Why do i blame myself for everything?
The story
ever feel like you're somehow a magnet for blame? that's kinda been my life lately. i mean, no matter what happens, whether it's big or small, i always end up feeling like it's my fault. just last week at work, some files got misplaced. wasn't even something on my desk but there i was, spiraling into guilt as if i'd personally thrown them into the ocean.
it's like this constant loop in my head, playing over and over until i'm convinced that every mishap in the universe is directly linked to me. someone trips on the sidewalk? totally my fault for being there at that exact moment. phone dies midday? must've jinxed it somehow by complaining about battery life yesterday.
i know it sounds absurd when i say it out loud but inside, it feels very real. there's something about self-blame that grabs you like quicksand and before you know it (poof!) you're neck-deep and unable to climb out without help. it's not just affecting me mentally but also my relationships with people around me because let's be real: nobody wants to hang around with someone who's constantly down on themselves all the time.
heard this quote once that went something like 'we are our own worst critics' and honestly it's true. it's hard though trying to switch off that inner critic when it seems so deeply ingrained in who you are. makes me wonder if i'll ever break free from this exhausting cycle or if i'm destined to carrying this heavy load forever... maybe one day i'll figure it out but till then guess i'll keep trying baby steps.
