Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 62

I have been battling depression, anxiety and undergoing treatment for almost nine months. Initially, I resisted medication but now I take it mechanically..with little difference except for the discomfort when switching medications.

My condition fluctuates. A while ago i tried to change mindset pushing myself to live well work hard so my family could have a better life but there is no improved at all…

Since the first day i entered the workforce i have faced suppression and lack of recognition even in my personal relationships….life has never shown my mercy.

Honestly, im exhausted..there has been countless times when i just wanted to end everything it feels like nothing truly want has ever been within my reach. No matter how hard i try or how positive i remain fate and live seems to always work against me.

While other’s lives keep getting better mines only go from bad to worse. My family struggles to afford food and as their child I feels myself useless to help them.

The guy I like—his r dislikes me because my family is poor..he even assumes that I like his son just because he is the boss’s son….

I’m already 32 years old, life likes completely messed.

How am I supposed to keep going?….i feel tired for all of this..

I REALLY DONT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU HAVE your own ideas and requirements but don’t say them upfront. You wait until I’ve completed everything and then demand a full revision of my work.

From the start, it was agreed that I would be fully responsible for designing this website. But now that I’ve designed it, you keep insisting on changes. And then you tell me that if I had scheduled a meeting earlier, none of these issues would have happened.

You were the one who asked me to design it, and now you’re the one saying it doesn’t look good. In the end, you also want everything done according to your exact preferences. Why the hell didn’t you just lay out your design from the beginning? Now that I’ve done all the work, you want it entirely your way!

I really hate it when people keep their ideas to themselves and only start nitpicking after I’ve already done the work. If you’re so great at it, do it yourself! Damn it!

I must have been out of my mind to agree to be your business partner!

So I am a 12th grade student. I am 17 and my bf is 19. He was my senior. And everyone in my school are jealous of my relationship. Our receptionist told my mom that I am going out with him. My mom didn't believe her much but one day she doubted that I may have something, so they unlocked my phone with my fingerprint when I was sleeping and checked everything. The chats, the photos. It became a big issue pretty soon and both our families talked and asked us to end it. Their main problem was not our age but that we belonged to different castes. Soon he got sent to a hostel and I stayed back in our city as I am still in my highschool. Everytime I go out, my parents doubt that I may meet someone, not him, but maybe someone else. As if I am a slut who maintains a new guy every month. And the girl who got rejected by my bf along with her chapri gang started spreading rumours that me and him slept together. That bitch even told my teachers the same. And damaged my reputation. I got sick and she wished I would die. And now she comes showing false concern. And from the moment this issue happened, I lost interest in my studies and basically everything. From straight A's student to someone who barely gets pass marks. Boards are 10 days away and all I want to do is cry and sleep, or die. The torture is just too much

first of all, i dont actually have any really bad problems so you dont have to feel bad for me.

I feel like me friendships end up the same alot of the times, by them treating me badly, for example this one friend group im apart of is the kind where everyone is cussing about eachother but we all know we are joking most of the time, but then when there is actually some drama im apart of, i know what would hurt a person but i just dont wanna do that and they just say the most bad thing about me. I feel like almost everyone friend group im apart of is this kind of where everyone is always shittakking eachother but j just want to be apart of one where everyone respects eachother, of course a joke sometimes is completely ok but im so tired of constantly getting shitted on. Why do people always stab so much where it hurts? Do they not know, or do they do it on purpose. This had happend to me in 3 friend groups and im starting to feel like its problem on my side, im thinking for some time i fould be having paranoid personality disorder, should i talk to a psychiatrist? Is it my fault? Please, i will value advice

PS: also sorry if its quite chaotic

Hey, I am a mother of a toddler and a business partner (of course with my husband) and WIFE to my husband. we are together 24/7 everyday dealing all the tasks of work and home.... I am lacking fun. Thanks to my bad childhood and the most nagging and control freak mother i never had a real friendship. That is still the case and i am not able to establish friendly relationship with anyone. Literally i am with a company all day around. To be honest my hubby is a 90% good guy but miser in terms of fun or romance. to give you context, i never had any gift from him in my 12 years of togetherness. when i am feeling utterly lonely even when accompanied - in terms of fun or having a life at all... am getting frustrated and i am starting to fight with him over small insignificant matters and things become more worse, i become more stressed and back to work life routine. I feel trapped. I do not have any company for the fun part of my life. I am desperately lonely in terms of a friend with whom i could share and just have a casual no tasky or businessy or home matter conversation. I am stuck, stressed and more than anything, i am angry at myself. To be honest, i do not know how to be happy with just myself.

