Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 2

Basically, i liked this guy ever since middle school and he recently asked me out! Good right? NO! I have this problem where when someone likes me back i try to find things that are bad about them, like hes not even that cute nor is he unique. And when we do break up, i end up feeling sad bcz i really liked the person but i also feel relieved?? I DONT KNOW WHATS GOING ON HELP ME PLESS

Now we've had my Nan's funeral I've gone from feeling numb and depressed to feeling

every think all at one and crying and not being able to each any of my favorite TV shows.

dose it ever get better

I'm in a bit of a bind here, fellas. My wife has just entered the whirlwind stage of menopause, and I'm standing like a deer caught in headlights. I mean, we've been through life's ups and downs together, but this one caught me off guard. It's like a roller coaster, and I’ve come to the stark realization that I don’t have a clue about how to be of any real help. I want to be there for her, but all I seem to do is put my foot in my mouth. I read somewhere that patience is key, but how much patience is enough? Is there some kind of magical guidebook for husbands out there? Trust me, I’m all ears if anyone cares to share it. This said, the mood swings are no joke. It feels like one minute we're reminiscing about old times, and the next, I'm in the doghouse for God knows what. Not to be insensitive, but even dogs need a break. I just want to wave a flag that says, "I'm trying, okay?" It's frustrating to be stuck in this losing battle where you’re trying to help, but everything you do just seems to miss the mark. “Persistance is key,” they say, but what does that even mean when you’re walking on eggshells?

In my humble opinion, someone should really write a “Menopause for Dummies” book with a special section just for us poor husbands trapped in this new reality. I keep hearing suggestions like "be understanding" and "just listen," but sometimes I wonder, are those just words thrown around, or do they actually mean something deeper? After all, you can’t exactly listen when the house feels like it's under siege. It's like I’m halfway through a Netflix series called "Midlife Chaos," and there’s no option to skip the episodes. Am I being overly dramatic? Perhaps. But surely, others in my shoes are feeling a similar kind of, let's say, discomfort. At 53, I thought I'd encountered most of life's surprises, but menopause is a whole new beast. If there’s a cheat code out there, I would be forever grateful. And hey, what does “be the rock” even mean when I’m feeling like a pebble myself? Maybe I’m just ranting into the void here, or perhaps someone out there can offer a lifeline. So, to my fellow clueless husbands: how are you holding up, and what’s working (if anything)? 🤔

I never thought i would be the person writing something like this, but here i am, typing late at night because sleep keeps avoiding me!! My wife cheated on me, and saying that sentence still feels unreal!! We have been together for eleven years, married for seven, and most days were normal, boring even, but safe!! I found out by accident, not by snooping like in bad movies, but because she left her email open on our shared laptop!! I wasn’t even looking for anything, just trying to pay a bill, and there it was, a thread that felt like it was screaming at me!! I remember my hands shaking, my chest tight, and this strange calm that followed, like my brain shut off to protect me!! She admitted it when i asked, didn’t deny it, didn’t cry much either, which hurt in a different way!! I keep replaying that moment, wondering if i missed signs, if i was too distant, too quiet, too predictable?? Maybe i was boring, maybe i stopped trying, or maybe it really had nothing to do with me at all?? People say cheating is a choice, and i believe that, but it still doesn’t stop the self doubt!!

Since then, everything feels slightly off, like living in a house where the walls moved an inch overnight!! We are trying to talk, slowly, politely, like two coworkers afraid of saying the wrong thing!! Some days she is kind and patient, other days she seems tired of my sadness, and i don’t fully blame her!! I find myself remembering small moments from our past, dumb jokes, road trips, the way she used to fall asleep during movies, and i wonder which parts were real and which were already broken!! I also think about the other person, not with anger all the time, but with curiosity, which i hate admitting!! What did they have that i didn’t?? Was it just timing?? I try to stay balanced, not painting her as a villain or myself as a saint, because life isn’t that clean!! I wasn’t perfect, i know that, i checked out emotionally sometimes, work drained me, and i stopped sharing my thoughts!! Still, cheating feels like dropping a bomb instead of knocking on the door!!

