Couple Stories - page 3

I keep replaying the moment in my head—when i told her i wanted a divorce. after twenty years of marriage, saying those words felt like ripping out part of myself, but staying had become a different kind of slow death. she’s not well, her health is fragile, and that’s what makes it all so much harder. i’m not heartless. i still care. but i was living with someone who chipped away at my dignity for years. disrespect doesn’t show up all at once; it creeps in slowly. a condescending remark here, a dismissive gesture there, and before you know it, you’re invisible in your own life. i tried. really. therapy, talks, compromises that only I kept. and when i finally realized that no amount of loyalty would bring back the man i used to be, i chose to leave. but how do you stop the guilt when someone you leave behind is struggling physically? it’s not a movie with a clean ending, it’s more like walking out of a burning house that still has someone you once loved trapped inside. except that person won’t take your hand even when you reach back;

some people tell me, “you did the right thing,” others ask, “how could you leave her now?” and i honestly don’t have a satisfying answer to either. the guilt isn’t just about her condition—it’s about the idea that maybe i should’ve been stronger, more forgiving, more patient. maybe i failed some unspoken moral test. yet at the same time, don’t i have the right to protect myself too? we don’t talk about that enough—how emotional erosion can kill you just as surely as illness. i wasn’t trying to escape responsibility. i was trying to escape becoming a bitter, hollow version of myself. but now, every time someone says her name or i hear that she's been in and out of the doctor’s office again, it hits me like a sucker punch. do i reach out? would that help her—or just help me feel better? is guilt something that fades with time, or something you carry like a scar?

i guess what i really want to ask is—how do you know when you’ve done enough? when does choosing yourself stop feeling like abandonment? i read somewhere that “self-respect is the fruit of discipline,” and i’m trying to believe that choosing to walk away was an act of discipline, not betrayal. but most days, the line is blurry as hell. i keep showing up for work, paying the bills, calling our grown kids, pretending like everything is fine. but underneath, it’s like dragging a bag of wet cement everywhere i go. maybe guilt isn’t something to get rid of. maybe it’s just proof that you still give a damn. but it’d be nice if it didn’t show up every time i sit alone in a quiet room. so yeah—if you’ve ever had to choose between staying loyal and staying alive inside, how did you stop feeling like the villain in your own story?

So around last December, me and a friend were sitting around a fire and the fire wouldn't stay lit so we decided to go to a bar. Well, I didn't feel like changing clothes bc I was comfortable, and it was cold asf. So I went out wearing my plush pajama pants and a Columbia fleece jacket which probably wasnt the best idea😂 well we got too the bar and we were playing pool and my buddy bumped into this dude behind us, and when he did it made the guy miss his shot. So the dude was not happy at all he turned around and pushed my buddy. So being the friend that I am I walked up and pushed this guy too the ground, and when I did one of his buddies came up behind me and uppercutted and grabbed and was squeezing tff out of my balls all at the same time. Until I went to my knees and when I got down to his level I remember him saying in my ear while still squeezing and twisting my balls "oh your boys are nice and fuzzy".Which i mean the pants are soft asff but there were so many people around. Including girls lol that heard that, and it was humiliating. I couldn't do anything but hold my inner thigh and hoped he let go. Well, it went on for about 30 more seconds. That's when i felt something pop and he let go. I instantly got to my feet, limping but walking. My buddy helped me walk out of the bar. I remember being sore and not being able to close my legs for a week. My gf still doesn't know about anything when she asked me what was wrong. I just told her I rolled my ankle bc she kept asking why I was limping. What would be a good way to tell her about this embarrassing situation?

it’s been eating at me for years now, this thing i carry around, like a rotting piece of fruit in my pocket—i can’t just throw it away, but damn if it doesn’t stink up everything. i cheated. not once. not even just a fling that came and went. multiple times, over the years, with different women, for different reasons, and none of them were good enough. i never told her. my wife, the one who still looks at me like i’m the guy she married twenty years ago. the guilt didn’t hit right away; it crept in slow, like fog rolling over a field, and now i can barely see who i am anymore. forgiveness feels like a word other people get to use, not me. i tried everything—therapy, journaling, praying (and i’m not even religious), but none of it sticks because the truth is still there, hidden and heavy. i know people say “forgive yourself or it’ll eat you alive,” but they never talk about how to do it when the person you hurt doesn’t even know they were hurt. is it even forgiveness if there’s no accountability? or is it just denial dressed up as healing? i don’t want to confess just to ease my own conscience, that feels selfish. but doing nothing, pretending i can move forward while dragging this corpse of a past behind me, doesn’t work either.

