the rain keeps hitting my window and it just makes me feel so alone. I moved here to start fresh, cut off from my friends, and now I’m just stuck in this place where I don’t belong. everyone thinks rain is calming or whatever but to me, it’s just a reminder of how isolated I feel. I thought making friends would be easy but it’s like trying to break through a wall. every time I try to talk to someone, I just end up feeling more awkward and out of place.

I miss laughing with my old friends. now it’s like I’m in a social maze where I can’t even find the way out. simple conversations feel so complicated. I can’t figure out the unspoken rules here. sometimes it feels like I’m shouting into a void and nobody hears me. I want to fit in but I feel like I’m just floating on the outside looking in.

I read somewhere that accepting yourself is the first step to change but honestly, how can I accept myself when I just want people to like me? it’s so frustrating. I want to be real but I’m scared of being rejected. do I have to pretend to be someone I’m not just to be accepted? I just wish I could find a place where I could be myself. it’s exhausting trying to figure all of this out while feeling so out of place.

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