Parenting And Education Stories - page 3

My son’s father and I began dating in 2019. We were happy, no fights. I got pregnant and had our son in September of 2022. I broke up with him shortly after the birth because I didn’t want to raise two kids if I only gave birth to one. He’s a decent father, I can’t say that he doesn’t love our son and that he won’t do anything for him. My issue with him is his parenting style. He doesn’t really know what to do, and I can’t fault him for that because we’re both figuring things out as we go.

Our son lives with me full time. He has never had an overnight sleepover at his dad’s . I arrange all childcare while we work. I buy all of his clothes, food, diapers, arrange all play dates, doctors appointments, etc. I have the insurance, i paid for any and all cribs, pack n plays, car seats, etc. This isn’t to say that his dad isn’t supportive and won’t provide financially. I’m certain that if I asked, he would give (I just don’t ask). The problem is, he doesn’t think about any of this stuff. So why should I let him sleep over.

**Backstory** He lived with his parents when we were dating and just lived out last November. He never told me he moved. I found out because he posted something on social media and my brother privately texted me asking when he moved and I knew NOTHING about it. And I know there’s a new girlfriend in the mix that he’s probably living with because he accidentally called me her name when we were on a family ice cream date together. I’m not stupid, I can put two and two together.

Am I wrong for not allowing my two year old to not sleep over at his dad’s house when I don’t even know where he lives or who he’s living with?? (He did give me the address finally but I haven’t been over to check the place out).

There are different type of people. "My parents are divorced", "My parents are happily married". My parents SHOULD be divorced. I don't want them to get divorced, but at the same time, they're clearly not healthy for each other. They argue every day and their personalities don't match at all. Twenty five years of marriage, and they've never really loved each other. I think they both could be been happier in anther world, where they never met each other. My mum met someone she loved and married him in that universe. My dad never settled down and traveled the world. I was never born in that universe, but they're both happy that way. I love both of my parents and I want them to be happy. They bring out the worst in each other, and it's painful. I feel so afraid, because their moods become sour. If I mess up, my mum gets angry. If I get upset over her arguing, she tells me to not make it about myself. I'm not blaming her, because I know this could have been avoided if my mum was with someone else. I know they're only staying together "for the kids" (aka me and my siblings), but even their children can see how unhealthy this is. I can't tell them to divorce, neither can I mend their relationship. So I just have to live through it for a few more years. But I don't know how much more I can take.

I never thought I’d be the guy who had it all together. And to be honest, I still don’t feel like I do. But when I look at my life—my wife, my kids, our home—I know I’m lucky. I have a good job, a healthy family, and a reason to wake up every morning. I remember being younger, picturing what adulthood would look like, and this was it. The stability, the love, the feeling of coming home to people who actually want to see you at the end of the day. Life is good. But at the same time, there’s this nagging thought in the back of my mind that I can’t shake: it can be better.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not unhappy. It’s not like I want to run away from my responsibilities or trade any of this for something else. But sometimes, I feel like I’m just going through the motions. Work, bills, fixing things around the house, making sure the kids have everything they need. Then it’s bedtime, a few hours of quiet, and we do it all over again. And I love my family more than anything, but I miss something I can’t even put into words. Maybe it’s freedom, maybe it’s excitement, maybe it’s just the feeling of being more than just a dad and a husband.

I see other guys chasing their dreams—starting businesses, traveling, picking up new hobbies—and I wonder if I’m supposed to be doing that too. Should I be pushing myself harder? Should I be taking risks instead of playing it safe all the time? There was a time when I had big ideas, when I wanted more than just a comfortable life. But now? I’m not even sure what more looks like anymore. And the weird thing is, I feel guilty for even thinking about it. Like, shouldn’t I just be grateful for what I have? Shouldn’t this be enough?

Maybe part of the problem is that I don’t really take time for myself. I’m always in “dad mode” or “work mode,” and when I do get a second to breathe, I don’t even know what to do with it. I used to love playing guitar, used to spend hours drawing, used to actually read books instead of just scrolling through my phone. But somewhere along the way, those things stopped feeling important. Now, if I do anything that isn’t productive, I feel like I’m wasting time. And there’s always something else that needs to get done.

