Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 112

yeah,im back again..and well its me and this same boy...

me and him been together for 7 months..and it was secret.

im never allowed to date..yeah...but i did like him alot.even tho i was getting in trouble in process.

its a long distance.we go to diffrent schools...see eachother 1 time a month..for a few days...then its back to me going away...

you see my mum as a place where we go,and his mum has a place...i live w my dad and so does he...so my mum and us goes to her place like once a month.

ok ok...so its been normal..nun really..but recently i go in trouble. thats when my mum almost beat me to death.

i was talking to him in a shop..and that person who owns the shop lied and told my uncle shit about me,well stank up my name.

{the shop owners dad sexually harassed me,so she wanted revenge for her dad}

i know im wrong for going in that shop..but it had something i needed there...where the other places didn't had...so me n my cousin went...then we saw him..we met him in their...our eyes met we laughed and talked...but little did i know i was gonna be in a lot of trouble.]

i did. i did get yelled at when my mum found out i talked to a boy...yet alone went by that shop...i know im wrong...and everyone says shit bout me now..bad person..lair...this that,i hide it ..ok?

yeah so i cried. cried..got frustrated..my aunt kept mocking me about it...but why does she always has to? yes i gets she is looking out for me..its not like im gonna get pregnant...i know what i'm doing...

he knows how my family is...how strict,messy..an yeah i risk it for him....for love.

he makes me feel something i can't feel..he sees the best in me when everyone sees something else...his smile is adorable...-

he makes me giggle,heh-... i love him yeah....but im getting hurt alot in process...im in thin tread...i could get beat to death from my mum...and trust me it almost happened....

i love him alot...but im hurting myself more in process...i don't wanna end it...but i fear to keep it...i love him alot...and its not like everyday we see eachother...again its long distance...so...its-....i dunno...i cry bc im frustrated...mums disappointed...i just need a break...and help...my grandma says i can speak to him,its nothing...i-...i just need...i just want his hugs and kisses...i love him..and i know..well..think that he loves me alot more..<3

I love my parents like most kids. I’m 13, female. My mom, she’s strict but sweet. She always tries her best despite being tight on money, my dad is always there for me to talk to whether it’s about something stupid or deep concepts. My dad is silly and fun and while my mom is more laid back and strict on me I know she loves me and wants the best for me. They’re not bad parents but what’s really affecting me is their divorce. They’re got divorced a while ago, about 3 years now I think. Ever since then they still live in the same apartment, it’s my mom but my dad stays here. I don’t know why I think money reasons. Either way my dad gets really bad mood swings and easily gets angry. He’s also a bit paranoid I will admit. Recently my mom said we have to get our passports done again so we can go see my grandpa and in case I have any upcoming trips as I go into highschool. My dad for some reason was not happy about that. Usually they argue over text. While I’m still upset and can clearly tell when they’re fighting at least they keep it out of the hearing of me and my sister. It’s gone years since their last argument out loud. Today broke it. My dad yelled at my mom when she asked if he’d bring me to my tour of the highschool before my graduation. He said she was making him out to be a bad parent because he didn’t want to go and somehow that spiraled into how he didn’t want to get our passports done. He thinks my mom would take me in my sister away. She would never. I don’t know their thoughts but I KNOW my mom would never do that. They were yelling. It hurts to hear them yell. I wanted to cry but there’s nowhere I can be alone to cry because I share a room with my sister so I took a shower to cry in there. I was worried, am worried. Not about me. More about my parents and even more for my sister. She’s currently 10. She was 6 or 7 I think when she witnessed my parents get into their first and only physical fight, which was the breaking point of their marriage. It had been rough before then but that was what broke it. They had been screaming at each other and my dad accidentally pushed my mom into our room. I had been holding my sister on my bed and covering her ears, I was scared but I was more scared for her. I didn’t want her to have to hear that. But I only had two hand, not four and I couldn’t cover her eyes like I wanted. She was crying and she managed to break away to get to my mom and dad who weee struggling against each other. I was scared before and even more scared then. She was in the danger so I ran over and pulled her back so maybe she wouldn’t accidentally get hit. Ever since then whenever my parents fought out loud I’ve always been scared for her. How she felt, how would this effect her? I don’t even know if it does affect her, she always looks so neutral, maybe she’s used to it because she grew up in it. Either way I’m scared for her. I’m scared for my parents. I’m scared that they’re really going to break it off, that I’ll have to be moved around every couple days on a schedule between houses to be with them. I’m scared that it might get physical again. They’re divorced but they’re still living together, there’s nothing to stop that. If that happens could me and my sister not be able to see our dad again? Would the court think he’s not fit to be around us. I love my dad. I’m scared, so scared.

