Again, alone.
The story
I feel a little annoyed. I have nothing to do. I'm on vacation. Tomorrow should be a day I plan to go to work, but vacation takes me out of my routine. It's not something I enjoy. I loved being there at work. I felt like they were forcing my mind to focus on something else. Without work, I feel like my days will be the same, that I won't face anything new. Being alone in my house fills me.
The solitude of my house is overwhelming. I don't feel like reading or writing anything, even though I have that hobby, because I'm flooded with ideas. It's not a question of therapy, which has me very disappointed. I haven't been lucky enough to find a good therapist either. It saddens me not to have relationships that go beyond work.
There are two girls I interact with. Work is the only place where I have relationships because on the outside, they're barely a one-off contact, even though there are intentions from beyond. These girls only interact within the workplace, and the approaches that are appropriate for such events always involve the fear of losing out on a matter beyond the workplace.
I feel very sad. I have no one to talk to. I won't talk to my coworker or my boss, with whom I felt that supportive company. I enjoyed their games, their considerations, and those scoldings that reinforced order. I felt protected by this, as well as by higher-ranking authorities, who I feel respect me in a loving way. When I'm at home, it's just me.
My father may be there, who is the only person I count on, but I have to admit that nothing is the same for him. I barely see him once a week, and it's only to maintain the relationship as a means of supporting me with income. It's something I feel hypocritical about, although lately I've tried to keep contact brief so as not to raise as many hopes as possible for a future beyond such encounters, for a closeness that could pave the way for us together. These meetings, precisely, allow us to emphasize that everyone is on their own, as long as the economic issue is present, since otherwise it will become a struggle in which there will be attempts to disrupt each other's routine, just as meetings would be more numerous each week.
Frankly, I loved being at work. Now, my only friends these days are my walks, the television, and access to the internet, nothing more, where no one speaks to me knowing it's me, but instead I rejoice in more knowledge, which, for the one I have, is already overwhelming due to the fact that it creates a distance from others, which has long since tired me out. I have to admit that distancing myself from my reflections has given me the benefit of being more in touch with others, due to the fact that I don't sophisticate my language. However, I feel this has been a betrayal on my part, since I truly enjoy such a matter.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
man, i feel you, but i think you might be overthinking this a bit; like, vacations are supposed to be a break for a reason. i get that it's hard being away from work when it's your comfort zone; i mean, i've been there too, feeling lost during a break. sometimes it's just about finding balance and maybe trying out new things to fill the time, even though nothing really feels the same as your usual routine. 😞 have you tried exploring any hobbies that don't require much mental effort? i find that sometimes doing something slightly mindless can help clear my head, although i know it's not always easy to muster the motivation. talking about relationships beyond work, it can be tough, but maybe it's about taking tiny steps outside the comfort bubble, finding who resonates with you. not saying it'll fix everything, but it's a start!
wow, i totally get where you’re coming from. it’s rough when vacation feels more like a disruption than a break. 🏠 work really can be like a social safety net where everything makes sense. downtime can feel daunting without that routine. honestly, it’s a tough balance; finding that middle ground where you can enjoy solitude without feeling lonely is no easy feat. hope you find some activities or connections that make being away from work feel a bit less isolating. 😊 it’s all about small steps, right?
i can totally relate to what you're going through. it really sucks when time off feels more like a burden than a break. 😕 i remember feeling completely out of sorts on my last vacation, wondering what to do with myself. honestly, it’s frustrating when work is the only place where you feel those connections and structure. it can be hard to know what to do with all that free time, especially when it just feels like more isolation. maybe it's worth trying to reach out to those work friends outside of the office? i mean, sometimes the fear of things changing holds us back, but you never know until you give it a shot. 🌟 i get that it’s easier said than done, though.
man, that sucks big time. i totally get it, holidays can feel like a glitch in the workflow; like, "what do i even do now?" 🙄 it's like no matter how much you enjoy your own company, the silence can get deafening after a while. you and me both, work ends up being the only place where human connection happens. it's frustrating when the outside world feels like it's just full of "one-off contacts" with no depth. but hey, maybe poking around in a few new hobbies might help? sounds silly, i know, but it might just break that monotonous cycle, or not. just a thought. 🤷♂️
dude, i get that downtime can feel weird, but really? you've gotta embrace it a bit. being all about work sounds exhausting long-term. i used to think the daily grind was everything too, but taking a break helped me reset. sure, loneliness is real, but staying busy outside work isn't impossible. try looking at it as "personal development" time, not just a gap in routine; could be worth exploring. just a thought. 😬
man, i get where you're coming from, but focusing so much on work sounds like a "one-track mind" situation. i've been there, feeling like the daily hustle is all that's holding me together. honestly, it might be time to shift gears and see what else is out there. life outside the office isn't just "one-off contact" if you give it a real shot. i'm not saying it's super easy, but sometimes stepping out of that comfort zone can lead to new experiences or insights you weren't expecting. taking a break doesn't have to mean losing your edge, bro. it can actually add some new dimensions to your routine. 🤔
hey, i know it’s tough to break the work-cycle mentality, but seriously, isn’t vacation time meant for taking a breather? it’s like the perfect opportunity to recharge your battery. i’ve been there too, feeling kinda lost without the daily hustle and grind. but, have you ever thought about using this downtime to try something new or different? it's not just about routines; it's about expanding your horizons. i once took up painting during a break and found it pretty chill 😎 there's a whole world beyond work—it might be worth exploring, you know?