But I don’t want to wake up one day and realize I let myself disappear. I don’t want to be that guy who only existed for his family and forgot how to be his own person too. My kids are gonna grow up. They’re gonna have their own lives, their own problems, their own dreams. And when that happens, who will I be? Just some guy who works and pays bills? That thought scares me more than I like to admit.

So yeah, life is good, but it can be better. Not because I want more money or a bigger house or some crazy adventure. But because I want to feel alive in my own life, not just present in everyone else’s. I don’t know exactly what that looks like yet, but I know it starts with me. And maybe that’s enough for now.

Im gna go fucking insane in this household , not a day goes by without my dad demanding shit or threaten to beat me and my siblings. Im just sitting in my room and he comes in, i got up to greet him and he got so fucking mad at me???

I swear im so sick of people telling me to enjoy my teenage years when i have a shitty dad and school stress is at its peak. I cant do anything without being criticised.

When my first semester grades cane out i got 5 Fs. Yes i know its a lot but i was in and out of the hospital and constantly absent. I was so scared to show my dad i just cried to my mom for a solid 30 minutes then went upstairs and tried to calm myself. I went to the bathroom and passed out for a literal HOUR and no one came in to check on me

But oh Of course my dad had to be the one to check on me after an hour. He was banging on the door and when i unlocked it i was still on the floor, he just kept yelling at me and telling me i was fine and probably faking it just so he could pity me.

I swear my father is the most useless human being on earth. All he does is lay around all day and demand shit from us. He doesn’t gave a job, he’s not retired he just doesn’t wanna work. Mind you i am one of 4 kids. FOUR KIDS. The youngest among us is 7 years old. The only income we get is from the government which, no surprise, it’s not enough. He’s genuinely so fucking useless.

He literally walked into my room while i was on call with a friend and demanded i go study. Yes i get that i have finals but i need a fucking break. All this bitch does is sleep 15 hours a day and wake up at ungodly hours to play his shitty game all night and go back to sleep. And when he’s awake he makes it everyone’s problem.

I wish i could runaway with my gf. We’ve been dating for almost a year now and i love her. Genuinely life would be so much better if i didnt have an old hag nagging me everyday about shit he cant even do himself

I swear, sometimes I think my parents just want me to be miserable. Like, no matter what I do, it’s never good enough. If I get a B on a test, they like "why not an A?" If I actually get an A, they say "Well, was probably an easy test, right?" Like, can you just say good job for once??? And then they wonder why I don’t wanna talk to them. It’s like they only care about me when I do something wrong. And the rules?? Omg, don’t even get me started. I have to ask for everything. Can I go to my friend’s house? No. Can I stay out past 9 PM? No. Can I have my phone in my room at night? Of course not. Meanwhile, my little brother does whatever he wants. He stays up till like 2AM playing video games, leaves his stuff everywhere, and guess what?? No one cares!! But if I forget to put one stupid plate in the sink, suddenly it’s "you need to start taking more responsiblity in this house." Bro, I literally do everything. I help with chores, I do my homework, I try to be nice, but somehow I’m still the problem. It’s like they just wanna control me 24/7, and then they act shocked when I don’t wanna be around them. Like, gee, I wonder why.

And the worst part is, they act like my feelings don’t even matter. Like, if I say I’m stressed, they hit me with the "you don’t even know what real stress is." If I say I’m tired, it’s "you’re young, you have no reason to be tired." Ok then, sorry for existing I guess??? Just because I don’t have a job doesn’t mean school isn’t insanely exhausting. And don’t even get me started on the whole privacy thing. They act like I’m some criminal or something, always wanting to check my phone, asking a million questions about who I’m talking to, like why do you care so much? It’s not like I’m out here selling drugs or whatever. I just wanna have my own space without being treated like a little kid. But nope, apparently having basic privacy means I’m hiding something. I’m just so tired of feeling like no matter what I do, I’m still a disappointment to them. And then when I actually try to talk to them about it, they just get mad or say I’m being dramatic. Maybe I am dramatic, idk, but it’s not like they actually listen to me. They act like they know me but they don’t. I hate how they make me feel like I’m never enough. I hate how they don’t even try to understand me. I hate how I can’t even hate them properly, cause no matter how mad I get, I still love them. But sometimes, I really just wish they would see me for who I actually am instead of who they want me to be.