Now i’m stuck in this loop, deciding whether to stay or leave, and both options scare me!! Staying means rebuilding trust from almost nothing, and leaving means starting over in my late thirties, which feels exhausting!! Friends give advice, but everyone speaks from their own story, not mine!! Some say forgive, some say run, and i just nod because i don’t have answers!! I try to focus on basic things, eating, walking, working, but my mind drifts back every time!! I’m not looking for validation or drama, just understanding, maybe from strangers who won’t judge too fast!! Have you ever loved someone and still felt completely alone next to them?? How do you stop your thoughts from circling the same pain over and over?? If you’ve been here, what helped you breathe again!! I’m listening, even if i don’t reply right away!!

Ever feel like you're just a speck of dust in the universe, unnoticed and unimportant? like, you go through your day, and it's as if no one gives an ounce of thought about you? 🙄 let's start with my family, the people who are supposed to be my ride or die, right? wrong. they act like they care, but when was the last time any of them stopped, took a moment out of their busy lives, and actually reached out? it feels like forever and a day. instead, they're caught up in their own whirlwind of drama and issues, completely neglecting the fact that I might actually need someone to lean on. it's as if checking in on me isn't on their to-do list. and my friends... or whatever you'd call them. relationships feel so transactional these days. it's not like they give a rat's ass about what's going on with me unless there's a benefit for them in the picture.

then I start to wonder, am I the problem here? is there some kind of vibe I'm giving off that screams "keep your distance"? or am I simply expecting too much from people who are just as messed up as everyone else? it baffles me how they can continue living in their bubble, completely oblivious or indifferent to what's happening around them. maybe it's the rise of social media and digital clutter? we're so glued to our screens that meaningful connection is taking the back seat. it makes me question if empathy is becoming extinct 🙄 or am I just surrounded by people devoid of genuine human emotion?

sometimes I think about speaking up, letting them know how I feel like a ghost in my own life, but then I think... what's the point? i hate putting myself out there only to be met with an awkward "oh, i'm so sorry" before the topic changes faster than a bitcoin price. is it even worth it? it shouldn't be this hard to feel like someone actually cares, should it?? in a world where we have the capability to connect with someone on the other side of the globe in seconds, why do the people right next to me seem so far away??? i'm fed up with feeling like an afterthought, a barely-there blip on people's radar. so tell me, have you ever felt like this? do people really care, or are we all just prisoners in our own self-absorbed minds??? 🤔

So yeah, I am here because my head is kind of noisy and I don’t really know where else to put this. I have a new girlfriend now, it has been like two months, which is not super long but not nothing either, you know. She is nice, really kind, and honestly way more patient than I probably deserve. But here is the thing that keeps poking me in the brain at random times, usually late at night when I should be sleeping. I still have photos of my ex on my phone. Not printed or framed or anything dramatic, just old pics sitting there in my camera roll, mixed in with screenshots and food photos and dumb memes. I don’t even look at them on purpose, but sometimes I scroll too far back and boom, there we are, smiling like everything was fine. It makes my stomach drop a little. I am not missing her exactly, I think, but I am also not fully sure. It feels rude to my current girlfriend, even though she has no idea. I keep telling myself they are just memories, like old clothes you forgot in a drawer. But then I think, is that just an excuse to avoid doing something uncomfortable?

I try to be reasonable about it, like a normal adult, but I kind of fail at that a lot. My ex and I were together for years, and deleting those photos feels like erasing a chunk of my life, even if that chunk ended badly and with a lot of awkward silence. Some of the photos are boring, like us on a couch, but others are from trips or random good days where the sun was out and we laughed for real. I know keeping them does not mean I want her back, but it also does not feel super clean either. My new girlfriend talks about honesty a lot, and I nod and agree, and then I feel a bit fake inside. I have not lied, but I have not told the full truth either. I once tried to delete the photos, like actually started selecting them, and my finger froze like I was about to touch a hot stove. I felt silly, like why is this so hard, they are just pixels. Then I stopped and went to make a sandwich instead. Very brave of me. I keep wondering if this makes me a bad boyfriend or just a human one.

I guess what I am really stuck on is whether deleting them is for her, or for me, or just to look like a good guy on paper. I do not want to hurt anyone, I really don’t, and I am trying to be polite to everyone involved, including past me. At the same time, I don’t want to drag old stuff into something new and possibly good. Sometimes I think I should delete them as a sign that I am moving forward, like closing a door gently instead of slamming it. Other times I think it is okay to keep them tucked away, not because I am holding on, but because life happened and it is okay to remember it quietly. I feel unsure most days, and I second guess myself a lot, which is kind of my brand at this point. So I am asking you, random kind reader, what would you do? Would you delete the photos out of respect, or keep them and trust yourself to not live in the past? Is there a right answer here, or am I just overthinking a very normal thing like I always do?