so well when I was a kid I had a dad and he will always hurt my mom I never like her seen in pain by my dad.. I tried to help her but she push me away and didn't do anything until one day she decind to go the boxing and I was proud of her but then that when she change she became rude like my dad and I was scared and when I started to grow up even more things got different my sister who's was born was 2015 she was a rude to me a lot and nice but she always used to lie to my mom and dad that I did something it hurt me too much and I was getting pare with my older sister that she was pretty sweet nice kind .always got A's on her test/grades I wanted to be like her but I just let everyone down I am a stupid daugther who does nothing right I always get called annyoin rude a bitch and whore and miskat why do I have to be like this so I did the worst thing but before I will you guys I used to scrach my neck and made it into a cross it stranded for me something that I did bad anwyas back to the aprate soo well what I did bad was sh (self harm) I did it all over my body I didn't know what do to then my mom found out and too me to theryp... and they wanted me to get send to a mh (mentle hospiled ).....

My parents are really too in my business, yet not enough.

They are such hypocrites, saying this and doing another, thinking it doesn't apply to them because they're adults.

One time, I didn't want to wear the dress my mother chose for me for a party and she slapped me, grabbed my hair, pulled me and told me to pack my things and get out (I was 14).

Today, my father asked me to put my creme on (bcs of my eczema), I put the recommended amount (and the amount said in the instructions) on and told me to put some more even though it could give me rashes and itchiness all week. He started yelling at me for being too "stupid", even though the instructions were in French, the doctor who gave me the instructions spoke French and guess what? The frigging pharmacy who gave me recommendations spoke French. HE DOESNT SPEAK FRENCH. My mother sided with him, like the "good wife" she is. They expect "respect" yet they aren't decent human beings.

I have good grades at school, not to please, but to have a good future and run away from home the minute I get a steady income. (I'm 15 btw).

Plz 8gnore typos

Dumping my feelings here so I do t tell someone I know smth I'll regret

R

I feel so tired and stil like idk I feel like absolute shit each day, my mind feels foggy and I think I have adhd but I can't get it diagnosed and it's wrecking my school life. I love been friend with one girl for like a year and a half and we were so close but she horridly impacted my health mentally or maybe I was always gonna be like this. I feel like in not actually close to any of my friend and I'm not very well liked. My friendships keep falling apart on my end and I feel like shit. Every friendship I enter in already thinking Aby when it's gonna end bc I've lost almost all my friendships

I'm constantly stressed abt my money for no reason and I feel bitter when I see my friend being able to spend money without feeling crippling guilt and even eating feels like a waste I don't wanna be a burden to .y family especially my mom and I think I can be a bad sister or daughter By grades keep slipping and I can pull myself together to fix it

I to8ght I was getting g better but I've started slipping again and I've been considering cat scratches ifykyk and I dunno why I'm doing g this anymore I wanna be in phycaitry bit I'm not smart enough to get into mrd school. Other than that people keep asking me to decide what I wanna do jn the future but I'm a ducking kid and I don't god damm know what I wanna do if the future Some of my friends ds (the 1year frie d) vents to me about her issues but I can't help but think that she's kinda got it goof and why can she vent but u can't without changing how people see me? I wanna help her but it took so much out of me. I care about her vut I find myself hating g her sometime I I hate myself for it and lots other sikt that I can't write anymore

I don’t kno when it started exactly. Maybe it was innocent at first, just little jokes, casual convos, a few laughs here and there. But now, I feel like there’s somthing more, something I don’t really wanna admit to myself. I’m a married man, been with my wife for years, we built a life together, and I still love her—I really do. But lately, there’s this thing with my coworker, and I can’t ignore it. It’s not like I’m doing anything, not really. We just talk a lot, joke around, sometimes she texts me after work about random stuff. And I know it’s harmless—I mean, we don’t touch, we don’t cross any big lines. But if it’s all so harmless, then why do I feel guilty? Why do I delete some of our messages before I get home? Why do I think about her when I’m laying in bed next to my wife?

