Venting about my parents
The story
I love my parents like most kids. I’m 13, female. My mom, she’s strict but sweet. She always tries her best despite being tight on money, my dad is always there for me to talk to whether it’s about something stupid or deep concepts. My dad is silly and fun and while my mom is more laid back and strict on me I know she loves me and wants the best for me. They’re not bad parents but what’s really affecting me is their divorce. They’re got divorced a while ago, about 3 years now I think. Ever since then they still live in the same apartment, it’s my mom but my dad stays here. I don’t know why I think money reasons. Either way my dad gets really bad mood swings and easily gets angry. He’s also a bit paranoid I will admit. Recently my mom said we have to get our passports done again so we can go see my grandpa and in case I have any upcoming trips as I go into highschool. My dad for some reason was not happy about that. Usually they argue over text. While I’m still upset and can clearly tell when they’re fighting at least they keep it out of the hearing of me and my sister. It’s gone years since their last argument out loud. Today broke it. My dad yelled at my mom when she asked if he’d bring me to my tour of the highschool before my graduation. He said she was making him out to be a bad parent because he didn’t want to go and somehow that spiraled into how he didn’t want to get our passports done. He thinks my mom would take me in my sister away. She would never. I don’t know their thoughts but I KNOW my mom would never do that. They were yelling. It hurts to hear them yell. I wanted to cry but there’s nowhere I can be alone to cry because I share a room with my sister so I took a shower to cry in there. I was worried, am worried. Not about me. More about my parents and even more for my sister. She’s currently 10. She was 6 or 7 I think when she witnessed my parents get into their first and only physical fight, which was the breaking point of their marriage. It had been rough before then but that was what broke it. They had been screaming at each other and my dad accidentally pushed my mom into our room. I had been holding my sister on my bed and covering her ears, I was scared but I was more scared for her. I didn’t want her to have to hear that. But I only had two hand, not four and I couldn’t cover her eyes like I wanted. She was crying and she managed to break away to get to my mom and dad who weee struggling against each other. I was scared before and even more scared then. She was in the danger so I ran over and pulled her back so maybe she wouldn’t accidentally get hit. Ever since then whenever my parents fought out loud I’ve always been scared for her. How she felt, how would this effect her? I don’t even know if it does affect her, she always looks so neutral, maybe she’s used to it because she grew up in it. Either way I’m scared for her. I’m scared for my parents. I’m scared that they’re really going to break it off, that I’ll have to be moved around every couple days on a schedule between houses to be with them. I’m scared that it might get physical again. They’re divorced but they’re still living together, there’s nothing to stop that. If that happens could me and my sister not be able to see our dad again? Would the court think he’s not fit to be around us. I love my dad. I’m scared, so scared.
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Points of view
Totally get where you’re coming from, and yeah, it’s tough when parents fight—especially after a divorce. But honestly, you might be focusing too much on the negatives.
Been there myself, and I know it’s hard to block out the noise, but sometimes 'adults just gotta adult,' right? Focus more on yourself and your sister, and try not to stress over what you can’t control.
I get why you’re worried about things getting physical again, which is a valid concern, but unless you’ve seen signs of that happening, that’s a lot of stress to carry around. Just trying to keep it real here—because in my experience, worrying too much doesn’t change anything.
honestly i don't see why you're so worried! like yeah stuff happens and parents argue... but it ain't the end of the world and it’s just part of life!
remember "it takes two to tango" so maybe give them some credit for trying their best! 😊 everyone's dealing with their own mess and things change over time... i bet they'll work it out somehow 🤞 keep your head up and stay chill!
i get where you're coming from, but it seems like you might be overanalyzing the situation a bit. while it's understandable to feel anxious about your parents' arguments, it's important to recognize that conflict resolution is a process they might be working through. their cohabitation post-divorce could be driven by financial constraints, which is quite common in many families. perhaps your parents are doing their best to maintain a stable environment for you and your sister; sometimes, maintaining a sense of normalcy takes priority over everything else. focusing on communication and understanding the underlying factors might help you see their efforts in a different light. while it's natural to feel concerned, try to view these challenges as part of the larger picture of family dynamics and resilience.