i keep asking myself, “what would i tell someone else in my position?” i’d probably say, “you’re not the worst thing you’ve done.” but when it’s you, when you look in the mirror and you see the choices etched into your face, that’s a whole other story. i’m trying to show up every day as a better man. i do the chores without being asked, i actually listen when she talks, i plan date nights—stupid little things that don’t erase the past but might just build something better today. but it’s not really for her; it’s for me, trying to prove i’m not a total piece of shit. the worst part is knowing she might never find out, and if she did, it would destroy everything we built. i don’t want to confess just to clean my soul at the cost of her peace. so where does that leave me? stuck in this weird middle ground between shame and pretending. it’s like trying to fix a leak with duct tape—you know it’s not gonna last, but you keep using it anyway. sometimes i wish she would find out on her own, just so the weight would fall off me without having to make the choice; that’s cowardly, i know. but feelings aren’t always noble. “we are more often treacherous through weakness than through calculation,” montesquieu said. maybe that’s me. maybe that’s all of us. 🥀

My bf: I don't want to go canoeing with you. It sounds like work, and I'm too busy anyway! Now here's something really fun, how about your drive me to my friend's daughter's who you've met 3 times's high school graduation and accompany me at her graduation party for 8 hours? Oh, and no drinking because you're the driver! Doesn't that sound like fun and not work?

Hey everyone, it's my first time here (or any of these kinds of app/website for that matter, so sorry if I'm breaking any formatting or rules) and I just want to share my story anonymously with strangers as I don't want to share anything with any of my friend group as I don't want them to think bad of my ex-fiancée.

I'm in my early 30s and my ex-fiancée a couple years younger, and we met about 6 years ago. It was on a night out in the city that a mutual acquaintance introduced us. We instantly clicked and started dating a few weeks after. Since a majority of our values and goals in life aligned with one another's back then, we were so happy and though we finally found each other's "the one".

Of course a relationship isn't all ups, occasionally we would have a fight regarding what is expected of the other party since we are both working professionals and felt like we were not prioritizing our partnership enough. They are nothing we can't resolve though, we always talked it out coming up with a compromise. Although now it feels like this was a mistake since compromises aren't enough and we are not getting our needs and wants fulfilled with it. Regardless of this, am I wrong in assuming that with these setbacks, with love we were still supposed to choose each other right?

Over the years we have built plans for the future and have actively been working on them, getting engaged just early this year. We were also just about to purchase a house, but yeah my company suddenly had a round of mass layoffs and I was impacted. It's pretty hard to get a job at this time of the year in tech, with the sparse amount of openings and fierce competition. I felt like this was one of the lowest periods of my life so I sort of withdrew from everything. I even shut off my ex-fiancée as I didn't want to bother her with personal issues that she couldn't do anything about.

I guess this was her tipping point, I didn't see that her wanting to go to places which are expensive for my taste or even go on a full week vacation was her way to bid for connection, get me on my feet, telling me that it's okay to delay our plans for a bit, and fulfill her needs in one goal. I saw it as she just being financially irresponsible and unintentionally setting back our years of hard work, so I always flat out rejected her invites, intending to only use our savings for necessities and not for leisure just so we would still have enough when going to buy properties again.

She cheated on me with someone she met on the vacation she went to alone. I was devastated, it made me realize how much I was lacking. How much I didn't fulfill what she actually wants. I knew this because she was the one who confessed it to me as she cannot handle her guilt/conscience. I immediately forgave her but yeah we both can't see being with each other anymore because of this.

It feels weird that I'm not feeling any anger, just sadness. Just emptiness. We officially broke up, and now I don't know what to do anymore moving forward since I dedicated a large portion of my recent years working towards a future that never will be. I might heal, but I feel that I can never love or trust anyone again. I hate this.

Being married to someone with ADHD is a bit like managing a never-ending whirlwind... 🤯 I'm a 39-year-old male, and let me tell you, the struggle is real! Balancing a marriage where spontaneity and disorganization reign supreme sometimes feels like a Herculean task. Words like "executive dysfunction" and "time blindness" have become part of my daily vocabulary. My vows did not include being an impromptu project manager, yet here I am, juggling schedules, managing chaos, and frequently playing the diplomat in our otherwise harmonious union.

