the wall and...not so much love for it anymore 😅. It's like some kind of mental mismatch happens when our dreams face reality; maybe the spark fizzles because we built up a perfect image in our heads? 🤔 I've found taking things slow helps sometimes (like tasting new music gradually instead of jumping head-first into an album). Embracing imperfections or quirks can sometimes lead to finding unexpected hidden gems... or realizing faster what just ain't it.

maybe you're just not ready yet?

u overthinkin jus go w flow!

so real, it's like our brains are sabotaging us or something, right?? maybe it’s not the person but just how we're wired about intimacy. like, there's this pressure to feel all lovey-dovey once you're in a relationship. have you ever felt this same 'ick' with friendships or is it just romantic relationships? i wonder if it's more about commitment that freaks people out...

really though?

have you tried talking to a therapist about how you feel with relationships? maybe there’s something else beneath these feelings that can be unpacked?

I completely relate to your situation. I've gone through a similar experience where each time they showed affection, my interest dwindled quickly. It makes having genuine connections quite tricky sometimes.