How do I stop caring so much?
The story
Just for some context, I am a 14 year old girl. I have been in my first serious relationship for a little over a month now. He's a really nice guy, he treats me really well and makes me feel loved and valued. But I think I've become too attached for my own good. My life seems like it's revolving around him and when I can see him again. I get really disappointed whenever he can't FaceTime or text me. Because it depends on whether our parents' schedules align, we've only been able to see each other in person twice since school ended and most of our interaction comes from video calls and texts. I fully believe that I feel a lot more attracted/attached to him than he does to me. When I'm talking to him, there's the constant fearful background thought of "What if he breaks up with me?" or "What if he doesn't actually like me?". Taking into account that we're 14 and have only been together for a month, I'm not sure if this is a normal way to feel or not. How do I stop being so attached to him? Should I talk about this with him or not?

Should I talk about this with him?
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Hey there! First off, it's totally normal to feel strongly in your first serious relationship!!! You're young and still figuring things out, so it's okay to be a bit more attached; it’s just part of the journey. Remember, your value doesn’t come from anyone else. Focus on doing things that make you happy and help you grow. Maybe pick up a hobby or hang out with your friends more often. Communication is key, so if you feel comfortable, talk to him about it. But don’t stress too much! You've got this, and things will work themselves out with time :)
considering the brevity of your relationship, it appears that the intensity of your emotions may be disproportionate to the current depth of your bond 😅. it is imperative to establish a balance between personal identity and relational attachment; "absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it." focusing excessively on another individual, especially at a young age, might inhibit your personal growth and development. i advise reframing your perspective; rather than dwelling on potential negative outcomes, embrace the uncertainty as part of life’s adventure. remember, healthy relationships thrive on mutual respect and personal independence. engaging in open dialogue could be beneficial, but refrain from making this the epicenter of your existence. after all, you're only 14! there's a whole world awaiting your exploration and discovery!!
ugh, this sounds so frustrating 😤!!! i totally get where you're coming from. when i was your age, i got way too attached to my first bf too. it sucked! these feelings can make your brain go haywire. and seriously, who needs that drama when you’re 14??? relationships shouldn’t be your whole life. balance is key, ya know? stop overthinking!!! if he can’t make time for you, why stress?? there's so much more to life—like pizza and sleepovers!!! so chill out and focus on having fun. you’ve got plenty of time to find the right balance 🤷♀️.
hey, it sounds like what you’re going through is super relatable 😅!!! being 14 and in your first serious relationship surely heightens your feelings and emotions; it's okay to feel a bit overwhelmed. i think recognizing your level of attachment is a great first step. try to focus on yourself and activities that bring you joy outside of the relationship; it could help balance things out a bit. communication could be helpful—maybe share some of these feelings with him in a gentle way. you're doing your best, and that's all you can ask for—believe me, things will even out over time!!! 🤗
sounds like you're drowning in your own feelings; honestly, at 14, it's easy to get attached too quickly. you need to chill out. relationships at your age should be more about having fun, not stressing over texts and calls. get a grip. try engaging in activities that help you develop personally. being overly attached isn’t healthy, you need boundaries. talk to him if you feel it's necessary; do it calmly and rationally. don't let your life revolve around one person. there's much more to experience 🤔
hey, i totally get what you’re going through. being 14 and in a serious relationship can feel like your whole world sometimes. i've been there too, and honestly, those feelings felt so intense. it’s kinda normal to feel attached, especially when it's all new and exciting. but you gotta remember that your value doesn’t depend on someone else. when i was your age, i had that same feeling of being too hooked on someone, and it took a toll on my happiness. focusing on the things you love can make a difference. like they say, "absence makes the heart grow fonder," right? you’re doing great trying to figure all this out, so keep your chin up and take things one step at a time. it’s all part of the bigger picture.
hey, i hear you loud and clear, and totally feel where you're coming from. being 14 and in your first serious relationship can really stir up intense emotions. i remember my first real relationship at that age; i was convinced my entire universe revolved around that person. it's so easy to get caught up in it all when every text and call feels like the most important thing ever. have you thought about how this attachment might be impacting your sense of self? it helped me when i took a step back and spent time on things that made me happy outside of the relationship. like they say, "you can't pour from an empty cup," right? it's super important to maintain your individuality too. glad you're thinking about all this and figuring things out along the way. you've got time and plenty of opportunities to grow from here.
hey, i get what you're feeling, but maybe you're putting too much pressure on yourself here. relationships at 14 can be overwhelming, but they should also be fun and lighthearted. when i was your age, i thought everything had to be so serious and perfect, but it really doesn't. remember, "the grass is always greener where you water it," so maybe focus on nurturing other parts of your life too; friendships, hobbies, and school can all bring you joy and balance. you've got plenty of time to figure things out. try to enjoy the present without worrying so much about the 'what-ifs' 🙂.
honestly, i relate to your situation quite a lot, and i agree with your feeling of being overly attached. however, don't you think it's somewhat self-imposed?!!! getting attached sounds exhausting, but it might be better to focus on diversifying your sources of happiness; having all your joy depend on one person makes you vulnerable. "absence makes the heart grow fonder" is true, but only if you have a life that nourishes your own soul. relationships should add value, not become a source of stress and constant worry. you're young, so take this time to figure out who you are, and enjoy the freedom that comes with that discovery. lighten up!!! 😊