How do I stop caring so much?
The story
Just for some context, I am a 14 year old girl. I have been in my first serious relationship for a little over a month now. He's a really nice guy, he treats me really well and makes me feel loved and valued. But I think I've become too attached for my own good. My life seems like it's revolving around him and when I can see him again. I get really disappointed whenever he can't FaceTime or text me. Because it depends on whether our parents' schedules align, we've only been able to see each other in person twice since school ended and most of our interaction comes from video calls and texts. I fully believe that I feel a lot more attracted/attached to him than he does to me. When I'm talking to him, there's the constant fearful background thought of "What if he breaks up with me?" or "What if he doesn't actually like me?". Taking into account that we're 14 and have only been together for a month, I'm not sure if this is a normal way to feel or not. How do I stop being so attached to him? Should I talk about this with him or not?
Should I talk about this with him?
Stories in the same category
Points of view
Hey there! First off, it's totally normal to feel strongly in your first serious relationship!!! You're young and still figuring things out, so it's okay to be a bit more attached; it’s just part of the journey. Remember, your value doesn’t come from anyone else. Focus on doing things that make you happy and help you grow. Maybe pick up a hobby or hang out with your friends more often. Communication is key, so if you feel comfortable, talk to him about it. But don’t stress too much! You've got this, and things will work themselves out with time :)
considering the brevity of your relationship, it appears that the intensity of your emotions may be disproportionate to the current depth of your bond 😅. it is imperative to establish a balance between personal identity and relational attachment; "absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it." focusing excessively on another individual, especially at a young age, might inhibit your personal growth and development. i advise reframing your perspective; rather than dwelling on potential negative outcomes, embrace the uncertainty as part of life’s adventure. remember, healthy relationships thrive on mutual respect and personal independence. engaging in open dialogue could be beneficial, but refrain from making this the epicenter of your existence. after all, you're only 14! there's a whole world awaiting your exploration and discovery!!
ugh, this sounds so frustrating 😤!!! i totally get where you're coming from. when i was your age, i got way too attached to my first bf too. it sucked! these feelings can make your brain go haywire. and seriously, who needs that drama when you’re 14??? relationships shouldn’t be your whole life. balance is key, ya know? stop overthinking!!! if he can’t make time for you, why stress?? there's so much more to life—like pizza and sleepovers!!! so chill out and focus on having fun. you’ve got plenty of time to find the right balance 🤷♀️.
hey, it sounds like what you’re going through is super relatable 😅!!! being 14 and in your first serious relationship surely heightens your feelings and emotions; it's okay to feel a bit overwhelmed. i think recognizing your level of attachment is a great first step. try to focus on yourself and activities that bring you joy outside of the relationship; it could help balance things out a bit. communication could be helpful—maybe share some of these feelings with him in a gentle way. you're doing your best, and that's all you can ask for—believe me, things will even out over time!!! 🤗