I keep tellin myself it’s not cheating, because there’s no actual act, no betrayal in the way people usually think about it. But then I wonder… if the roles were reversed, if I saw my wife laughing with some guy at her job the way I do with this coworker, if she was gettin texts late at night, if she was goin out of her way to look just a little bit nicer when she knew she’d see him—would I be okay with that? No. No way. And that’s the part that’s messing with me. I know I’m playing with fire, even if it’s just a tiny spark right now. Maybe nothing will ever happen, maybe it’ll just stay this light, playful thing. But what if it doesn’t? What if one day I cross a line I can’t uncross? What if I already have, and I just don’t wanna admit it?

I tell myself that it’s natural, that everyone flirts a little, that it doesn’t mean anything. I mean, just because I enjoy talking to her, just because I look forward to seeing her, just because my heart beats a little faster when she compliments me—that doesn’t make me a bad guy, right? Maybe I’m just craving attention in a way I didn’t realize before. Marriage is great, but after years together, it’s easy to feel… unnoticed. My wife and I are comfortable, we have our routines, and I know she loves me, but sometimes it doesn’t feel new anymore. But this coworker? She laughs at my jokes like they’re actually funny, she notices little things about me, she makes me feel like I still got that charm. And damn, it feels good to feel wanted.

But then the guilt creeps back in, and I start wonderin—is flirting cheating? I know what the “right” answer is, what people say it is. But in reality? It’s not always so black and white. Because it’s not just about what you do, it’s about what you feel. And if I’m already feeling this guilty, maybe I already have my answer. Maybe I just don’t wanna face it.

I don’t know how people do it. Like, just live without constantly feeling like they’re behind on everything. I spent years studying, working my ass off to get a degree, telling myself it would all be worth it in the end. But now that I’m finally starting my career, I feel like I missed everything else. I see people my age who are already settled, married, some even have kids, and here I am—just getting started, but already exhausted. I don’t even know if I made the right choices anymore. I wanted this, right? A good job, stability, a future. But what’s the point if I have no one to share it with? Every day, I wake up, go to work, come home, eat alone, sleep, and do it all over again. And yeah, I know, “It takes time,” “You’re still young,” blah blah blah. But when does it actually start feeling good? When does it stop feeling like I’m just surviving instead of living?

The worst part is, I want a family. I want love, I want kids, I want a home filled with something real. But it feels like an impossible dream now. Dating is a joke. Either guys don’t take me seriously, or they’re already settled with someone else. And then there’s the career part—if I do find love, if I do get pregnant, what happens to my job? I worked too hard to lose everything just because I want a family. But I also don’t want to wake up at 45 and realize I waited too long, that I let my best years slip away because I was too scared to make a move. I see women balancing it all, and I wonder how the hell they do it. I can barely keep myself together, let alone raise a whole child. And what if it never happens? What if I really do end up alone forever? No husband, no kids, just a job that doesn’t care if I exist outside of my work email. The thought of that keeps me up at night, makes my chest feel tight, makes me wonder if this is just how life is supposed to be for me. And if it is? Then depression sucks.

And what makes it worse? The fact that no one really gets it. People say “just put yourself out there” like it’s that easy, like I can magically force myself to meet the right person when I barely even have the energy to get through the day. They tell me to “enjoy being single”, but what if I don’t? What if I don’t want to spend my weekends third-wheeling my married friends or pretending to have fun at social events just to feel like I belong somewhere? I keep scrolling through pictures of people my age, smiling with their babies, celebrating anniversaries, moving forward in life, while I feel completely stuck. And the worst part is, I don’t even know how to fix it. I can’t just quit my job to chase love, and I can’t force love to happen just because I want it to. So what am I supposed to do? Just wait? Just keep hoping something changes while I feel like I’m running out of time? Because right now, it feels like no matter what I do, I’m always too late for everything that actually matters.

So I dated a guy in my first year of uni, and we broke up kind of mutually trueing summer break as we were living in different places for summer jobs and I felt like I needed time to figure out who I was (I was 18, who doesn’t). Me, him, and this other girl were quite good friends in first year, she was my best friend. In the fall I got a feeling she was maybe hooking up with him.

