can't stop crying
The story
I thought I was all good. It's been years since my uncle passed and I got over it, or so I thought. But then yesterday, I'm going through some old boxes in the attic right? And there it was: a photo of him at one of our family BBQs. Goddamit, that hit me like a ton of bricks; no lie, I just broke down. Tears flooding out...there's no better way to say it. It's like all this buried grief just came screaming back up to the surface. Felt like getting sucker-punched by memory lane.
Seriously though, how does that even happen? You think you're fine and then boom: a picture's got you crying your eyes out for hours. My chest was heavy, breathing felt tight... all those repressed memories just clawing their way out and seeing daylight again after years of being locked up tight. Ridiculous as it sounds, in that moment it felt like he had just died yesterday. So maybe it's never truly settled? Maybe we tell ourselves we're good when really we aren't 'cause it's more convenient to move on.. That's what grown-ups do, right? But man...it sucks realizing you've been fooling yourself while actively tip-toeing around grief.