At this point, I don't know what to do. I just want help, school is really getting to me, and it makes me feel like I'm pathetic or something. My family thinks it's just cause I'm lazy, and don't want to do the work, but I'm really just trying to deal with my mental health at the moment and it feels like it's only getting worse. I really just want help, and don't want to go to school, I end up crying every morning because of it, I don't have friends, and I realized I get distracted in class by how much people are in the room and can't help but feel like everyone talks behind my back, or looking at me. This probably takes place from when I got bullied in elementary school, they all talked behind my back, and I had to sit outside beside the classroom while they were talking about me, right beside me. I thought giving one of them money would make them closer to me but she ended up being the one that started talking behind my back first. I started homeschooling because of it, for a couple years, and moved to a different school. I don't know what to do with me life, I can't help but feel no one gaf about me, and they'll only care if I'm gone. I have lots of trouble making friends, and interacting with people, I have one person who makes me feel seen, and like they care, he's super sweet, he makes me feel like a person, and makes me wanna become a better person. But for now I don't know what to do. It's the same cycle, where I end up in a really depressed sate for a whole week, then feel better, then depressed all over again, I just want help

I'm 22, a guy. I've had 5 proper friendships in my life.

First and second one in school, after I moved states. They lasted around 10 years until I got into a relationship. They hated my boyfriend, so I got ghosted and blocked everywhere.

Third was a girl in the city i live in now, after I moved out from my parent's house. We got along until she got more and more toxic. She was 18 at the time, she acted like a spoiled 13 year old. Insulted, bullied and humiliated others. I quit that frie4ndship. She stalked me for 9 months.

Fourth was with an ex of mine, after a year of being apart we got to talk again. He's a nice guy. I adore him, in a very platonic way. He's been ghosting me for 2 months now for no reason.

Last one just broke apart today. A friend of 6 years told me about his struggles. I've been there for him for weeks now since he was feeling bad, but i ran out of tips and tricks. Ran out of solutions, so i simply suggested he'd go back to his therapist, that's what she's there for after all. He ignored me for the day and then started insulting me, calling me names, and much worse. I blocked him.

22 years. and not a single lasting friendship because all people turn out to hate me, ghost me or be toxic. I'm giving up on friendship.

its like no one understands me or my struggles. sounds like im a pick me but its true. ive got no one to talk to, to trust. everyone would tell the nearest asshole about how "emo" i am for my struggles. my country does not take self harm well. youd get called out in your schools hallways or get called emo constantly. most adult tell you youre seeking attention and ignore your struggles. i constantly self harm. it calms me down seeing the blood drip from my arms. i have always loved blood, i dont know why. ive always intentionally made myself bleed to drink it. or just to look at it. maybe its cause my experience with hostpitals from a young age. my sister got terminally sick when i was 5. i was in and out of school to visit her. she went to hostpitals all over the country. my family once forgot me in a hostpital. but ive been there so much that i practically knew my way around. nurses were always sweet and kind. always had a look of pity because of my sister. they knew she would never make it. maybe people would understand a litle if they knew my whole story. but no one ever looks at the big picture. they just look at the ugly parts AND THEN HAVE THE AUDACITY TO JUDGE YOU. i hate people, idc if this gets rejected atleast someone read it if it did.