My friend is married and has a wife and a kid. I love him platonically and I've often worried that us being close can be perceived as anything other than pure friendship. I'm a girl for context. We're both in our 20s. I've never been in a relationship, but all my friends including him are aware i'm not interested in dating. I'm also on the asexuality spectrum. Our friendshio has always been pure but things have been getting weird. I wonder if it's my fault. I'm heavily engaged in fandom things whereas he isn't. Anyway he'sknown since forever that I read fanfiction, even messed up kinds. Smut fic makes me fall asleep. Recently, he asked if there was any tropes i liked and I told him. But Idk why despite telling him im on the ace spectrum he kept relating it to me in a sexual way? It made me uncomfortable because i never imagine myself when I'm reading those. They've always been abstract to me. He's also recently been giving out hypothetical if i were single scenarios and I want to run away because it sounds like theres something more to it and I dont want any of that. I cant help but feel mad that he's being like this. I dont want to label but he's been dumping things on me emotionally that he won't dump on his wife, even though I've told him repeatedly he should.

My friend keeps telling me worrying things like sometimes he just wants to kill humself but what's the point and how he's numb and depressed. and same thing I tell him to talk to his wife or go to a therapist. It's been so draining and I'm getting so anxious. Like why are you being like this 😭

I love him dearly as a friend but how he's acting makes him seem like such a sleaze right now (i told him about things i like reading in fiction and he keep relating it to me sexually) and it's frustrating because he doesnt feel safe anymore :(

so here's the thing, I'm just trying to find a way to make some decent money while I'm still stuck in this endless cycle of textbooks, exams, and the overwhelming stress that comes with being a 22-year-old college student. you know the drill; trying to juggle studies, a social life that’s barely alive, and the never-ending pressure of student loans and bills sneaking up on me like a damn ninja in the dark. we're all just trying to get by, right? but damn, it's like a twisted game of survival out here and lately, I've stumbled upon something that's got me seriously scratching my head.

apparently, there's this whole gig where you can get paid to talk to lonely guys online. sounds sketchy as hell, doesn't it? i mean, is it really just talking, or does it quickly take a turn into a steaming pile of regret? i'm sitting here wondering if this is some kind of smooth-talking nightmare or if it's genuinely something I could do without losing my damn mind. the idea of talking to random dudes might not sound too bad at first glance. hell, i could earn some cash and maybe even forget that mountain of student loan debt breathing down my neck, but is it worth the potential weirdness? and honestly, what’s stopping some creepos from crossing the boundaries? i mean, let's get real for a second. remember that episode of 'black mirror' with the wholly unintended consequences? it doesn’t take a genius to foresee how things can go south in a heartbeat with people hidden behind screens, safe in their anonymity while i'm just trying to break free from my broke-ass situation. i'm definitely not about to turn into a digital therapist for some dudes who can't seem to function in society without playing therapist myself afterwards. no thanks. have any of you brave souls tried this? any horror stories that could save my naive ass from taking a misstep here? also, wasn't there a time when people paid for other more substantial, face-to-face things instead of just cheap talk on the internet? seems like we're living in some bizarre-ass timeline.

the whole "get-paid-to-chat" thing makes me wonder if i've somehow walked into the twilight zone, while also making me panic just a tad about the ease of virtual manipulation. sure, this could be harmless and maybe even hilariously entertaining, but i can't shake off the feeling that it could be slippery as hell. is this just a slightly more sanitized version of the classic 'sugar daddy' scenario minus the sugar? can't help but think about stories you hear in the news about people getting doxxed and dragged through the mud because they thought they could make a few bucks chatting away online. and do these guys really get anything out of it besides emptying their wallets for the promise of a meaningful connection? makes me think of Taylor Swift's "Blank Space" with its themes of failed illusions. i find it mind-numbingly bizarre that there’s a market for this at all, though i guess loneliness itself is an equally intense, bizarre thing. just seems like there should be about a thousand exclamatory signs warning people off from it. if you’ve done this gig, how the hell did it play out for you? no bs, give me the raw truth. because that's honestly what I'm craving right now. should i take the leap, or just continue to silently freak out about my impending financial doom? what's the worst that could happen, right? or does trying to justify it only mean risking what's left of my sanity and three shredded strands of dignity? and this low-key ruminating is not even out of desperation—just sheer curiosity, because a girl needs options in this financially unstable world of ours. let's not sugarcoat it, we’re all looking for that side hustle that doesn’t make us hate waking up in the morning more than we already do. if you've managed to survive or thrive in this, spill the beans.

