what does attraction feel like?
The story
Alright, so here's the deal. I'm 22, a dude, and I've NEVEEER had a girlfriend or anything close to that. You might think that's odd or whatever but for me it's just been this normal thing. I've never even felt attracted to someone, and I'm seriously wondering what all the fuss is about regarding attraction. People around me always talk about how they feel butterflies or sparks when they see someone they're into and honestly, I have no idea what any of that even means! It's like everyone got this manual on attraction at birth except me. 😅
I get that attraction is subjective or whatever but sometimes it feels like I'm missing out on this huge part of life that everyone else seems to be experiencing effortlessly. Friends have told me stories where they meet someone and suddenly it's like everything clicks - fireworks go off in their heads or something crazy like that. Sounds kinda intense if you ask me but also kinda intriguing. I mean, do people actually feel this magical connection just from seeing another person? Seems almost unreal.
I've thought maybe I'm just a late bloomer or too focused on other stuff like work and hobbies to notice anyone special. But then again, wouldn't I have felt something by now if it was going to happen? My buddies keep saying it'll hit me eventually and I'll know when it does but when exactly is eventually? Waiting around for something you've never experienced feels weirdly unsettling.
In social gatherings or events where others are pairing up left and right, I'm usually the one who's hanging back trying to understand what makes someone attractive in the first place. It's not that I don't appreciate aesthetics or a good personality; it's more that nothing hits home with enough force to pull my attention beyond friendship level. Maybe media has hyped this whole attraction game up too much? Like I've set unrealistic standards based on rom-coms when reality's way more nuanced?
At times it bugs me enough to make me question my own approach towards relationships altogether - am I doing something wrong here? Should there be more urgency in finding someone or should I just let things be as they are until nature decides otherwise? Honestly still figuring all of this out.
