I’m probably gonna meet my ex bestfriend and I'm scared
The story
I had this friend of mine, she was my first friend, we were together all the way from when we were in diapers till high school ended and then after she went abroad for university we drifted apart. Our relationship always felt toxic to me because I always felt like she didn’t place much importance to me, she would tell me that she won’t be able to talk to me before exams but would speak with everyone else, she would not tell me crucial stuffs like when would she leave or where she got admitted but everyone else would know ( I did ask her btw but I didn’t get any answer ). Weirdest thing is after she came back last time she looked for me she was probably confused why I was ignoring her as my other friends told me she asked questions about me to them.
Weirder is that I feel extremely guilty, I feel like what if we could go back to how it was before even though I know it probably won’t be good for me or her. So even though I’m scared out of my mind I am praying hoping that she atleast strikes up a conversation with me for once, she asks me about it, she questions me about what happened.
My other close friends and my family also know and they also say that our relationship wasn’t okay, it was not healthy but I don’t know why I am being like this.
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Man, I get why you're feeling all mixed up about this😟. It's totally normal to feel guilty when friendships go south, but ya gotta remember, it ain’t all on you. This friend acted like you were just an afterthought, which ain't cool! People like that leave you hangin’ and hit you up when it's convenient for them; That “drift apart” vibe isn’t just on you; she had her part in this too, didn't she? If everyone else could see the toxicity, they're probably right. But you're still hoping she'll reach out? Seriously??? Sometimes you gotta learn to let go for your sanity's sake. You deserve friends who treat you like you matter, not like an option when they’re bored! Keep your head up and focus on the peeps who truly give a damn.
sounds like you're hanging onto a lot of guilt for no reason🤔. people grow apart, and maybe she didn’t think the friendship was quite the same as you did. it doesn’t necessarily make her a bad person; just seems like a difference in expectations. in my experience, friendships like that are hard to maintain; you could spend time overthinking or just move forward. if she’s showed interest in reconnecting, it’s up to you, but consider if it's worth the emotional energy. sometimes, it’s best to focus on relationships that bring mutual value.
oh, this hits close to home. you’re not alone in feeling guilty about drifting apart from friends, especially when they've been around that long. it sucks when someone who should be important just doesn't treat you right, and it sounds like she wasn’t putting in the effort. you said yourself, "she didn't place much importance on you." that's messed up. it’s good to remember people change, for better or worse, and sometimes it’s just best to keep your distance. these things happen, and it feels like you're hoping for closure, which is understandable. maybe, give it time to see if she reaches out, but definitely keep focusing on your mental health and happiness, you know, the good stuff.
i dunno, this sounds more like a classic case of miscommunication than anything, no?!
trust me, i've been there. it's easy to feel left out when someone doesn't share everything with you, but sometimes people just handle stress and change differently. it doesn’t always mean they don’t care; i’ve had friends do the same, and we worked it out after realizing we both had our own issues to sort. maybe she’s just bad at keeping everyone in the loop, or maybe she didn’t realize how much it affected you. if she's asking about you now, maybe it’s a chance to clear things up since people can change; it could be worth hearing her side.
it seems like you're holding onto this friendship way too tightly, and, honestly, that might not be the best move 😕. sustaining relationships requires effort from both parties, and it appears she wasn't putting in the work. perhaps she wasn’t ignoring you on purpose, but it does not excuse the lack of communication on her part. if she only wants to catch up now, maybe it's because she realized some things, but who really knows? expecting her to magically “strike up a conversation” again seems unrealistic;. might be time to evaluate if this connection is truly worth salvaging or if you're simply nostalgic for something that wasn't as solid as you thought.