Also a bone to pick with my ex: he said one time that girls and guys can’t be friends outside of romantic partnerships. I had then asked him about said female friend to which he said she was the exception (while we were dating). I didn’t ask but after working on homework one night, I left her apartment and she texted me to come back because she was upset. She told me she hooked up with my ex, but it was just a one time thing no feelings involved. I’m hurt that she didn’t tell me before that it was a thing. I learn later from mutual friends that it has been going on for weeks at this point many times. We spent a lot of time alone together so there was definitely times to tell me. I was hurt that she didn’t tell me, then lied to me then didn’t care. To make things worse we are in the same program so are together in every class.

After this I swear she’s trying to be me. I change my Instagram profile pic to a picture of me as a baby, and she did the same right after. She would show my friends music of artists she thought they’d like, but they were artists I introduced her to. She liked one of my travel Instagram account pictures that she didn’t follow, months after we stopped talking (there are 10 people that like pics on that account) compared to hundreds on my main. She just makes me mad now. They didn’t date for the first while hooking up bc he didn’t want a relationship but eventually she gave him a we’re dating or ending this thing. So they’re dating now, and have dated longer than me and him did.

Also quite a while later in the future, my ex messages me a reel (they’re still dating). Not the weirdest thing but he hadn’t in like 8 months. And she also would not love him messaging me. We hadn’t spoken at all for a long time. And it happened to be on the day we started dating. I feel like there is a slim chance he remembers that but it was weird. Anyways, thanks for listening.

Like genuinely I’m really starting to believe the whole ‘it’s really about the mindset’ thing like going into manifesting and all like IM in control with what I do with my life.. so I just have a couple stuff to ask about manifesting??

< attraction vs detachment vs assumption which is better??

< so manifesting is all about the mind and what u believe in so I don’t really have to do all that affirmations?

< like genuinely how can I make my mind believe something that isn’t there?

hello..as by now i don't know where this is gonna go..end up?...but i wanna share what im going true....

me and my mum..it always been me an her...she and my dad spilt up before he came back into my life again...i was young...i grew up 8 years without my dad...then i had a little sister before when i was 2....ok ok fastforwad...my dad and mum argue ALOT. like its a house hold hm...so...ya ever heard the saying hurt people hurt people?..yeh...thats exactly what is happening....

back in 2021 i started hanging out with a group of people.....hanging w them made me know that they had problems to...like me...

in 2021 my mum became...physical...often hitting me...calling me names....and all i did was brushing it off..keeping to myself...but things started getting far..over the waters..

i tried . i seeked help ..and got help until 2023 when i got into high school. life was going good..until my mum started again...

she started to pull me down,with what i wear,do or even say...i couldn't say nor tell her anything...so for 2 years i kept it in..dealing with in mentally...lost focus in studies...started cutting again...did it help?..no..it just left scars...even tho sometimes i felt as it did.

i judged myself daily..found out i had pcos...started starving myself to look like models...wanting to be pretty...helping around the house...so i can unless get a good job..but i didn't...

recenlty...it has been hard...i almost got death beat, mum it physical...jus because i talked to a boy....she says she would cuff out my teeth..make it bleed..brake my hand and foot...and if she has to go to jail she would...she said....anything i do is wrong..telling people don't follow my lead..im bad...im this that...but all i am is a girl...a girl that now is getting to explore..do things....i-...i try ...i try so damn hard...and theres so much more i wanna say..so much worse things she did...but i will just share this for now...all i wanna do is take a rest...kill myself?....i dunno...but imma keep cutting for awhile....even tho i been overthinking..getting frustrated....i-...stress...i wanna reach for the waters above...ti breath...but i only feel like im drowing deep below...i try reaching..swimming...but it went futher....

yep..thats all i need to share...for now..i just need some help...mentally and physically...

I am sorry that I'm here again to vent about the same things, but I have nowhere else to go, no one to talk to IRL. No one. I wish that that was an exaggeration- if you haven't seen things I've said before my previous posts (I think others can access them here? I can't tell, if not, oops) they have more detail of things. I just really, really needed this out, especially after an awful day with my doctor trying to take away medication that I need to live. She ultimately didn't, I fought too hard and gave her nothing that would let her, but it was clear she wanted to take everything from me just because I live different. Am different.

Home.

That's all I want, is to be able to sit in my room, or on the couch in a place and know that I'm home. I'm supposed to be here, I have safe people around me, I belong and am wanted here. To not feel like, every second of everyday, every moment I'm just waiting for someone to hurt me in some manner. For the government to do or try to do more to declare me unworthy of life.