One day blends into another, all marked by last-minute schedule changes and unexpected curveballs. I've read countless articles, promising that understanding is the key, "knowledge reduces frustration." While I do make an effort to empathize and educate myself, there are days when the constant unpredictability becomes overwhelming. Who knew that even planning a simple dinner could devolve into a logistical nightmare? 🍛 As much as I love spontaneity in small doses, I am not exactly a fan of daily surprises that involve lost keys, missed appointments, or urgent late-night runs to the store because we ran out of toothpaste (again).

Despite it all, I commend my spouse for their efforts to work with their ADHD and seek help where needed. Together, we have implemented what I like to refer to as "behavioral scaffolding”—strategies meant to curb chaos, such as color-coded calendars, digital reminders, and whispered daily affirmations of patience. On most days, these measures improve both our lives, but on others, they feel like mere Band-Aids, barely holding back the floodwaters. Have you ever heard the saying, "the straw that broke the camel's back"? Well, it feels like I'm constantly searching for new ways to reinforce the camel.

In the end, I don't want anyone to think it's all bad. We have our moments of brilliant clarity and profound connection. Thanks to ADHD, love is never boring! However, dealing with it requires understanding, patience, and, dare I say, a touch of humor. 😂 It is important to remember that what we deal with is not our significant other's personality, but a condition they did not wish for. Would you agree that the spontaneity, only manageable with communication, sometimes also breathes life into mundane routines? Nonetheless, I hope sharing this has lifted some weight off my chest. If you're sailing a similar boat, remember: you're not alone. Stay strong, stay patient, and find joy in small victories.

My boyfriend has been going through his hardest times, he lost his brother by a car accident, and he lost track of the criminal he was chasing after for more than a year, furthermore he was standing at the edge of the rooftop yesterday night— I swear I knew what that dark look on his face meant

In fact I was dumb enough to get rings already :(

But should I propose now with that high risk of getting rejected or should I wait until next year or whenever he feels better? Because I’m sure if I propose to him now, he’s going to throw dishes at me and shout at me so that he can feel better, and trust me I’m not in a toxic relationship…

So a few months ago, my boyfriend found out about his younger brother’s cancer which was already at level four :(

He’s just depressed and trying to earn as much as possible for the surgery fees and he’s just different

He talked less and he touches grass less

How do u cheer him up? Even the doctors said that his beloved brother won’t make jt out alive unless he receives a heart donation

so... my wife of 25 years suddenly tells me she wants to see other people.... now, i ain't saying i'm the most open-minded guy on the planet, but this really left me scrambling for answers. i mean, after a quarter of a century of marriage, are we really doing this? is sharing my wife something i should even consider? i'm a guy who appreciates loyalty and commitment, you know? i always thought those things were the bedrock of our relationship. we were the couple who finished each other's sentences and could talk without speaking a word. now i find myself wondering if all those moments meant the same to her as they did to me. she tells me she still loves me, that this isn't about replacing me, just about exploring new experiences. but let's be real, how am i supposed to process that? is it unreasonable of me to expect exclusivity in a marriage? am i being too old-school here? now, i'm no prude, and i know times are changing, but this kind of feels like exploring new territories when i'm comfortable where i've been planting my roots. i find myself asking if sharing my spouse is really something people do in a healthy relationship. i guess it's a matter of perspective, right? i've read about open relationships, and some people swear by them, saying it brings them closer and all that jazz. but let's be straight here: sharing your partner ain't everyone's cup of tea. there’s an insecurity that bubbles up just thinking about it. like, how does a guy not worry about being pushed aside or becoming the plan b? talking to some buddies about this hasn't exactly put my mind at ease either. one of them said, "dude, if it makes her happy, maybe it's worth considering." sure, i get that making your partner happy is important, but what about my happiness? is it selfish of me to feel anxious and uncomfortable with the idea that she might find something - or someone - better? and then, what about trust? sharing her means putting a helluva lot of trust out there. what if trust turns into jealousy? can our marriage handle that test? then i think about all the years we've spent building a family, raising kids, and i wonder what it says to them if we embark on this route. is it saying, "hey, devotion isn't that big of a deal after all?" maybe i'm overthinking it, but what message does that send? it’s just that the thought of her with someone else—it’s unnerving. i always figured marriage was a two-person gig. so, am i wrong for feeling territorial about my wife? i thought we signed up for a lifetime of commitment, not a lease with renewal options. perhaps i'm just trying to hold onto a notion that time and society have evolved beyond. i still don't know if i have the emotional bandwidth to share her affection. so, i'm reaching out into the anonymous void looking for advice or perspective. how do i get my head around this without losing it? i mean, i wouldn't mind hearing some realistic takes or personal stories from anyone who's been down this road. have you ever been asked to share something you couldn't quite let go of? not sure where this will lead, but it’s a conversation i can't have with her just yet. life at 52 sure is throwing its challenges, and maybe it's just another lesson i'll look back on someday. but for now, anyone willing to share their two cents?

