Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 90

its been a long time since i've realizd but i think i am fully admitting to my myself this just now that i've certainly become a failure. last time i was preparing for my exams with full enthusiasm and now that i am a 11th grader my whole life is fucking turned upside down. i ha dstarted on this ourney of preparing for an entrance exam for engineeering colleges but took the option of staying at my school which usualy doing the same thing as me (preparing for the same exam) dont do. i was confident in proving the people who toold me that staying in school won't get you your college. i was confident. because i had no one to tell me the right thing. no one to explain to me what i was setting myself up for. i was just a person with dreams who'd not thoroughly thought of the path that they'd be taking neither had they researched about this. they just took this path because it seemed cool and many people were doing it and also heard that there father's dream was to get the top college that you could get through this exam. i didnt know anything about it and just followed whatever others around me were doing. i didnt realize the seriousness of this thing. and dint give me best which i am still far from giving. i scores very well in ast year's exam that i told you about however i could do more on that too if i were just a little more serious. os now i have wasted my 2024 not studying in my school. when i look at the more serious kids around me theyre so fucking ahead of me i cant even imagine that id ever be at their level i just think i am done for and now i dont have the fucking motivation to do anything. i cant study. i just cant bring myself to do it i dont know why i just have gotten so good at procastinating and so good at just regretting things after i did the wronng stuff that i seem to not even care right now. i dont fucking know what to do and i just wanna die right now. also i couldnt bring myself to tell this to anyone despite having so many friends and pretty undertsanding parents but i just cant. and i dont know how this websiete works. i just wanna

Every time my brother and father are left to do things they always do the worst possible things, just today my brother decided to coax my dad into buying a car he can't afford (even with monthly payments) because my brother wanted to co-sign on it, and they keep doing more and more stupid things and it just makes me angry, especially since they're way older then me so I'd expect more from them, though I guess that's stupid to expect.

HE'S SO FINE

How tf do I get over someone?

What I've realized from this man is that you don't always need to have what you want. Yes, I wanted to pursue him in anyway I can, but he made it clear that he didn't wanna talk to me, and that's fine. I have been thinking about so many things that would make our friendship hard anyway. Being trans is who I am and when I asked him about how he felt about trans people, he left me on sent and didn't respond. It wouldn't've been beneficial or wise to my mental health to seek camaraderie in someone like that. While I still think about him and what could've been, I think it's for the best that it remains a mystery.

I love how good I've been feeling recently :)

Being a teenager has shown me that I can be easily replaced by another person. Like in fresh man year of high school, me and our group of five friends (me included.) Was nervous and hoped that we were all atleast together in the classroom. When the week the students in each classroom was announced, two friends from that group was happy that they were together in a classroom. Later on, the other 2 friends were told that they were classmates and were in the same classroom in school. When they noticed I was the one left out, they felt bad. But I knew they were too happy to be with one another than to acknowledge the fact that I was left out. But well, me not wanting to be pitied, I reassured them it was fine and that I can handle being alone. Fast forward in the ending of the first semester, I notices they gradually grew more distant and made other friends, whilst still being together with the friend in the same classroom. One day, after classes were over. Me and my ex-friend (Anna from my first story) went to our usual waiting area to wait to be picked up. We were greeted by my friend in the same group, Rachel. (The same Rachel from my first story.) We haven't seen each other in a couple days, but they've seen each other many times after classes because of tutor lessons. Rachel exclaimed "Anna, I missed youu!" With a joyful smile. When she finally noticed me she just said a regular "oh hii!" Then she noticed that she and Anna see each other everyday and laugh with her. I was watching them with a slight smile, not wanting them to sense my unease. Those days, I saw that the friends I bonded with random stuff, bonded with each other about the stuff they used to bond with me. I rarely talk to all of them through private messages. And I kept to myself, playing my video games to get distracted. Maybe it was my fault they gradually grew distant. Maybe I didn't give them the attention they wanted, but instead gave them the opposite. Maybe- geez.. This is really cringe..

(I haven't talked to them about my feelings since I dont wanna be pitied and force them with the memory of what made my mental health to grow worse.)

