Niece’s hubby

Call me old-fashioned but I’m confused with my niece’s hubby’s behaviour post-wedding. Let’s call him Chad. He’s a nice guy, nothing major. Just we haven’t spoken much since the wedding. Before, he was the “fun boyfriend”, played with my kids and was respectful. We were excited for them at their engagement and we were even involved with the wedding. Fast forward about 15 months after the wedding. We live about 3 hours away so only visit our hometown a few times a year and always manage to visit the family, even if it’s just for an afternoon chat. The last three visits, Chad arrives at the meeting place (usually a family’s home) either late or doesn’t interact. The first time, niece had stated he was coming from the gym (but was showered and presentable). He greeted us with a smirk and a wave only; no hugs like before. He sat on the floor in front of his wife and fell asleep. Ok. He’s tired. No biggie.

Second visit, MIL invites everyone over for dinner. We’re all there chatting and having fun. Chad arrives late. Waves again, weak “hello” and proceeds to get his plate and eat outside with his teenage BIL. The kids go out to say hi and play but he mostly ignores them.

Our last visit was similar. He played with his phone and gave generic responses when we tried asking questions. It was like talking to a teenager! He never hugs us unless we go in first. We thought we were ok enough to hug as we did this all the time while they dated (2yrs). Now, he ignores us and the kids.

Why the change?? I’m not expecting celebrity treatment but not even a decent “hello” or time of day when we visit? Forget asking my niece or SIL. They will defend him and think he hung the moon.

I just don’t get it. I was raised to greet kindly and respectfully and interact. Suddenly, we’re suppose to exempt younger adults from these common-curtesy rules??

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