Its about my boyfriend. I dont want to talk bad about them because they're dealing with some stuff mentally and emotionally, mostly anxious problems. But I just hate hate it when I spend an hour waiting for him. I would be ok if the cafe was a one off thing but no. We've had multiple dates where I waited for him for an hour or almost an hour. Its not like I go on time sometimes, even I am late on the agreed time, mostly 5-10 minutes late because I really dont like making people wait for me. but when I get there he isn't there yet.

Its just... Once I managed to wait an hour on the mall we agreed to go to, walk all the way to his home, its quite close maybe 10-15 minutes with the pace I was going, and wait for more time before I even saw him get out of his house hair wet from shower. I understand he also has chores but that was just ridiculous.

But since my parents dont really know about us.. I always had to be creative and set time that wont be too late or too early, reasoning it as me needing to buy something for school, so the time is even more needed to be followed if you get me. His parents also dont know so we usually agree on a set time the day before. Rarely we agree on hanging out on the same day but when we do ita usually atleast 3hrs before..

But really I should've known better after dating him for almost 3 years now. He's the type to be late even on our own graduation, he barely made it with his mom before his name was called.

What's more upsetting about the cafe this is that its currently summer, that means I don't even have that much excuses to go out because I dont have projects to buy supplies for or no study groups to go to. We had a meeting for our school's journalism club for some reason which was, although cancelled, was a good excuse to leave the house.

I just feel like I should be more understanding but it's really upsetting checking my phone every five minutes for a text that says he'd be late or something. Sometimes I even get worried he wont show up at all.

man, life can really throw you a curveball sometimes. i'm 41, a guy who's been through a lot, but this? this takes the cake. just found out my wife’s been playing the field. yep, she had the ol’ side dish while i was none the wiser. and now? now she’s saying it was a mistake, that she wants to cut it out and make things right with me. she says she loves me and wants to spend forever with me. like, what am I supposed to do with that?! it’s hard to swallow, you know?

she claims she’s all ready to ditch her little joyride and focus on us, make things all sunshine and rainbows again. 🤷‍♂️ but, like, do I just go along with it? is it really as easy as forgive and forget or am i just fooling myself here? i'm over here like, yeah, it’s great you wanna do right by me, but does that mean i’m supposed to just forget the whole shebang? i mean, are we just gonna snap our fingers and poof, history’s rewritten? seems too good to be true, doesn’t it? like, who’s got the magic wand in this scenario? not me, that’s for sure. 🙄

let’s be real, trusting someone after they’ve done the dirty isn’t just an automatic function. no magic switch to flip. 🕵️‍♂️ it’s like i’m caught in this cycle of disbelief, anger, and just plain confusion. and, honestly, i'm a little torn on whether to think she’s genuinely sorry or if she's just scared of being alone. this whole thing's bonkers, right? and if i decide to roll with the punches, what happens next? is there some secret sauce i’m missing out on? i’m 41, not 21, i've pit stops in life, know what i mean?

someone tell me, is forgiving the same as forgetting? can you really split them apart like some happy divorce, leaving one behind while the other seamlessly takes over? ❤️ someone over here probably just thinks i’m overthinking it, but isn’t that part of the gig when you get burned? it’s not like you accidentally spill coffee on your shirt and brush it off. it's deeper than that. but here we are, with her wanting a reset and me caught between two minds. what would you do? what’s the next move when the love of your life drops a bomb this big?

so, there it is. the million-dollar question. do i forgive and forget, slap a bandaid on it and move on? or am i setting myself up for a rerun of heartache? does loyalty outweigh mistakes? it’s not a black-and-white scenario, folks. 😤 there’s a lotta gray zones up in here, and i’m just trying to find my way without turning into an emotional wreck. her words are nice and all, but where’s the guarantee? i mean, do guarantees even exist here or is this all just a gamble? i guess time will tell, huh? but in the meantime, i'm just here, weighing my options, trying not to lose my mind.