I am 41. I am a woman. I have been married to an alcoholic for more than 15 years. I am sure he doesnt love me, and I am pretty sure it is becuase he is an alcoholic. This is not poetry. This is just facts from my kitchen table at 2 a.m. while he sleeps it off again. People like to say “love is patient” or “marriage is work.” Fine. But there is a difference between work and emotional starvation. I have done alot of waiting. Waiting for him to come home sober. Waiting for him to notice I cut my hair. Waiting for him to ask how my day was and actually listen. He can be generous, polite, even charming when he wants. He can also disappear into a bottle and leave nothing behind but noise and resentment. Therapists say, “don’t take it personally.” AA slogans say, “one day at a time.” Friends say, “he loves you in his own way.” I call bullshit. Love, real love, requires presence. He is never present. When he drinks, I am furniture. When he is sober, he is tired, ashamed, defensive. There is no room left for me. I remember once being sick with the flu, shaking, asking him to stay home. He said he would. He didn’t. He came back drunk and annoyed that I was “still miserable.” That memory sticks. It always will.

I am not saying alcoholics are monsters. I am saying alcoholism eats love first. It eats empathy, patience, and accountability. There is days when he looks at me like he is trying to remember who I am. That is the part no one wants to admit. Addiction turns relationships into transactions. I provide stability. He provides chaos. We orbit the same house but live seperate lives. I stopped expecting affection years ago. I stopped asking questions, becuase answers require honesty and sobriety. When I confronted him last year, he said, “I never asked you to stay.” That sentence was clean and brutal. He was right. I stayed. I also learned. Love cannot survive where alcohol is the priority. It will always come second, third, or not at all. I am balanced enough to admit my own role. I enabled. I hoped. I believed promises I knew were weak. But I am also honest enough to say this: love needs intention. Addiction has none. So tell me, reader, if someone chooses a substance over you every day, what word would you use for that? Is it love, or is it just habit dressed up as marriage? I am tired of pretending those are the same.

hey, so i'm sitting here going out of my mind with all these worries. i'm a mum with two boys, 13 and 15, and i can't stop thinking about what kind of world they're gonna be facing in the future. like, how the hell are they gonna find a job when AI is taking over everything? am i alone in this? i mean, everywhere i look, it's robots this, automation that, and it's got me wondering what kind of job market's gonna be left for my boys. maybe you've read articles or seen those doomsday predictions about robots turning us humans obsolete? it's not a peaceful thought. schools don't seem to prepare them for a future where creativity and humanity are the only things machines can't replicate. 🤔 and let's not even talk about the pressure these kids face, like, how can they compete with an algorithm that never sleeps, never gets tired? it just feels like a losing battle, and i don't know if i'm supposed to tell them to shovel coal or learn coding at this point.

plus, it's not just the job market, right? everything just feels like it's spiraling out of control. we're dealing with all this climate change craziness, and who knows what kind of world they'll inherit. i sometimes wonder if i should just be teaching them wilderness survival skills instead of algebra. it's hard not to feel like, what's the point? even my parents and their endless wisdom have no clue what's coming next—they're baffled by smartphones, so imagine trying to explain AI threats to them. 🤦‍♀️ you ever feel like you're in an episode of 'black mirror,' but there's no fast-forward button, just gotta wait it out? and the school systems? don't even get me started! schools are still teaching stuff that's been outdated since i was a kid. honestly, who needs cursive writing now? it's just like, come on, shouldn't we be focusing on skills that'll actually help them survive in the future?

man, it would be fantastic if i could just flip a switch and not worry. but seriously, how can you not worry about the future when every headline, every news article just screams apocalypse? i mean, even podcasts, which were my go-to escape, have turned into these doom and gloom fest about the tech-dystopia we're supposedly heading into. 😩 and social media? forget it, it's like living in a constant state of anxiety with everyone just adding more fuel to the fire. maybe i need to start dosing myself on some ignorance is bliss, but then again, can you really afford to be ignorant in a world that changes so damn fast? so if you're out here thinking it's just you—nah, mate, we're all riding this storm out together, just trying to figure out how not to lose our marbles in the process.

