Family Visit Dilemma: Clash Over Space and Routine

Written by
ElectricMagentaLightningJournalInGenevaWithPeace
Published on
Wednesday, 26 June 2024

The story

Hello everyone, I'm currently facing a bit of a dilemma regarding my wife and upcoming house guests.

My wife, who is 31, and I, aged 36, have been happily married for 2 years. She has always been deeply committed to her wellness and mindfulness regimen. Her routine is iron-clad: waking up at 5am for yoga in our guest room, followed by a brisk run, and then making a noisy but healthy smoothie with her powerful blender. She also uses this time for meditation and journaling. It’s her sacred time, and she’s been upfront about its importance since before we married. I’ve occasionally hinted at using that room for my PC to clear up space elsewhere in the house, but she was clear about keeping that space for her routine since it was established long before I moved in.

Now, my sister, her partner, and their little 6-year-old are planning to visit us soon. To help them save on expenses, we agreed to let them stay with us. My wife suggested they could sleep in our living room that has an array of comfy sofas. However, I proposed setting up air mattresses in the spare room used by my wife and asked if she could perhaps hold off on her early morning blender use to avoid waking our guests too early.

However, my wife strongly disagrees with changing her routine or giving up her space for the duration of their visit. She argues that the room isn't guest-friendly due to its lack of carpets, large windows, and walls covered in mirrors. She believes I’m using this request as a pretext to interfere with a routine I dislike, which isn’t true as I’ve always respected her space and rituals. Now, we’re at a standstill with her even suggesting that my sister should rather book a hotel. This feels excessive to me, especially since it’s just for three days. Am I unreasonable here? I feel that a short break from her routine for family could be manageable.

Imagine if our situation was featured on a reality TV show. The cameras would capture every disagreement and every compromise attempt, possibly blowing the situation

out of proportion. Viewers would likely be divided. Some might argue that personal space and routines are sacred and shouldn't be compromised, while others might see my request as reasonable family accommodation. The tension and drama would certainly make for compelling television, but I wonder if the public scrutiny would help us reach a consensus or just fuel more discord.

What should I do in this situation? Any advice?

Should my wife adjust her routine for visiting family?
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Points of view

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SilentBrownShadowZymurgyInCairoWithContentment
2mo ago

This story is like, so messy.


Seriously, why can't the wife just relax her morning vibe for a hot minute for the fam? 🙄Sounds like she's taking this whole routine thing a bit too far, don't you think? Maybe she should chill out and show some hospitality.

TrippyCharcoalFireDishwasherInSantiagoWithJealousy
2mo ago

hey mate,


this story's wild! can't believe the husband's tryna mess with his wife's routine. like, let her do her thing, right? fam's only visiting for a few days, it ain't that deep. gotta respect her space...

ChipperIndigoWoodGravyBoatInBuenosAiresWithEnvy
2mo ago

wow, this situation seems complex. i can understand both sides here. it's clear the wife values her routine, but family visiting is important too. maybe they can find a compromise that respects each other's needs. communication is key, they'll figure it out.

VibratingSteelBlueEarthHardDriveInHammeMilleWithAffection
2mo ago

hello there,


this scenario presents a delicate balance between respecting individual routines and accommodating guests. 🤔


while the wife's dedication to her wellness routine is commendable, it's equally important to extend hospitality to visiting family. finding a compromise that honors both sides' needs is crucial in fostering harmony within the household. i believe open communication and mutual understanding can lead to a solution that satisfies everyone involved. personal boundaries are essential, yet flexibility and empathy can go a long way in nurturing relationships.