I am intersex and trans, the government is trying to kill us off, you cannot deny it. If you genuinely still think you can, you're either blind or evil. Or both.

It is, Trump and his cronies are, trying to kill us. He's declared us not to exist, yet also says we should die, is doing anything in his power to make our very existence in itself a crime when all we want is to be ourselves and to live like everyone else. My state in particular just took trans and intersex people out of the Civil Rights Act, so the moment he would succeed, my life would be forfeit.

I'm mixed race, and look at the act from the 1700s he just enacted, allowing him to deport whoever he wants despite being a citizen declaring them dangerous aliens, create internment camps. Look at it. How long until he imprisons and deports lgbtqia2p people as a whole?

We have seen how this goes before, yet no one is stopping it, there are people outside the US blaming all of the country (even us who have been screaming for help and who screamed for people not to let him win) for it. We are just as culpable to them, so there's no chance we'll be granted asylum if we tried to flee. Not until we're being slaughtered in the streets.

I never really felt at home in this world at all, as a whole, I am going to die a slow and painful death under this regime and there's no way around it. As I said, I'm intersex and trans, also disabled and chronically ill. So many targets on my back. I keep begging for help to get out and everyone just tells me I'm, "not valuable," as a citizen so I need to become it or perish really.

Yes, I've been told straight up I am not valuable- even by other transfolk.

My own community is leaving me (and others like me), in the dust because I'm disabled and intersex, because I need "too much" help. Because I am "too much." Again, actual quote.

I just want to be healthy, figure out what I need to do to feel better, get everything back on track so I can study forensics like I wanted. Either anthropology or psychology. To get the hell out of here, away from the people hurting me (within my home and in the country) and find someone who loves me, who will protect me and vice versa, maybe make the loving family I never got to have. I want to adopt, I am infertile, children with a spouse and maybe run some sort of cat cafe. I don't know. I have so many dreams, so many wants, ranging from quite simple to more complex.

I want to live, and I barely even got to yet, trapped with abusive "family" that deliberately kept me sick and sad and dependent so they could do who knows what. I still don't know what their goal was ultimately.

Why do I have to justify my existence? Why do I have to be valuable to deserve to live, to deserve to smile, to deserve anything? Why do the beliefs of people that think a "loving god" flooded the world just because he was angry at his own creations, who apparently is the god of mercy yet wants to kill anyone who doesn't believe in him, matter more than a living breathing thing people can SEE?

I don't even know what I believe anymore. I was raised Evangelical on my dad's side, Catholic on my mother's, had the rapture shoved down my throat starting age eight and had my aunt try to exorcise me at fifteen or so for clear signs of abuse and just... Being me. Why are the opinions of people like that worth more than lives?

... Home.

I just want to go home, but I don't know if that ever existed for me in the first place, or ever will. I wish so badly I had someone to take me there, someone I trusted to go to for refuge, but I don't.

If it wasn't extremely unsafe and 99.9% likely to end in disaster, I'd start begging random people on the internet from better countries to come and smuggle me there (so to be clear I am NOT DOING THAT I just wish so badly I could get out of here...).

so now I am telling you guys the next part... so I have a best friends that I love so much right well.. we were soo good friend before the issues it was the 6 grade she meets two girls name kimbery and jasmine right well day or week goes by and kimbery leave fanny and jasmine and the thing is fanny treats me like shit.. she mades me like I should die I cant hold it she doesn't like me anymore and she does back to bring friends with Kimberly and there the thing Kim talk shit about her I told fanny do not go back to her because she is a bithc who is dating all of her ex and she said so is my life I chounted stop her..so I just let her to that and she said Kim is fake that she is annyroing and shit like bro I didn't do anything I feel lost and I am not tryna cry but she pick her over me she like a ghost to me.

well I have a best friend and a other who long distant so I'ma start with the long distant one so we been best friends for a really long time everything was going good until a girl name adelis came in and bethany started to be dry to me she never been dry to me before and well I found out in the 5 grade that she talk shit about me and bethany and I told bethany and she belived me but then a year ago and I was at my sister game softball and I called my long distants friend and we start talking right and then she show me texted from adelis and making Bethany laugh I stand there shock because she prominse me that she I wounte go back to talk to her and then we start bearly calling and it got me overthinking and well.. Bethany called me and told her friend wants to meet me and well I hate talking to new people but she was nice to me that it wanted to me cry. and she was like Bethany before she meet adelis and then adelis was always rude to me I never like it make me cry because I am sesevetive and I have issuss and Bethany only call me when adelis is in the call and elii and me didn't like it she made us hurt so we just brush it off and we didn't talk to them anymore and shit and Bethany makes joke that makes me bad about my body and makes up excuses to leave me to go call adelis. so is she even my best friend anymore?.....