I'm not super close with my family but like they aren't bad people. I have no idea if I'm overreacting but it feels like I'm just a stranger hanging out in their house. It's really obvious that they like my brother more which really hurts because I try so much to be the perfect kid and I just can't do it. Once my dad was trying to have a sweet moment with me and he said "I love you (brothers name)". Honestly it really shook me up to realize that they don't even think about me. I have no idea if I'm over reacting but like it feels like they just kinda put up with me.

so i wanted to try and portray a character going through SA in one of my stories that will never see the light of day, so i asked people on reddit (bad idea ik) how to handle it and write it well. basically, i was told that i shouldn't write it if ive never experienced it and what gives me the right to 'educate' people about it. i feel really bad, because i that was never my intention and i never meant to trigger or hurt people and yeah. i just feel really guillty.

(also i wasn't sure what category to put it in so i just put workplace drama)

They say a daughter's first love is her father. Mine was a lesson.

A father is supposed to protect his daughter from the monsters in the world. He was the monster

What scares me so much more, I want to be a mother, but how can i ever trust, the same thing wont happen to my daughter.

Im scared. Im scared i will never trust a man in my life.

Man or Bare?

i chose the bare, because i would rather die than live with trauma for the rest of my life, and i would let the world burn before anything happens to my daughter.

IDK WHAT CATEGORY TO PUT

I have a fetish where I am attracted to (extremely) large individuals. I don't know how I got it, or why I have it; it's just stuck with me, and I hate it. It doesn't let me be attracted to a normal, healthy person and I hate myself for allowing it. Here's the main issue. For most people, they can draw art of this, rp, talk about it, etc, bc they're adults.

I'm not. I'm only 14. Almost every server I've tried to get on to is labeled 18+ in some way. l've tried to be sneaky and apply to a few while lying about my age, but they always find out. In the few servers where I am allowed, it is still mostly adults; making me feel very uncomfortable talking to them at all. I feel alone, because there's no one to help me, or at least live with it alongside me, my age. I’m tired of having something I cannot control define who I am.

I am a 20 year old man in university. I was raised in a religious household and wasn't allowed to date. Despite leaving my religion I have remained single due to the fact that I want to put my life together before getting into a relationship and also I have been struggling with my mental health for the past 2-3 years.

My mental health has improved in some areas however I am struggling with a huge insecurity related to women and it's caused me to become very depressed and suicidal. Just to clarify I don't hate women I just feel really confused and depressed.

A while back I came across many articles and studies that claim that straight women watch lesbian porn. So my question is why do so many "straight" women watch lesbian porn? None of the explanations I've heard make any sense at all and seem like excuses. As a straight man I don't get aroused by watching men kissing or sucking each other's cocks. If women don’t like straight porn because it’s too violent why don’t they watch straight porn that focuses on the woman’s pleasure? It’s not hard to find at all. I looked it up and there are plenty of sensual straight porn that focuses on the woman’s pleasure yet women choose to watch lesbian porn. Again I think the women who say they watch it because “it’s sensual and I like to imagine myself in the woman’s place” are just making excuses and are bisexuals or lesbians in denial. If I as a man said “I get turned on by watching two men kissing and sucking each other’s cocks but I’m 100% straight I just imagine myself in the man’s place” everyone would look at me like I’m crazy and rightfully so. As a straight man I don’t like to watch gay porn and I’m disgusted by it. I watch porn that only has women in it because I am 100% straight and I am not attracted to men at all. Yet women seem to prefer getting off to other women and make excuses that people believe.

I believe that little to no women on this planet are straight and the vast majority if not all are either lesbian, bisexual, or comphet (conditioned by society to be straight but deep down lesbian or bisexual).

I’m a straight man and I just want to be with a real straight woman who will love me the same way I love her and as much as I love her. I feel like this is not possible and it’s made me really depressed and suicidal.

Someone please help. If there are any truly straight women out there tell me this isn’t true and it’s just the internet. Or if not explain to me why so many “straight" women watch lesbian porn because I'm honestly confused.

A few months ago, at the beginning of my sophomore year, I met this guy. He had amazing hair, and dazzling blue eyes. We exchanged socials and talked for a bit, and then he abruptly unfollowed me. I have been thinking about him ever since, even though it's wrong. He has a girlfriend. He's older than I by two years. And he's going back to France at the end of the year. I mean, fuck, I've tried to get this man off my brain. But that just makes him reappear even more. I have had 6 dreams about him since then, and one about his language. I have tried talking to myself about the reality of this situation, and it always brings my out of the feelings, miraculously, but somehow I always end up in this bind of feeling for him again. How do I get over this stranger?

I joined a new friend group about a year ago. I got really close to one guy when I lost someone close to me. The group got together and decided to remove him from our discord and several of them blocked him. Turns out he had been sending many of the women in the group dick pics and steering conversations sexual even after being asked to stop many times.

