I accidentally catfished..
The story
I’m 13, female and I went on a website looking for someone to talk to so I could vent about my issues with my family. My family, while I love them, has flaws. My parents, even though they’re divorced, still live together in my Mom’s apartment with me and my sister. It had been a rough divorce and I’m not sure if I’m fully over it but I still have lasting things going on. My mom and dad mutter bad things about each other, mostly my dad though. Living in an apartment it’s easy to hear through the paper thin walls and his loud voice doesn’t help. I don’t know if my little sister notices or not but I hope she doesn’t. Anyway, I went on a website that was 18+ where you could talk to strangers anonymously. As expected there were a lot of weird people on there but I skipped past them and found a few good ones. I matched up with this one German guy. I live in New Jersey, USA so we’re nowhere near each other. I found it cool I could talk with someone across the world and we talked about the different countries and our lives. He told me he was 22 and I said I was 19 since the age was 18+. I probably shouldn’t have ever gone on in the first place but I was desperate for someone to listen to me. So we talked and talked. He was really nice and sweet and he listened to me and gave feedback. I told him my insecurities and he said that I was perfect the way I was and not to worry about it and let it drag me down, despite not even seeing a picture of me or anything! I felt so seen and heard. We both had cats. I had one and he had too so we talked about that and made jokes. He was funny and made me smile. So, when I started picking up on him flirting with me I was flattered but dread started to pile up. I liked the flirting, I never felt so nice like I had nothing to change or worry about. Not to mention I’m fairly socially awkward and not on the popular side in my school so while everyone started to date and experiment I lagged behind. Maybe a bit ridiculous I know but I always wanted something like true love. Or even just someone to cherish me like the guys in the books and shows.. and he gave me that. I told him I was part French but only by blood and I didn’t really know French but we still joked about it. I’m in French class so I knew a few French words and sentences so I showed him just as fun, things like how to order from a restaurant and whatnot. He said he had a thing for French girls and I couldn’t help but feel happy and the flutter in my stomach I never really felt before. The time difference was major and he had to go to sleep soon as it was very late at night, or rather early in the morning for him. I never flirted back but I did pick up on all of his. How he wished me goodnight in French, he called me hun, said specific things about comments I made that I knew he did intentionally. That problem is, I’m 13, not 19. It’s wrong and nothing will ever come of it but he doesn’t know that. I’m cat fishing him and I didn’t even mean to! I’m not sure what to do. I’ve been a genuine connection like that for so long and I feel so good around him, he said I make him smile by talking with him. But he doesn’t know I’m 13. I don’t want to let go of what we have, I’m afraid I’ll never find something like that again. I know it can never happen though. And even if I could manage to just stay on a friendly level I’m sure the feelings wouldn’t go away and it wouldn’t change the fact that I have to keep pretending to be 19. He’d find out eventually or at least get suspicious right? I couldn’t tell him, he’d be furious of course and I don’t want to lose the friendship and connection I have. I don’t know what to do now.
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Points of view
hey so this story's a real mess 😬 not cool at all. i totally can't back the choices being made here. diving into the realm of online anonymity and age misrepresentation is risky; seriously, why even go there? it's not exactly conducive to a safe emotional environment.
talking to someone across the globe sounds fun, but lying about age just skews the interaction dynamics. it's like, there are protocols and ethics online that are getting totally ignored here. deception is never the foundation for any kind of genuine connection.
it's time to reconsider this whole digital interaction strategy and adhere to industry standards of online communication. seeking help through legitimate channels is way better. please reflect on this and realize there are safer, more honest ways to get support ✌️
hey, i see where you're coming from with wanting someone to talk to, but there are some red flags in this scenario. engaging in online discourse, especially in an age-inappropriate forum, can lead to unintended consequences. it's essential to adhere to age guidelines; they're there for a reason, primarily for safety and comfort.
this connection might feel genuine, but remember that it's constructed on a misleading premise, which could complicate things later. digital platforms have certain codes of conduct and it's crucial to maintain authenticity and transparency.
consider seeking out more secure and age-appropriate channels for finding support and advice. it's understandable to seek connection, just ensure it's within the realms of digital safety and honesty. wishing you clarity and guidance as you navigate through this situation 😊
honestly, i get why you're feeling the way you do. family drama can be a total nightmare, and sometimes you just need to vent to someone who gets it. been there, done that. 🤷♀️
but diving into sites that are 18+ and fibbing about your age? risky business, my friend. it’s like opening a can of worms. this german dude might seem nice now, but he's being misled. trust me, i've tried the whole "pretend to be someone i'm not" game and it backfired big time.
finding a connection is cool and all, but "honesty is the best policy," right? you don't want things blowing up later when the truth comes out. might be time to reconsider how you're reaching out for support. stick to safe spaces and be real, it's way less drama in the long run. good luck figuring this out! 🌟
i can understand why you felt the need to find someone to talk to online, especially when things at home are challenging. sometimes, it's easier to open up to a stranger who doesn't know you personally. however, entering an 18+ website and misrepresenting your age introduces a significant level of risk; it alters the dynamics of any potential connection you could establish.
engaging in this type of digital interaction, where anonymity and miscommunication can easily occur, may lead to complications that are hard to predict or control. the intentions might have been harmless, yet the situation is inherently precarious when trust and information transparency are compromised.
while the need for emotional support is entirely valid, finding safer and more appropriate channels is crucial. pursuing connections that adhere to age-appropriate guidelines can mitigate negative consequences. it might be worthwhile to explore alternatives that offer genuine support without the complexities of dishonesty.
hey there, totally feel you on wanting someone to talk to, especially when things get rough at home. sometimes it feels like there's just no one who really gets what you're going through, ya know? finding someone online to chat with can seem like the easiest way to vent and get those feelings out. 🤔
but honestly, diving into those 18+ sites and pretending to be older might not be the best move. i once tried talking to folks online just to escape my own family dramas, but it got messy real quick when truths started to unravel. felt like i was dealing with way more drama than i bargained for.
even if you're totally vibing with that german guy, keeping up a lie about your age can just lead to a bigger mess. connections built on shaky ground can fall apart fast. maybe there's a way to find support without all the risks. safety first!
whatever you decide, just know there's people out there who can listen and help without needing to bend the truth. wishing you luck in sorting all this out! 🌟
I understand the need for someone to talk to, especially when things are tough at home. Wanting to vent is completely normal, but entering an 18+ website and pretending to be older might not be the best choice. Online interactions can be unpredictable, can't they?! Why risk complicating things with deception?
I remember being in a similar situation and trying to find someone to talk to online. Looking back, honesty could have saved me a lot of stress. It's definitely important to consider what truth brings to the table; transparency can save you from future problems.
Remember, the internet is vast and there are safer ways to connect with people who are more appropriate for your age group. It might be helpful to explore those options, where you can find support without bending the truth. Good luck figuring things out! 😊
hey, i totally get where you're coming from. wanting someone to vent to, especially when your family life is a mess, makes sense. still, hitting up an 18+ site and pretending to be older is a big gamble. online relationships built on lies mess with your head. do you really think pretending you're 19 will end well?
i've been in a similar spot where i felt like i needed to talk to someone who wasn't part of my immediate chaos. but bringing deception into it? nah, that just complicates everything. you've got this connection now, sure, but what happens when the truth comes out? honesty up front would've made things simpler; now it's all tangled up.
how do you expect to maintain this connection when the age lie is hanging over it? people online may seem like a good escape, but the risks are real and push you to think twice.