LIKE BRO LAST WEEK EVERYDAY FELT LIKE A FRIDAY AND I DID MY HAIR ALL BY MYSELFFFFF (wasn’t the best looking but little me would be proud‼️) LIKEEE AHHHH LIFE LAST WEEK WA PEAK🗣️ obviously there were some parts that weren’t ideal but I had them for characters development 😽 like bro and MY POTENTIAL BRO I GOTTA START MAKING CREATIVE DIGITAL PRODUCTS- frfr also anyone have animated shows/comics(not dc or marvel) recommendations?? LIKE I WASNT FEELING ALONE I DONT NEED ANYONE🗣️ WHERE WAS THIS MINDSET DURNING LAST YEAR 2023 nov-dec well speaking of potential anyone know ways of making money online??[as a high schooler] ALSO MORE STUFF LIKE ANYONE KNOW HOW TO STAY CONSISTENT bc last week would have gone so much better if I had workout😿 But I can make this week better by doing stuff💪 can’t lie the only problem I have rn is I can’t get someone out of my mind LIKE THIS MAN WAS MAKING ME ANXIOUS ON THURSDAY WHY?? his shorter than me bro 😭🙏 LITTLE ME WOULD NOT BE HAPPY 🗣️🗣️ anyway that’s alllll PONYBOY‼️‼️

I don’t know when I started asking myself this question so much, but lately, it’s like a constant loop in my head—Am I annoying? I’ve been married to my husband for 15 years, and I swear, sometimes it feels like he’s just tired of me. Not in a dramatic, we-need-to-divorce way, but in a way that makes me feel like I talk too much, like I repeat myself, like I ask too many little questions or bring up too many unimportant things. I’ll be telling him about my day, something small that happened, and I see it—that slight change in his face, the way his eyes shift away, the little sigh, like he’s waiting for me to finish. And I feel stupid. I feel like I should just shut up, like maybe whatever I was saying wasn’t worth saying in the first place. And I don’t think he even realizes he does it, which somehow makes it worse. Because if he noticed, maybe he’d at least pretend better. Maybe he’d reassure me, tell me I’m not annoying, that he still wants to hear what I have to say. But he doesn’t. He just listens—barely—and moves on, like I was just background noise. And I try not to let it get to me, but it does.

It’s not just him, either. I notice it everywhere now. With friends, with coworkers, even with strangers sometimes. I’ll say something and immediately second-guess myself. Did I talk too long? Did they actually care, or were they just being polite? Am I making people uncomfortable by taking up too much space? It’s like I’ve developed this sixth sense for when someone loses interest, and the moment I feel it, I just want to shrink, to disappear, to take back whatever I just said and pretend I never opened my mouth. And I hate that. I hate that I’ve started filtering myself so much, cutting my own stories short, apologizing for talking too much when no one even said I was. But maybe they thought it. Maybe I could see it in their face, hear it in the way they respond with those short little "mhmm"s or "yeah, totally"s, like they’re just waiting for their turn to talk, or worse, waiting for the conversation to be over. And then I start overthinking everything. Maybe this is why I don’t have as many close friendships as I used to. Maybe this is why people drift away. Maybe I’ve been exhausting to be around this whole time, and I just never noticed before.

I don’t know how to fix it. Or if it even needs fixing. Maybe it’s all in my head. Maybe I’ve just become so insecure about my place in people’s lives that I think I’m annoying when I’m really not. But what if I am? What if I’ve spent years talking too much, over-explaining, repeating myself, not realizing that everyone was just putting up with me? The idea of that makes me want to stop talking altogether. To just keep everything inside, because at least then I wouldn’t have to see that look on people’s faces ever again. But then what? I go silent, I stop sharing, and then one day, I realize no one even notices? That scares me just as much. So I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I’m annoying, if I should change, or if I just need to stop caring so much. But I do care. And I don’t know how to turn that off.