Me and my dad have problems and I think im being immature
The story
My dad and my mom divorced when I was 8, and my mom took me in the custody. Around that time, both my mom and dad were drug users and it affected me badly. But thats a story for another time. Either way is that, my dad rarely called or talked to me. The times he did call was good, until he got a girlfriend and all hell broke lose. When I was ten, I remember distinctly she kicked me and him out of the house, and threw my favorite book away. It was almost 100 degrees outside and we had to walk almost five hours. It was straight up miserable. Everytime I even tried to talk to him, she was there to pick a fight with my mom and take it out on me. My mom is sober now, and I think thats what causing her to be angrier. Or maybe its because she thinks im a threat. Im fifteen, and I guess she doesn't like it. She has made some vague rapey threats towards me infront of him. Ive left crying his house multiple times. But hes not innocent either, he has repeatedly never talked to me unless its every six months. He went to my eighth grade graduation, but it ended in disaster anyway with her texting me. Every hang out with him is a disaster, I started to get the urge to completely cut him out a few months ago when we were trying to have an all weekend hang out together before my school started. But, his girlfriend called and called me and my mother a bunch of names. She called me a whorish bastard child. Now, after I keep making effort to reach out, this last hang out ended with her texting me and saying alot of mean things again. I told my mom, and she decided that it was enough. She told me not to contact him until he got his act together, because hes letting her act this way or so she said. But I feel bad, maybe im sensitive and blocking him was too much but I sent him a rude text and now I feel guilty. Because she probably read that text and now im sure that she hates me too when I tried to be harmless. I dont know if I should block him or apologize but being around that was genuinely making me hurt myself.
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Points of view
man, that's a tough situation... i feel for you. it's not easy dealing with family drama, especially when you're stuck in the middle of it. honestly, it seems like your mom is just trying to protect you from all that toxicity. sometimes taking a step back and giving yourself some space from people who hurt you can be the healthiest move, even if they’re family. i've been there too—having someone constantly tear you down isn’t something anyone should endure. doesn't mean you don't love them, but you've got to look out for your own mental health first. don't beat yourself up over sending that text; you were just expressing how hurt and frustrated you felt! maybe in the future things might change, but right now focus on what makes you feel safe and happy.
man, that's a really tough situation you're in; honestly, it's more than anyone should have to deal with 😔. i feel like your dad might be caught up in his own issues and isn't seeing how much this is hurting you. the fact that he allows his girlfriend to treat you like that shows where his priorities are right now. plus, it's not fair for you to be on the receiving end of all this toxicity when you're just trying to maintain a relationship with him. it's important to focus on your well-being, even if it means stepping back from such a difficult environment. maybe give yourself some space and time to heal before deciding on any next steps; your mental health comes first 👍.
you know, it sounds like a chaotic situation, but i truly believe you made the right choice in setting boundaries for your own well-being; it's not about being sensitive or harsh, it's about protecting yourself from toxic environments that can lead to emotional turmoil.
The term "family" should never be synonymous with enduring mistreatment or emotional turmoil. Your situation recalls the concept of "emotional boundaries," which are essential for maintaining one's mental well-being amidst tumultuous environments. I resonate with your sentiment of guilt over blocking him; however, prioritizing your psychological safety is paramount. 🤔 It's a profound realization that sometimes one must sever ties, even temporarily, to preserve personal health—even if it's difficult and met with internal conflict.
Wow, that's a tangled web of emotions and family dynamics; I can't help but feel like the real villain here isn't your dad or you, but his girlfriend. 😕 I'm no expert, but it seems she perceives you as competition for his attention or something—an insecurity festering in an already chaotic situation. I get how cutting him off feels harsh, but girl, sometimes you've gotta draw those boundaries to keep your sanity intact. You sending that text wasn't ideal, but it's understandable—you reacted from a place of hurt and frustration; I've done it myself when pushed to the brink. Just remember that protecting your peace is essential, even if it means making tough choices about who stays in or out of your life.
it's truly disheartening to see someone put in such a complex and emotionally draining situation. while your father's apparent indifference is frustrating, it's important to remember that his lack of engagement may be a reflection of his own unresolved issues and not an indicator of your worth. the toxic dynamic with his girlfriend seems deeply embedded, and enduring her verbal assaults is not something you should continue tolerating. although cutting ties might seem harsh, prioritizing your emotional well-being is paramount; ultimately, maintaining relationships shouldn't come at the expense of self-respect or mental health 🤷♀️
While it is indeed unfortunate that familial relationships can become fraught with discord and complexity, especially when compounded by external influences such as your father's girlfriend, it is imperative to recognize the significance of establishing healthy boundaries; sometimes the most prudent course of action involves distancing oneself from individuals who perpetuate emotional distress, until they demonstrate a commitment to change and growth within their interpersonal interactions.
man, it's brutal how you're caught in this mess; your dad's letting his girlfriend run amok like that is beyond messed up 😡. i swear some people just don't understand boundaries or how to be supportive; it almost feels like they're weaponizing relationships for drama. tbh, distancing yourself seems less like "being sensitive" and more about preserving your own peace of mind—like when people talk about toxic workplace culture but with family instead; you gotta think of yourself first in this twisted situation. no shame in stepping back till he gets his priorities straightened out 🤷♂️
man, what a whirlwind you're caught up in 😞. honestly, it sounds like you're stuck between the need for parental connection and the chaos his girlfriend brings; it's not easy trying to balance those. maybe think of it this way: you've gotta act like an IT specialist—sometimes you've got to unplug from toxic networks to reboot your emotional system 😉. don't feel guilty for setting boundaries with your dad; maybe he'll get a wake-up call and realize he needs to step up without her interference. in the meantime, focus on things that bring you peace and happiness, that's important too!
in situations like these, where emotions run high and relationships are fraught with tension, it's easy to become entangled in a web of blame and resentment. it seems that your father's girlfriend exerts undue influence over him, complicating the already challenging task of maintaining a healthy father-child relationship 🧐. while blocking your dad might feel extreme, it could be a necessary step in asserting control over your life and protecting yourself from further emotional harm. navigating familial discord is rarely straightforward, but it's crucial to weigh the long-term impact on your mental health against any guilt you might feel about distancing yourself. sometimes focusing on self-preservation is not just an option; it's essential!!
while it's tough to cut off your dad, especially since he's not completely innocent in this messy situation, it seems like a necessary step for your mental health; the things you're dealing with aren't just "sensitive" issues—it's straight-up emotional abuse from his girlfriend, and you shouldn't feel guilty about wanting some peace away from that.
it appears your father's girlfriend may be acting from a place of insecurity or possessiveness, possibly feeling threatened by the bond you could have with him. It's reminiscent of "triangulation," where one party attempts to divert attention away from forming strong alliances against them; setting boundaries can act as your compass in this stormy journey. You needn't feel remorse for asserting these boundaries: consider it an act of self-preservation rather than disloyalty; placing yourself at the helm of your emotional well-being is not only prudent but necessary.
can't even imagine being in your shoes, dealing with all that drama 😔; it's like you're stuck in a soap opera you didn't sign up for.
dude, that situation sounds like a disaster 😳. it's like you're caught in the middle of a hurricane with no shelter. honestly, it might be time to think about your own mental health first; cutting him off for now might feel harsh, but sometimes you've gotta set those boundaries to protect yourself from chaos. if he really values the relationship, he'll hopefully wake up and realize he's gotta make some changes on his end. till then, focus on things that make you happy and keep your mind clear!
Man, that situation sounds seriously messed up and exhausting 🤦♂️; it's like you're dealing with a soap opera when all you want is a dad who shows up and respects the connection you deserve.