I, 14F, live in a household with my dad, 52M, and my little brother, 11M, who suffers from developmental disabilities (one of the types of autism). My sister, 19F, has moved away for university. Both my sister and I agree that getting away from our family by graduating is the best and most pacifistic solution. Growing up, my mom (I don't remember how old she was and is) was both physically and mentally abusive. She left a lot of issues for me to handle. Technically, she is the reason why I hate myself, body and soul, in this day and age. I found myself at 9 years old, begging my dad to divorce my mom, thinking that everything would be over. Guess what? My dad had to see his father dying from COVID-19, and TWO WHOLE MONTHS LATER, after lots of incidents, he filed a restraining order and a divorce. Of course, he had to see his children crying and begging him on their feet to do it. Yeah, of course, I had to see my newly bought clothes by my godmother with scissors because my mom and godmother/aunt were beefing at that time. Of course, my mom had to pull me by the shirt and drag me upstairs because she found me eating at my aunt's when she refused to cook for a whole week. I was just thankful that my mom would go away. Long story short, the court drives weren't amazing. The judges would side with my mom and use false information against us. I was just a kid, and the judge was treating me like a middle-aged criminal. Anyway, people started seeing the truth, and my dad won custody of all three kids. We live in a small village therefore everything is easily shared. Today, my dad is kind of... overprotective. Which eventually becomes unnecessarily annoying and very disturbing. I never actually had a boyfriend until I met Kanye on Instagram. He is three years older than me. I've been rejected twice (to be honest, kind of harshly since the last guy threw my card to someone I hated because they made dirty jokes about me and then said that I'd probably have a chance with the dirty guy instead), and I didn't give much thought because I liked him. We were in a relationship for two and a half months. Until my dad found out and went berserk. He deleted my Instagram accounts and blocked all my apps on my phone through parental control. I eventually broke up with Kanye because my dad threatened to fly to Kanye's home country and file a restraining order against him. I had to break up with the one guy I could talk freely about my situation without being judged and the only guy that loved me for me and not for my talents to brag about. I'm seriously debating life at this point. Kanye kept me alive. Now Kanye has to go. What's left? Nothing. What does my dad do to help? Make everything worse. "I don't have a favorite kid," he says as he suggests that my brother will use MY PHONE to watch YouTube because my brother's phone was out of battery. Yeah, okay, my brother has autism, I respect that. But god damn it. If you're going to use it like that, you're just not cool. I have trouble waking up because even my nightmares are better than this. I can't even pick up my ass to do basic things like shower or eat. But in my dad's mind, I'm just lazy. I don't want to keep living at this point. As my mom once said, "It should have been you instead of my miscarriage the year before your birth". Man, I know, it really should have.

I thought that my brother was favored over me. My parents, my grandparents, and even my relatives. Now, it seems like I'm right. I felt horrible after all the years I spent trying and trying to get them to look at me. But who thought that he would bring me more trouble? It all started when my brother started to fight and yell at my parents when he hit puberty. I guess I'm more sensitive to sounds or conflicts since I was crying every night they fought. I just hated all the noise and the words that they spat out at each other. I didn't say a single word to my parents because I feared I would make them angrier. I said everything I felt to my friends, which later caused them to distance themselves. I was too naive to know that they were just young kid like me, not a therapist. After about 2 years of all the noise, I finally told my father I couldn't bear it anymore. My father was concerned after hearing about what I said, and I started to go to a nearby hospital for therapy and pills. But that didn't help. It only made me feel dull and empty, making my hands shakier. The pills didn't help at all. I started to cut myself, but I always ended up panicking and calling my dad for help. I was about 13 years old when I started that. Venting to my friends caused some trouble, and I ended up pushing everybody away from me. I was alone. After they left, I realized that I needed them more than anything. I started to leave school early or skip school for weeks. I even went into the psych ward, but only for about a month and a few weeks. However, that didn't stop my parents and my brother from yelling at each other. I was barely surviving. I spend the next 3 years in the same situation. Now, I'm a high school student in my country, with nothing much being different. A few days ago, my brother got into one of the top-rated universities here. This holiday was a living hell for me. He was smiling and bragging like an idiot. I hate him. How could he be so egoistic when he had torn my life into pieces? I had to go through all of that. I had to lose the people I loved the most, hurt myself, and think that everything happened because of me, like he said. I was a fool to notice that my brother was the problem. I can't even hate him because there's a stupid part of me that's saying that I shouldn't. Only because he's my brother. Because he's family. Even when he doesn't treat me like I'm his younger sister or like a person that's equal to him. I wish I was never here. I wish I wasn't his sister or my parent's daughter. I wish I could be somebody else.