When he heard I still talk to the group he got angry at me. I shouldn't spend time with people who kicked him out for "no reason". I want to block him too now but the one person I know is still on his side let me live with her. I told her what was going on but she likes the sexual talk and the dick pics so she doesn't care that he's been outright sexually harassing every woman in our group.

I know it'll stir shit up between us and without her I have nowhere else to go.

I'm at the point in life where I don't really know what I want in my life anymore. I'm still in highschool, a senior to be in fact, I should have had my plan already ready by now but it's not.

I honestly didn't think I made it this far but here I am I guess.

Anyway, yeah. I don't know what I want in life anymore. I want to become a doctor or an engineer yet my family doesn't have enough money for either, plus they would have preferred if I had just focused on preaching. So my dream jobs are clearly out of the way.

I'd be an artist but that doesn't really get you anywhere does it? Especially with the rise of ai 'art' and so many better and more talented artists- it'll be nearly impossible to make a name and a living.

Writer? No. I used to love writting but now I have no passion for it as much as I used to. Plus my writting is mediocre, boring and plaid even.

Maybe a family women? No. I'm not exactly good enough to be a trophy wife or a housewife.

Religion? Well I don't know. I do love God. I really try to but the thing is that religion kinds destroyed my relationship with God. Does that make sense? I love God, I just don't like what some (or most) of his people had done to his name.

Suicide? I don't know. My religion has only ever taught me that death is death. Nothing happens. You don't go to an afterlife, or hell or heaven not you don't get reincarnated. You just go to a deep slumber.

And as much as that sounds good to me, it scares me.

So yes. There doesn't seem to be a path for me anymore. I guess to put it simply; I'm lost. Very very lost.

It isn't helping that graduation is coming up soon, that means my time to make a choice is limited.

To be honest, I really do just want to best for me and others. So I hope to whoever is up there to lead me to it

OK so back in july i was talking to this boy named apple ok and me and him started talking after me and this boy named cookie broke up like 3 weeks ago at that time. SO we were in a talking stage for like a month but it was on and off bc i got grounded. But at the fair when i was hanging out with these 2 girls i saw him at the fair and i didn't recgonize him until like 2 days aftre l But when i got ungrounded we did IT and unfortunatley my mom found out and she blocked him without yk me knowing until like 5 days later. Fast forward like 4 months later after me and this boy lets call cactus broke up apple added me on snap on thanksgiving day saying happy thanksgiving and i was like "y did u add me?" and apple was like "ïdek how i added u im js drunk rn" So a week later my friend lets call her red head she showed me the ss of apple saying he wants a round 2 with me. but reminder he has a gf moving forward i asked him if it was true and at first apple was like no comment denying it and then he said yes. So that day i got his number and we talked. But the next day we did IT. But before we did It i was like "wouldnt it be cheating like she loves u like really loves you" and apple was like " ït wont be cheating if she doesnt see or find out" Just to be clear i knew his gf lets call her bunny back in janurary bc she followed me on tik tok first and she used to be close bsfs with my cousin before she moved schools. So apple would like talk bad ab bunny to me on call and when he was arguing with bunny over text when he was on call with me and he told me that they were arguing bc of the ss that my friend red head told and showed bunny. And apple was like gaslighting bunny and was like saying that red head edited the ss and that bunny was delusional. So 3 weeks later i texted bunny lettiing her know what happened before she finds out by some1 else and just to be a girls girls and she decided to be VERY DELUSIONAL and called me weird and dumb even tho shes still with him. Bunny was like "It doesn't matter if it was his idea you still went to his house" Like girl what??!! but they are still together. now So im gonna crash out bc apple gaslighted her again EVEN THO HE SAID THAT HE DIDN'T EVEN WANT HER AND COULDN'T BREAK UP WITH HER BC OF HER OLDER BROTHER AND HIS GRANDMA, But the thing is after me and cactus broke up apple and cactus were friends AND WAS HANGING OUT BRO THEY BOTH WORK AT APPLESBEES 2. But they are opps now so idek. ALSO APPLE LITERALLY VENTED TO ME AB HIS WHOLE BACKSTORY LIFE AND HIS DAD WHAT??! Btw apple wanted a round 2 with me bc he found out bunny (his gf) was talking to her ex again apparantley and when he confronted her she lied to his face. But he also told me that he was lowkey thinkin ab a round 2 when me and cactus was dating.