My boyfriend asked for a break recently, but its not the mutual type of breaks. He never listens and never puts in consideration MY own feelings. He hurts alot sometimes but I really love him and dont want to lose him. My lifes bullshit

I've been on this wild journey of self-discovery, and honestly, what a trip it’s been figuring out my damn sexuality. Like, one minute I’m crushing hard on this girl in my class, we vibe so well, and then the next, I’m drooling over some guy in a coffee shop, and I’m like, "what the actual heck is happening?" It’s like I’m a walking contradiction, and if anyone’s got a spare manual on this kinda stuff, hit me up! So, I’ve been trying labels on for size – bisexual, pansexual, queer – but nothing feels quite right; each label seems to fit like a shoe from the clearance rack at a thrift store, you know? One day I’m in the mood for a romantic comedy featuring a fierce female lead, the next, I’m binging on some brooding male anti-hero drama. Heck, I’ve even Googled “what is my sexuality?!” like a million times, coz surely the internet knows better than me, right? 😂 It feels like an episode of "Queer Eye" gone wrong, where they’re just yelling, “Love yourself, you’re fabulous!” while I’m over here like, “Thanks, but can I just get some clarity?” I remember this one time my best friend said, “You can love whoever the hell you want,” and I thought, wow, she’s onto something. Why do I even need a label? It’s like trudging through a minefield of expectations, assumptions, and stereotypes, and let’s face it, some people are so bent on shoving you into a specific box, it’s nauseating. We have “The Kinsey Scale,” which is cool and all, but I sometimes feel like saying, “Screw the scale, I’m just vibing.” I read somewhere that sexuality is fluid, and it makes total sense; I mean, one moment you’re in love with the idea of a picnic with a girl, and then suddenly you're all about a romantic evening with a dude and a bottle of wine. So, like, what am I? Do I really need to label it? Labels seem helpful, but they also seem restrictive. It’s a double-edged sword. And dating? Ugh, don’t even get me started. Trying to navigate that landscape feels like climbing Mount Everest without gear. Swipe left, swipe right, and the anxiety? It’s crippling. And the worst part is when someone asks, “So, what do you identify as?” and I’m like, “How about a hot mess?” You know that awkward moment when you’re honestly reflecting and you just want to scream “I’m just me?!” Sometimes I think, “Do I have to pick a side?” and the answer seems to be no. I mean, is it really that serious? Like, I read a quote that said, “Sexuality is like a rainbow: it’s made up of many colors,” and that resonates so much. I wanna play with all the colors! So anyway, I’m embracing whatever this is, because life’s too short to stress about it, right? I’ve had those nights where I just wanna melt into my blankets, binge-watch my favorite shows, and cry about confusing romance. It’s rough; I've asked myself if I'm overthinking it or if I’m just, I don’t know, bored with the binary? 😕 Some days I just want a partner who gets my latest obsession with true crime documentaries and how I think pineapple on pizza is a crime against humanity. Why are we so obsessed with labeling everything? Can’t it just be about feelings and vibes? I might still be in the thick of figuring this out, but I’m cool with that now; it’s part of the journey, and the journey is kinda beautiful in its chaos. Who’s with me on this? Anyone else feeling the weight of the world’s expectations, but also finding joy in the messiness of it all? Nobody should feel cornered or pressured to fit into a neat little label, I mean, “Sexuality is a spectrum, not a straitjacket,” right? Let’s enjoy the ride, and maybe, just maybe, we’ll discover that love comes in all shapes and sizes – and sometimes, it’s just about being open to whatever floats your boat;

I’m just sitting here, scrolling through photos of my husband, and honestly, it can get pretty lonely sometimes. Like, don’t get me wrong, I’m super proud of him; he’s out there serving and doing what he loves, but when I think about how my day-to-day looks compared to his, it feels like we’re living in separate worlds. I’m 27, and I just live in this small town, working my job, going to the gym, and hanging out with friends on weekends, but I always come home to an empty house. I mean, I’ve got my dog, and he’s a great buddy, but it's just not the same, you know? Plus, I miss all those little things we used to do together, like cooking dinner or binge-watching our favorite shows. Now, most nights, I just end up on the couch with a bowl of popcorn, scrolling through Netflix, saying, “Wow, this would’ve been fun with him." 😔

I think one of the hardest parts is when I see everyone else enjoying their relationships. I mean, my friends will post those cute couple pics, and I’m really happy for them, but it hits different when you’re in a relationship but still feel alone. Every now and then, I catch myself staring at his empty side of the bed and wishing things were different. Just last week, I had a pretty rough day at work—I was all stressed out, and all I wanted was to talk to him. I picked up my phone, but then it hit me again that it was just going to be a short voice message. I mean, I’d pour my heart out, and he wouldn’t hear it until who knows when; it’s tough feeling so far away. But I try to focus on the good things, like keeping a journal where I write letters to him. It feels therapeutic, and maybe one day he’ll read them and just realize how much I miss him, you know?

