Me and my partner have been together almost 2 years this year, and recently his mother passed away so I really tried my best to show my support from him and even try to cheer him up, I'm not rushing for him to get better immediately since losing someone you love isn't easy. But by the time he's shwoing positive energy or vibes around me and even saying that he already moved on as I further asked him if he is okay and such, I thought that everything would go back to normal.

Yesterday I accidentally fall asleep because I was really tired, but I didn't chat my partner that I fell asleep and such. So he's been giving me the cold shoulder which i really hate because its hard to make up with him when he's acting like that, but as much as possible I really tried to put my pride down as due to the issue that he is dealing with.

Just today I was asking if he is okay then he lashes out to me entirely on how he waited for hours and I didn't even bother updating him, even a simple one would've been nice he said, which I repeatedly kept saying my reason but he's still angry at me.

This hasn't been the first time that it happened but it's slowly killing me inside, I know that I should consider and try to understand his feelings that's why as much as possible when he's angry at me I dont argue with him and repeatedly kept saying sorry and I'll try to be better. One of the things that has marked my mind is that after I said that I'll be better ge said back to me that "you're only making it worst" and by the time that I need to go hom at his mom's funeral I happen to overhear the word "irritating" which I think he was referring to me because I kept on insisting that I need to go hom because I needed tl do something.

I'm really trying my best even pushing myself out of my boundaries even sometimes disobeying my parents orders just to be with him, it's slowly hurting the pain that I have been repeatedly been feeling over and over and over again keeps building up why is it unfair when it comes to me. Whenever I get angry it doesn't have to be like this complicated and hard to reach out to me why when it comes to him I would struggle a lot.

Im slowly getting tired, I still love him but im getting tired, I want to keep going but it's getting harder and harder.

I just want everything to end

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