I have these day dreams where I torture people or I have to sacrifice myself to save everyone else and some days I'm happy but other days I feel like the life force I was born with is fading away into nothing.

I need help easing this anxiety real quick; im 17. I lost my virginity recently, we used protection and the guy didn’t eject. A condom or two broke, but we immediately put a new one on. However; my period is delayed two weeks. I’ve had a regular cycle for years. I can’t talk to my parents about this, especially my mom. They’re extremely strict with dating. I can’t tell my boyfriend about this, because im unsure.

There’s not a chance, right? 😭

I’ve been stressed for a long time now, so I know that can affect that, but it hasn’t before.

so my mom just got my report card and shes grounded me (I'm writing this on my school computer) wanna know why she grounded me? because I have 3 C's. shes being so irrational and stupid about it, it makes me want to bash her head into a wall and hope that it changes her stupid ways of thinking. She hit me so bad I cant feel my face or my finger tips. I also cant feel half of my head because she pulled my hair too hard and i feel like my skull is throbbing. she wont even let me go to the bathroom because shes forcing me to work my ass off on those assignments I have low grades on. I want this to end. I want her to end. I want her to stop thinking the way she does. I just want my phone back. I want a break. She acts like if I have low grades in ONE class the world is ending. She acts if there's a fucking atomic bomb dropping right on our doorstep because the FBI found out I had 3 still PASSING grades in my classes. The universe is HUGE and my grades are either just pixelated letters on a screen or a few strokes of ink on a piece of paper. This is also my teachher's faults. I submitted an assignment a few minutes late and she decides to give it a zero, despite the work being correct. That specific teacher's zeros are worth SOOOO much and they can so easily bring my grade down from an A to a D. Im afraid shes gonna go through my phone and find my private stuff. My conversations with my friends, my photos, and anything else. Those are relatively fine but I have an ai app on my phone and THAT is what I'm most scared of her finding. I know my limbs would be severed off one by one if she finds it. I just want this to end. I wish teachers weren't so strict with their grading and that they give you second chances.

Eversince i started middle school my mom has been so harsh on me. i mean I get it, its to get ready for the future, but that doesn't mean calling me a biatch, saying to go fock yourself, I wish you were never born, I wish you weren't a burden, I wish you knew how to say sorry, I wish I knew, I wish I could actually, I wish to die. I just WISH I can actually learn to love, to accept, to learn to say sorry, to just restart. Im sorry mom, I wish I listened to you earlier, I don't want our relationship like this, I don't want my mom to not care for me anymore, I want to have the relationship were mom and daughter are bestfriends, I'm sorry for this, I wish... I just wish, i wish i was never born so i wouldn't be a burden, i just wish wish wish, I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense

I've been struggled with depression since I was in grade 3 or 4. I didn't know what "depression" is until I grew up. And now, I'm still dealing with it every single days.

So i'm currently in my final year in university, i have a lot of things to worry about included my family, my future jobs, my future life,... so i sometimes feel overwhelm. In the final year, you're usually go to a company or an office to start your internship, right? Me too, but things didn't work out like I planned. My step-dad said that he can handle this because of his "wide networks" so he can find me a good place for my internship. It was the government's office, i didn't like it at first but still accept it because it related to my major. But people at the office didn't welcome me because they saw me entering the office as a "nuisance" or "this girl is good for nothing, only rely on her dad relationship". Then they made things hard for me to get my CV accepted. So right now, I still didn't get my internship, meanwhile, all the students in my uni are starting their owns. My friends too, they talked about how cool and lively their work environment are. It made me feel embarrased and bored. Not to mention, if I don't get my internship, I'll have to re-do my class ONE MORE YEAR. And I can't graduate on time.