For me, being a military spouse is a mixed bag; there are days when the loneliness just kind of creeps in, but I also find ways to stay connected. I set reminders for us to FaceTime at least once a week, and those little chats really make it worth it. I’ve started finding little hobbies too, like painting, which helps me work through feelings and express myself. It’s like a little escape right at home when I can’t be with him. Maybe you’ve found yourself feeling lonely in your relationship too? I hope to hold onto that hope that this phase will get better and that one day, we’ll have more time together. It’s all about the little moments we create, even from miles away; I just need to hang in there and keep looking forward to when we’ll finally be together again.

So, I'm currently in a long distance relationship since several years, and I'm also very happy with my partner. Aside from occasional small conflicts, which I imagine are part of any relationship, there aren't any things that make me unhappy. I love him and we have a very good chemistry, we talk transparently about any issue that comes up, and i can imagine staying with him in the long term. Overall I'd say I'm the happiest I have ever been in a relationship.

Although recently I got a message from my ex-girlfriend after 7 years of silence, which also happens to be my first partner ever, but our past is a bit more complicated. For context, we were an on-off couple, which honestly was because she broke up with me every time she found an issue in our relationship. And I absolutely see that those issues were caused on both sides. Both of us were immature at that time, since we were 17 and 19 when we got together, and with my knowledge from today this was probably her way of coping with problems, removing them from her life or running away instead of facing them. There also was family drama and mental health problems she was struggling with, which made it even harder to talk about issues with her. At some point we had a bigger argument and she blocked me and cut all ties for good, that's when the 7 year gap happened.

So much for the negatives, but we also had a lot of similarities in our personality and interests. I could talk with her like I could with no one else back then, and it often felt like the cliche of "having found a soulmate". I can't say if that was just the experience of being in love for the first time or not, and I certainly don't want to make comparisons with my new partner, since there has been too much time, changes of circumstances and personal development happening in between those two relationships.

So when she reached out to me I was very surprised at first, because I thought I would never hear from her again, and I also was fine with that. She basically said she wanted to find closure, apologized about her mistakes and behavior, and we had a bit of small-talk about our work and stuff. At first I thought "okay, I don't care about this person anymore, I'll accept her apology because I have good faith in everyone and I'm glad she reflected on her personality, so she deserves getting the closure she wants".

However I start to feel more and more unsure about my actual feelings. It's not that I feel in love, but there seems to be this kind of "fascination" (idk how else to put it) when seeing pictures of her, like seeing an old friend and wondering what they have been up to for the last 7 years, and you just want to hang out with them to hear all their stories. The things is that I had those same feelings of fascination when meeting her for the first time, and it's what later then turned into us being together.

This is on my mind all the time ever since we talked again, I'm having fantasies of meeting her again to catch up, and I can't tell if it's because I'm still processing it, or if it's because there might actually be feelings developing again. I'm also really happy for her to have made that step of reflecting on her mistakes, which is why just blocking her and moving on would kind of feel unfair towards her.

This is where things get a bit complicated. My current partner has insecurities when it comes to "being replaced", which I fully get and respect. He also knows we talked and didn't feel great about it, he says he respects my decisions but also made it clear that he feels uneasy with me talking to this person. For this reason I don't consider meeting up with her, or even continuing the conversation. I don't want to do anything that makes my partner feel bad or insecure.

However, I'm also a bit afraid that I might just have suppressed my feelings for her during the pause we had, and by her reaching out these feelings got unlocked again, and that's the reason I'm currently feeling those emotions I'm unsure about. It could also be that I simply feel memories of the feelings I had back then, and perhaps these memories will fade during the next weeks. My current partner doesn't know about these conflicted feelings I have, because I don't want to make him worried or even more insecure, but he knows that she reached out to me and we briefly talked.

So I know the logical solution to this would be "forget her and move on, you're happy with your current partner" or "find out which one you want to be with", but at this point I simply can't tell what those emotions are I have towards her. Friendship? Memories? Suppressed love? I simply don't know what I'm feeling, or how I should react in this situation. How do I find out what I'm actually feeling, and depending on what the result of that is, what is the "right" way to carry on? Maybe some of you have experienced something similar, or you just have an advice for me? Any comment is appreciated :)