My brain tells me I'm a terrible person who doesn't deserve to be happy. It has been like this for a long time. I know its not rational but it doesn't stop it from feeling true and interfering with my life. For example, I impulsively subscribed to a dating app, I guess because I was lonely and wanted a connection. Anyway I've started chatting to this guy who is really lovely. The healthy and rational part of me would like to see where this goes, but my brain is telling me I don't deserve to be a relationship so I should break it off. I think soon I'm going to break and just ruin this opportunity for myself. I guess its also unfair of me to begin dating when I'm still struggling with this thought process. Plus I have hated myself for as long as I can remember, and as the saying goes, you can't expect someone to love you when you can't love yourself. I don't know what to do.

So I had a surgery 2 weeks ago and since then I keep struggling with complications such as choking and hiccuping specially hiccuping it doesn't stop 24/7 which is ruining my life

There's really no good categories on this things, so I had to pick the closest one.

Today is Mom. Feb. 3, 2025.

My comments/story will probably not make any sense, and it'll probably be a bit all over the place but just bare with me.

Giant unopened lotuses, shrouded in a shadow. Me sorta floating above them. Then I crash through some thick curtains. There's people there. It kinda looked like a grocery store. I was looking at a cookie container with 2 cookies. I ended up eating a purple cake. Not too sure why? I walk around. No one is around. I see that it looks like an apocalypse of some sort. But not the zombie kind. There's this giant white figure in the distance. One of my childhood friends grabs my hand and brings me to some sorta safe place. It's sorta run down, but her boyfriend/fiance was there, my former neighbors were there, and even my mom was there(which in reality, my mom passed away). Anyway, the giant figure in the distance looked like those stereotypical medieval European dragons. Large, white, and winged! It didn't seem to use fire, but it looked like it was having a child's tantrum. I then decided to go for a short walk, since it seemed far enough in the distance. I walked near a lake. I decided to sit down under a tree. Someone else was there, but I couldn't make out who. All I know is that the person next to me was a male. He said he careful and be quiet. His arm points to a certain direction. Two large hornets nests were about 7-8 feet away from us. Why dude was there, I don't know. I freaked out and ran out. Obviously I got stung a bunch of times. I wake up with my arm in a sh*t-ton of pain. No marks on my arm or anything, just sharp pain. But that's normal for me, as I feel everything in my dreams too. Like the sound of the wind, water at my feet, background chatter if there are people, the taste of food or drinks, and the feelings of both pain and pleasure. I feel everything. Which is quite annoying, since I've dreamed of getting shot once. It was very real in my dreams. I was in my mother's car, my mom got shot and got unalived, I got shot in my side and upper right arm. And when I woke up it was excruciatingly painful! Ever dreamed of being surrounded by over 1000 cats... That was one of my dreams once too, and they were so forking fluffy!! Dreams of walking along the sand and picking up a pearl. I've dreamed of a beach that wasn't covered in sand but mini pearls and the ocean was beautiful in that dream, I met a very um... Good looking mer dude in that dream, and he told me to keep a particular shell, the kind you see people blow into and it makes some sorta loud noise. But still. We met near a small archway made of stone. And another dream was more um, dark and scary. But I wasn't the experiencer in that dream, only an observer. I walked through a corridor of many different scenes. From a young blonde boy who was being tortured, to a young woman dangling from the ceiling with thick twine, to crows surrounding a man on a purple velvet couch. And there were many more, it was a pretty scary dream!!

Anyway, I gotta head to the doctors. I'll respond to previous comments from other stories I've shared later.

Bye-bye👋🏻😊!!