Also, I'm kinda lost these days. I missed all the plan I've made and rot in bed days after days. Even tho in my head, I know I should get rid of those bad hanits of mine but I just can't find the motivation for it. And my mother tended to force me on doing houseworks instead of letting me go out for fresh air. She said i have to take care of my younger brothers and the house. And whenever i do something that trigger her, she'll beat me and scream at me with harsh words. I've been like this since I was in Kintergarden🫠 well she even said "i wish you were never born to me" so yea, i'm used to it. You may think I'm weak or helpless but that's just how I deal with my life. I still live til this day, but I'm not sure I can keep up with living like this anymore.

My husband has always had custody of his son. I came in the picture when he was 1 years old. Bio mom shows her face a few times a year. Normally on holidays when she likes to throw a fuss that she IS the mother and deserves to see/have him for holidays but otherwise doesn't bother with him any other time. Just for back story she has never worked, never provided for the child in any way, has never bought clothing or furniture or anything of the sort for my son. She also has another kid about 9 months younger than my son. And amongst a plethora of other issues, she will occasionally DEMAND hand-me-downs from my son because her other child "deserves them"/"deserves to feel close to his brother." To the point of questioning me when i list up things on Facebook market place as to why I am doing that and not just giving her the things. Or when I list them on freecycle again throwing a tantrum that they were not offered to her first . When he does outgrow toys that were given to him by her (which doesn't happen often because they are usually cheap and break before that can happen) they are offered back to her. But seeing as how my husband, his family, my family or myself solely support my son's every want and need i feel it is within my right to do whatever I want with what is ours and think it is ridiculous she thinks she has a right to them in any way.

When I come to the U.S., I was only 8 years old. My mom and dad bring me and my little sister from Mexico, saying we gonna have better life, better future. I believe them, I really do. But now, I am 26, and sometimes, I still don’t feel like I belong here. I do everything like American people—I go school here, I work here, I even speak English good (okay, not perfect, but good enough, I think). But still, when people look at me, I know they see different. They ask me, "Where you from?" and when I say, "Oh, I grew up here," they just look at me like they don’t believe me. Like I have to explain more. Sometimes I say, "I’m from Mexico," just to make it easy, but then they ask, "Oh, so you not American?" And I don’t know what to say. What I am? I am both. But also, maybe neither.

Life as first generation immigrant is... weird. I grow up in house where everything is Mexican—food, music, telenovelas, my parents speaking Spanish all the time. But outside, everything is American. I go to school, and kids make fun of my lunch because it smell “weird.” Teachers say my name wrong, so I stop correcting them. I try so hard to fit in, but at home, my mom tell me, "No te olvides de dónde vienes." Don’t forget where you come from. And I try, but sometimes I feel like I am too Mexican for Americans, but too American for Mexicans. I go back to visit family in Mexico, and my cousins laugh at my Spanish. "Hablas como gringo," they say. They right, I guess. But then here, people tell me, "Wow, your English is so good!" like they surprise. So, what am I? Where do I belong? I don’t know. And maybe, I never will.

So.

I’ve been struggling with different things for the past three years or even four, it’s been a while and I cannot remember exactly when this did start but I’ve tried everything to fit into what people want me to fit but at the same time I don’t care and at the same time o don’t wanna be a part of them, even if I try to be different I feel like if I’m just calling the attention or something like that and I’m afraid, afraid of myself and disgusted and…I don’t know what more, my mother did find out and tried to force me to get better by trying to make me fit in what she wants that just kept me pulling down

It’s been years now, but today still hurts like hell. Happy birthday, mom. I wish I could say that to you in person, hear your laugh, see that little smile you always did when you thought I was being too sentimental. But all I have now are memories and an empty space that never really goes away. People say time heals, but honestly? Some days it feels like time just makes me realize more and more how much I miss you.

I try to go on like it’s just another day, but it’s not. I see your favorite flowers at the store, hear a song on the radio that reminds me of you, and suddenly I’m right back to that ache I thought I’d learned to live with. I hope wherever you are, you know I’m thinking of you. I hope you know I’d give anything just to hug you one more time. Happy birthday, mom. I love you, always.