lately after valentines day, a month after my bf broke up with me, i've been feeling more suicidal. i already relapsed on cutting myself 2 times. just 2. i used to be addicted to cutting myself. that burning sensation i get on my skin, that feeling of satisfaction of im getting what i deserve, or that weird feeling of comfort i get out of cutting myself. its like a sick twisted way of me re-assuring everything is real. Whether i like it or not. For context of my breakup, i helped my friend with his past relationship, whre his ex cheated on him. i started to like, i confessed. we agreed to date, then he broke up with me 3 days later cause hes scared and lost feelings for me already. he also said he only agreed to date me bc he thought i would be depressed if irejected him but to be honest, him breaking up with me and getting my hopes up like that got me more depressed. i would have been ok with rejection. its fine. but him getting my hopes up like that? it hurts more than anything. i kinda hate myself for being stupid enough to confess. hes also still not over his toxic ex. it hurts. alot. it makes me wanna cry so bad.

TW: talk of suicide and sh

I have felt suicidal since I was 7 years old, im now nearly 15 and am just done, ppl keep telling me to kms and its getting to my head .

hey y'all, is it just me or does anyone else think we all need like a happiness jar in our crib? i mean, hear me out here - my family is rolling in dough, like seriously; we've got everything a person could want, but there's this weird vibe lingering in the air, like we're missing the secret ingredient to life; you know what i'm saying? it's like those jars folks keep on their kitchen counters for spare change, except i'm thinking, why not fill it with little chunks of happiness instead; moments of joy, laughter, and peace that we stash away and then, when it's one of those gloomy days, we just pull out a piece and remind ourselves that life's not that bad, kinda like a happiness piggy bank, if you will; but it's a bit baffling, don't you think? 'cause money can't buy happiness, right? like, how many trips to exotic islands... or fancy dinners do you need before it's just meh; i mean, did oprah say it best, "the thing you fear most has no power" - maybe it's not fear but the lack of genuine happiness we should fear, ya feel me? but then again, i'm no philosopher, just an average joe laying it down; it's crazy how people always say they envy the wealthy, but could we be the ones truly envious? because despite the stacks of cash, we're like happiness bankrupt, it's wild; maybe what we need is a reality check or a happiness savings account that actually pays interest in smiles and memories; have you noticed, sometimes folks living the simplest lives are the ones with the brightest smiles? so why is that, i wonder – readers, drop your thoughts in the comments or whatever; my crib's filled with all these material things and we throw these big parties, hosted right here in my fancy pad, and smile at each other, but behind closed doors, it's crickets, just dead silence; think on that for a minute; doesn't that resonate or is it just me? or have we been chasing the wrong dream all along, led astray by society's definition of "success"? i mean, if shakespeare were around, would he scribe, "to be rich or to be happy, that is the question"? perhaps what's really golden isn't gold at all but the small, sparkling moments we often overlook, fading into the cracks of our daily grind; so maybe this happiness jar idea ain't too crazy after all; imagine tracking all those moments on little slips of paper and filling up a jar with them, wouldn't that be something special to look back on?; so tell me, if you could fill a jar with happiness, what would you put in it? just a thought i've been playing with, nothing serious; anyhow, thanks for letting me unload this brain-jumble, it's been swirling around in my head like a whirlwind and i thought maybe putting it down would help make sense of it all or at least give me a chuckle ; cheers and peace ✌️.

Tw grooming and suicide

I (15 almost 16) am in a perpetual self imposed hell. my abuser (20 almost 21) showed back up after months of completely abandoning me and you know, I thought that would make me feel better because wow. They kept their promise, they didn’t lie and leave me with this gaping hole in my chest. not really. The months they left were hell, my intrusive thoughts about being groomed quite literally crippled me to the point I commit suicide, got landed in the psychward for a while, and could not return to a normal headspace. I don’t know if i can say it’s worse but it’s not better, well that’s a lie. It’s better in the sense that I feel more normal to know they’re around, suddenly overwhelming intensity of the intrusive thoughts are gone. There’s the illusion that im okay. But now im even more dependent on them than before, while they were away I decided if I got a second chance I would do or give anything to keep them, to the point I’d ditch all my friends and family if they decided they actually loved me again. Currently, as further proof of how serious I am im cheating on my partner (15) for them, and I know I should give my all to someone who actually cares about me, I truly don’t deserve my partner but it feels fundamentally wrong to date anyone who isn’t hurting me. Maybe im just not meant for it. I’m planning to break up with my partner soon because I don’t want to betray them further while parasitically zapping all of their goodwill, but I can’t tell what the right way to do it is. I’m selfishly holding on.