In the story I'll be using nicknames, im yellow and im trans masc and gay, my boyfriend will be orange and hes bisexual, his friend will be red and hes also bisexual. (side note ive only been in one other really toxic relationship)

Ive been dating my bf for not too long and ive known hes had his long distance friend who i thought would "jokingly" flirt with because red had a crush on orange but awhile ago idk what we were talking about but orange brought up poly and and said "its unfair for him because you confussed to be, im sure he wouldve befire we even met if he wasnt so shy" and when he said that it made me feel alittle weird but awhile after that when orange and me were on a phone call with red, orange brought being poly with him, ive told orange before im ok with poly just as long as its not one-sided, when he asked me on a call with red i panicked alittle and said sure because even though i really don't mind i felt alittle guilted into it because i have a hard time doing something that'll upset someone, now im stuck in a relationship or what ive been told is one, i was at his house not to long ago and orange was on a call with red, i really didnt mind it at all sense reds very sweet and if he liked me back would be a great boyfriend but he only likes orange, the whole time orange was on call with red it felt like he didn't even know i was there other than the few times he'd complain i wasnt close enough or paying too much attention to my phone even though id just be sitting there sense none of them would talk to me just each other and now I'm left with a boyfriend who talks about feeling so happy to have two loving boyfriends and talks only about red to me while im stuck with half of the affection id get from my boyfriend, a random person i cant even call my boyfriend dating my boyfriend, and a bomb dropped on me that hes purposely flirted with red even when we startes dating without even knowing if id be comfrtable especially sense red has a crush on him. Am I a place holder or is he bored of me?

2/2/25 2:19pm TW: TALK OF SELF HARM

"I feel when i question my skin starts to burn"

"why does my skin start to burn?"

fable - Gigi Perez

I've always struggled with self imagine, how to deal with my emotions and express them in

a healthy way.

Growing up i never viewed myself as beautiful and if i did it was cause i had a full face.

Growing up i never viewed my body as beautiful either.

I learned to starve myself, but why the effort if i was going to binge? but than again i was bulimic.

I fell in love with self imagine at roughly 8? sexualizing myself to get a chance at some sort of affection

"do you send?"

It felt good to be validated to dress cute, to be looked at...they paid attention even seemed to care.

Growing up my mom was an addict, she'd often choose her male partners over me, never cared about how i myself fell into addiction, how i was struggling to keep it together everyday.

I means you told me yourself you knew i was dabbling in drugs, hurting myself...hurting.

My dad had passed on earlier in my life so it was me and my half siblings.

I've come accustomed to being alone, I've grow comfortable with my own presence.

I can grow "lonely" often times, but I'd probably use the word yearning, yearning for connection more like conversation.

I often avoid people, groups, it doesn't really matter i just often seclude myself as much as possible, its like a back and forth battle between being alone and needing a spirit, in the end I'm usually alone by choice of course..

I found myself changing my appearance every week, my hair, makeup, style, opinions occasionally personality.

i wish i could explain myself fully, thoroughly, i need to be understood at least once i need to be heard even seen.

Eventually i thought i had tried everything, and well of course i wasn't satisfied i will never be. I'd learned what self harm was and so i had began from fifth grade to last year, I'm proudly clean though its a daily struggle to push the thoughts and urges away, I'm clean.

To feel the blade against my skin, the world seem comfortably quiet as my heart slows and my worries fade until due time.

I fallen in love with the pain the beauty of my scars. Actively engaging in self harm while being surrounded by people struggling with the same issue was difficult, i felt competitive and envious of people who had "better look scars" than mine, deeper ones, i wanted so badly to be validated to be loved thoroughly.

When i think back to those years i feel overwhelming with sorrow, i wish i had a me those years ago i needed me more than i needed anybody and yet all i could offer myself was cruel treatment and hurtful words. i didn't think I'd make it to 18, yet here i am in the flesh.

I have grown so much as a spirit and yet the only person who may care, who fully knows is me. Sometimes i forget I'm somebody too a being with opinions, motives, thoughts, and feelings.

I'm learning how to love what i see to accept it...me utterly.

I've developed a mindset, i have no competition, not in a "everyone else is ugly" type of way but i simply have no one to compare myself to.

On another note not only have i grown, so has me and my moms relationship, it started with her getting clean.