It hurts me so much that I let you do all that shit to me and yet i still feel so disposable to you . Maybe thats how I’ll make my partner feel if they find out about all this shit, and then I’ll really be like my abuser. Am I not doing enough? I try to be interesting and suck up to your every whim, im different than when you left me. im entirely devoted to you, I try to give you space even though it feels like death. Maybe I should be more grateful you’re giving me the time of day at all. Be that 1-3 messages on average. Since we’re both a mistake of human beings this should suffice. Still, everytime you’re cold or short with me I feel so worthless I could genuinely die, I want to. I know you’re tired, I know you’re depressed and can’t talk much but everytime you take hours to respond to me at all I feel like falling deeper into this shitty cycle of shitty people and I know damn well there’s no way I can live a normal life again after this, and I can’t help but doubt the fact that you love me at all. If you leave me I know I’ll have to kill myself, cuz then there’ll be nothing else left to stop my intrusive thoughts from torturing me. I’m so disgustingly miserable it’s insane.

So boom, got a boyfriend, very in love with me, missing me, texting everyday, great intimate moments, sweet all rounded guy. Tho lately, these past couple of days, he's been distant. Then he told me he's bipolar, like diagnosed. Now I was questioning, did he get with me out of mania? I was searching online about people with bipolar and things like "they could cheat or break up with you during an episode" or "they say certain things that aren't logical and you just need to go along with it" and " you can try your best to support but you can't love bipolar away, if you do, your words will go in one ear and out the other, if you're with someone who has bipolar then you'll likely need a therapist" and scary shit like "the disorder will get worse and worse, if they don't take care of it, it will mess with the brain, death."

Then I was like okay, I know he has this, it's okay that he's distant but I was still worried. It hurts but it was also apart of the relationship. I think I'm a very justice-oriented person, hard for me to leave hurt people alone to fend for themselves. I was pouring the best I could into him with support and care, but it all seems kinda useless as sometimes he didn't respond or gave a bit of a dry response which caused me to overthink, like if I did something wrong. That's not all of who he is tho, he's a very great guy, I wanna say the greatest guy I know (I have a past with bad men in general whether family or guys online.) I will add I'm 18 and he's a year older.

Currently? Idk why but he unfriended me and unfollowed me on two separate apps. He didn't say anything, the last thing he said to me was that I was handsome and other kind stuff. Obviously, I've been pretty sad, he really healed me and I loved him, even tho I didn't really realize it because it's not like it's been that long. Tho I'm left wondering, could it be the depressive episode he's in? I searched online and saw stuff like "bipolar ghosting or how interacting can just be exhausting for them." Did he stabilize and realize he didn't wanna be with me and regret everything?

Ughh why did he have to do it so close to Valentine's day, this is embarrassing for me to get dumped like this if that's even the case.

I'm really alone again, he really did make me happy. It's a different type of happiness, like wow I have someone to do things with and we enjoy each other's company.

I also just feel like my family hates me, they didn't say anything and I didn't do anything but I feel like I would be better off gone. It doesn't help that I still have this ugly hairstyle on my head, everyone is telling me to wait it out. Times like this, I wanna do something drastic and impulsive, killing myself would be the most but I'll try to do something more tame. I don't really see anything improving and even if I tried, it wouldn't help as I see this far. I haven't been this close to killing myself, usually it's just passively but now I feel I could actually do it, my next step is figuring out how and writing a letter. Since I'll be doing this, I'll do some impulsive decisions before. I do kinda wanna wait and kill myself at 20 as I feel emotions would hit the most but that's too long. I think I'll probably just be dedicating this year to planning ways to get off this planet. People don't take suicidal people seriously until they're dead anyways so it will allow me to stop whining and just skip to the part where people suddenly care. Don't get me wrong, I try to take care of myself, working out, having hobbies, trying to get out there, putting myself out there, brushing my teeth, showering but none of that can get rid of my mental illness, it seems to be getting worse and just coming back again am again for however long, from either a few days or weeks or hours. I don't expect people here to know how to help me as I know it's a complex and hard problem that I probably should be in a psych ward for. This is just kinda my letter.

Thank you for anyone who reads all this 🩷🖤 Happy Valentine's Day! Remember that this is a day for love of any kind, not just romantic. c: