Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 2

I want to preface this by saying my bf may be undiagnosed neurodivergent and his parents didn’t get him the necessary tools he’d need as an adult so I do empathize with that… but I won’t make this long but I will also try to be as detailed as I can. Me and my bf met on Facebook and we have been together every day since our first date. This was new for me so shacking up almost immediately wasn’t on my bingo card for sure but it worked. There were a lot of things we went through together and separate where we had to be there for one another.. we have been together practically three years and he doesn’t know how to really communicate well or express his emotions well and I am a very vocal person but sometimes the deliverance isn’t the best I can account for that but I like to talk and he shuts down. Says I’m always arguing or trying to “debate” when I see it simply as communicating. So we never really talk. Like have deep meaningful conversations. I have to almost beg to be cuddled sometimes like he is affectionate at times but certain time I have to direct it. Which I am not a physical person myself so I get it but he should see I love to cuddle if I like asking but he always seems to make it seem like a chore to do it .. he also has grabbed me by my face arms once by the neck.. and wrists.. he’s not all bad he doesn’t cheat he does anything for me but idk I think I know the answer I just want someone else to weigh in on it. The fact im ashamed to discuss it with friends and family says it all..

I’m 31, Male, single, no kids. I feel like im at the edge of bridge just waiting to jump. I’m so fucking angry all the time. I really hate the way my life has turned out. I’ve lost every ounce of happiness in my body.

I hate the way I feel I hate the way I live. I’m so tired of it.

I only feel depressed and angry with a short fuse all the time. I’m living with my grandparents and my mother, because my grandparents are in their 80s and my grandfather is going through stages of dementia. It’s sad to see and deal with. He constantly walks around the house looking lost. He can’t do much anymore but is still active (goes grocery shopping, the doctors). He gets confused about basic shit all the time, and we are constantly having to explain the same things over and over again. He’s always trying to do physical work but has 0 strength in his hands. I have to help him all the time, with everything. Now I’m not mad at him for asking for help. But I feel frustrated all the time because I’m trying to balance my life at the same time. I was long time alcoholic/addict. I haven’t drank in 5 years. But I quit smoking weed again about 3 weeks ago.

I’ve been in construction for 10 years and the last 5 have been a blessing and a fucking nightmare. I worked for a small shop, only 5-10 guys max and we have to do everything and we’ve had constant problems, whether it be the guys installing shit wrong and I’m fixing it. The project manager not ordering the correct materials, setting unrealistic goals like being at 2 or 3 different places in the same day to measure, install, make deliveries, all sorts of shit. And when he’s wrong, it’s not as simple as saying “hey this showed up, it’s not enough or this is the wrong part” no you have to build a whole case to PROVE he was wrong. We hit a rough patch the last 2 years because of a piss poor installer, that was their baby, he was stealing hours, installing shit wrong all the time. Never gave a fuck about anything. We fired him and then fired a superintendent that was an asshole to everyone. There have been only 4 guys in the field. And it’s been trying to play catch up, fixing all the problems, trying to take on new jobs, dealing with everything. It never stops and hasn’t. We are all burnt out big time. And it got bad enough to where me and another guy got laid off back in November, and there’s only our foreman and one leadman doing all the work. And the PM just takes time off whenever he wants. So shit isn’t and can’t get done.

I’m pissed off without a job and pissed off with one.

Into my personal life. I quit drinking, quit smoking. I don’t do shit anymore I used to skate when I was younger and go out frequently with my friends. I was only going to work and going home these last 5 years. Barely went on any vacation. And now I just feel so lonely and abandoned, none of my friends invite me to do anything anymore. Like for example my best friend hasn’t called me or anything in months, the last time he called he just wanted to use my truck to help him move into his new apartment, and same for my cousin, haven’t heard from him for months and just called to use my truck. And when I’ve called for help “busy”. Pieces of shit, they don’t remember years ago, when I used to drive them around everywhere, take them to work when they didn’t have a car, listen to all their hardships over the phone. Now when I really need it the most they are busy dealing with life. We fucking all are we all have problems. I’m just so angry at them now. My best friend chooses his Gen Z 20 year old co workers to hangout with. My cousin and his gf (known her for 25 years) is still best friends with my ex gf who was a cheater, mentally ill schizophrenic (not being a dick, she actually is) hooked on Xanax, accusing me of cheating all the time. Constant fighting, multiple 5150s, and just all sorts of shit. It was hell. And I still have dreams about her and it drives me crazy me nuts. When I got sober, I got counseling and therapy and talked about all of this. Why does it still haunt me almost 10 years later?

I feel so scared for my future and everything going on all at the same time. I have constant anxiety, depression and just anger. It makes me not want to do anything but just stay inside but that drives me nuts to. I walk my dog 5 miles everyday, I workout a few times a week. I try to cook all my food from scratch. I try to play video games. I just started reading books again. But it seems like nothing helps. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I feel so fucking alone and so much stress and pressure. I wish I had friends again or gf but I really don’t want to experience anymore bullshit right now.

If this was a hard read for people I’m sorry, my mind is all over the place. I haven’t done anything about these feelings in years just being a man and dealing with it. I was just trying to put as many thoughts out there on paper to help alleviate this feeling. This is my first post idk how this site works yet. Im an open book, I’ll answer any questions you may have. Thanks for reading my jumbled mess.

Okay so basically there's this girl called Megan and im friends with her sister, Tegan. They're twins btw. Megan has been getting my friend group into trouble for YEARS. The way she would do that was by bothering me and my friends and Tegan has a very short temper, so she would always tell Megan to stop and then Megan would cry crocodile tears to the teachers and make it seem like Tegan was bothering her. Now recently, me and my friend were talking and we saw Megan teaching someone how to do the Gabriela hands. Me and my friend absolutely HATE Megan, so I said to my friend "wow Erica's doing better than Megan" (which is a really shitty thing to say). I know that I sound really mean, but if you added up all the times that Megan was meant to me vs all the times I was mean to Megan, Megan would win by a landslide.then she heard me say that and then she went up to me and said "you dont always have to say something". after that she told her friends. her friends went up to me and started questioning me about if I said that to Megan. I was super nervous, so I just started fidgeting with my stress ball and I didnt say anything. This was during our 1st lunch break. when it was the second lunch break, Megan and her friend came up to me and my friends and started saying stuff like "hey bestie" to me. Tegan got SUPER angry and she started arguing with Megan. I kept telling Tegan to stop escalating the situation because she was making it worse for me. She didnt listen. After the bell rang, Megan's friend, Zara, told me to apologise, so I did. Megan said "I dont forgive you". So then when we went inside she told a teacher. so then. I was outside in the hallway with Megan, my homeroom teacher and Megan's homeroom teacher. The teachers started teaching me like a sociopath, who has no empathy. they were asking me questions like "do you think people don't have feelings?". Megan was crying crocodile tears again and she would constantly interupt me when I was talking. Megan's homeroom teacher then had the audacity to say "and of course Zara was being a good friend telling (my name) to apologise". which honestly just made me want to throw a chair at her. after getting harassed by 2 grown women, I went to the bathroom and started crying. Now, there have been a lot of times when my teacher would yell at me for doing normal stuff. like I was packing up for home time like everyone else and my teacher was just like "(my name) and (my friends name) stop packing up!" when literally everyone else was packing up. So then my mom had a chat with my teacher and told her about all the times that Megan has been two faced. After that my teacher was nicer to me, but even nicer to Megan. im also on the student council so I was judging for the talent show and when we told her who we picked for 3rd, 2nd and 1st place, she forced us to make Megan 4th place so that Megan would get a prize. I've honestly always felt like I dont belong here since im an immigrant and that teachers just aren't nice to me at all. like im a smart kid, im not usually mean, I dont ever misbehave and im always trying hard in class, so I dont get what makes teachers hate me. am I just overreacting?

i kinda have to use politics for this story, pls dont read if you're just gonna argue down below!!

i have an older brother, theres a 5 year difference between the two of us. our dad passed away almost three years ago but thats not when i first noticed my brother's opinions.

for context, we both live in our mom's house. mom has always been the bread winner and provider in our family, since my dad was an alcoholic and rarely contributed. the only thing i feel is important to mention is that mom can be aloof and cold. shes very 'stoic' in that sense.

back during covid, when andrew tate blew up, i noticed my bro watching him a lot, which concerned me. i spoke to my mom about it and she clearly didnt care.

since then, he's collected the 'basic' far right beliefs like pokemon. i assume you know what i mean, stuff like 'women are emotional, men are logical', 'women cook and clean and men provide', 'men are dominant and women are submissive'. which is ironic but whatever.

he has a history of being weird to (girl) friends i bring over, he claims to have several women and calls himself a pimp, etc.

recently, presidential elections took place where we live (not US elections), and he was very open about voting for the far right candidate. mom scolded him. whenever she scolds him, he acts like a puppy but quietly keeps his mindset if that makes sense.

im certain he's depressed. he doesnt shower, (and when he does, he only uses water because soap is for women and it would raise his 'estrogen' and make him 'a little bitch' im so deadass) he only leaves his room to go the gym, he doesnt sleep, he drinks hella energy drinks.

recently, he's been reposting concerning stuff on tiktok and instagram; things that point to body dysmorphia, testosterone, steroid use, that type of stuff, on top of the usual degrading misogynistic stuff.

my mom knows all this, she just doesnt seem to really care (?). i mean, he is a grown man. its also no secret that he was neglected growing up. (we both were, but i imagine he had it worse being the older sibling) the thing is that ive been very forward about seeking help. i pestered my mom about therapy, psychiatrist, antidepressants, all that. i also got my brother to see a therapist a couple of times and the therapist recommended he goes to the psychiatrist and seeks a more serious treatment, at which point everyone in our family collectively agreed that he doesnt need anything like that. nobody even asked him what he thinks.

i'm convinced if nobody does anything, he'll die from either suicide or heart problems (from energy drinks and possibly steroids, tho im not positive on that one)

im very worried about him, and really frustrated that nobody else seems to notice. ive spoken to him before, there were instances where he talked a little bit about how he was treated growing up and my instinct was to call it cringe and leave, but i shut my bitchass up and listened. there were also instances where i asked questions and only got an 'idunno' in return. and of course there's the instances where he claims i wouldnt understand anything because im a girl.

the way he thinks is very black and white, very binary, is what i noticed.

please let me know if anything is unclear, and feel free to ask questions since theres stuff im probably forgetting rn.

i'll take advice from anyone but im particularly interested to hear any young men speak on this if possible

thanks for reading!

Honestly just wondering, at what point is it enough to say that there's no reason to be alive. I feel like I could probably achieve some of the things that I may have wanted in the past, but I genuinely think I'd just rather kill myself.

Between interpersonal success and self actualization, I'd say those are the only things which could motivate me to keep living, but I just don't think it's practical to expect anything from myself in the kind of timeline that would make it worthwhile. I deal with paranoia, autism, panic disorder, BPD, OCD, and a very faint sense of identity. I have creative hobbies like art, music, learning about different cultures, studying languages and learning about history, but none of them would lead me to a stable job. As far as physical health, I've been struggling to gain weight and put on muscle due to diet and I hesitate to make changes to my diet due to my OCD. I consider myself average to unattractive as far as looks go, and I honestly don't even care because I hate others more than enough not to care what they think. I'm not on speaking terms with my mother, my father and both of my sisters rarely speak to me even though they claim to care about me, I have a couple of online friends from high school but I don't speak to them often either. I'm in a couple of communities at my university but in all of them I'm basically the guy that no one knows how to approach.

Until now, I'd wanted to change the world for people like me who are struggling despite having had some kind of potential, but idk, I'm tired. I know that people like me never get anywhere in life, that I've never had a stable relationship in my life and that puts me years behind everyone else developmentally. I know that I've had enough bad experiences that I'd just rather save myself the regret and hide in my room all day, but at that point I'll just be doing myself a favor by letting myself rest instead of continuing to deteriorate.

I'm young, I've been told that I'm an intelligent person and that I have a lot of things going for me, but every time I try to act on the smallest ambition I have, I regret it. I could very feasibly get a girlfriend this year or in the next couple months. I could very feasibly get a part-time job to start working on my resume. I could very feasibly talk to program administers about the projects I've wanted to do after graduating and get real support on those, but I don't really care. Modern dating sucks and though I'd like to have someone, chances are they disappoint me or disgust me like everyone else, and I don't ever really buy myself anything so I'd only be working to be out of my dorm. I don't even really care at this point about changing the world, people like me shouldn't exist. I wanted to create a world where no one like me would have to exist but everyone like me is probably just gonna kill themselves anyway.

I regret my life. I gave myself a suicide date when I was 14 and said I'd wait until I was 28 (I figured my life already sucked enough then that I'd give myself another 14 years just to see), but genuinely, why would I? I feel so far behind everyone else that something as basic as going outside gives me panic attacks. Everyone who tries to help me ultimately gets pushed away by my paranoia and I just don't have a place in society unless I go out and create one for myself which takes time, effort and skill which would mean that one way or another I lose out on my entire youth getting to the point where I would have been if I hadn't been neglected or born with these issues. I'm in therapy and it overall hasn't helped me to do any of the things I need to do.

I don't want to keep playing the "if only" game. It is what it is and I want to stop being forced to pretend that one day I'll live a normal life. Lemme know if this counts for a good enough reason to kms.

Just to sign off I miss my friend a lot. She was the last person I think I could trust and I'm debating whether or not having her cut me off last year was a good enough last straw.

I've been feeling this for quite a while..it's like getting worse and worse. The mechanisms I turn to in order to not kill myself hasn't worked. I've been passively suicidal for months but I think I'm at the stage where I wanna plan. Idk, I've been trying not to be this way. I've been trying to look for friends, take care of myself, have goals, do school, whatever I'm supposed to do. Yet my mental illness is still here, coping without solving the actual issue. It doesn't matter how clean I am or how toned my muscles get.

I've seen others have support systems during dark times like this, idk how they did that but I've tried and all I really got was romantic or sexual attention, I don't post myself at all so idk why. I just wanna rest and pass way. I could fly. I wanna go in a peaceful way tho. I should probably go chat a hotline but idk if this is really an emergency, Its not like I have a plan yet or a way to kill myself yet. I've just been feeling like this everyday and idk how to stop.

If anyone has advice or reasons to live then do share. 🩷🖤

helloo!! I haven't used this website before so sorry if my story gets boring or messy. I'm currently in year 12 (11th grade i think) and i feel like none of my hard work will surmount to anything. I got the highest grade in my year for GCSEs (final exams) and my family was rly proud of me. I was actually shocked, i thought i would do average. i did a lot of studying but i wasn't sure whether it was effective enough until then. Although this sounds like good news, i still feel like im not going to get into a good university or anyhting. i do have decent academic skills, but my social skills are simply terrible. im rly awkward, and although i have a couple of rly close friends and a bf, i feel like no one else rly likes me. i don't get bullied, but everyone seems to look at me with disgust or maybe even pity. i feel like im jsut bothering everyone by being in school. tbh, the reason i work so hard in school is not just for other ppl's approval, but because i just want to make up for how boring and quiet i am. maybe then i can get a job when im older, but atm it seems unlikely. i can barely hold a conversation, and when i get overwhelmed/stressed in school my face tenses up and i look rly pissed off/sad when im not. no one wants to hire that. plus, it feels like not many ppl even care abt my grades. although the headmaster said i got the highest grades, he gave the "highest grades" awards to two other ppl who are more popular than me. i guess it shows not even the school wants me on stage in front of people. i do sound abt too whiny, i know: i do still feel as if the work i put in will be worth it in the end. but i cant stand how i act in school, i jsut feel like i cant help it. it sounds dramatic, but it feels like my mouth literally sews shut in front of other ppl. how do i fix this?? i just want to stop being so miserable and jealous of others. i dont need to make new friends, i just wish i was approachable anough for ppl to talk to me. sorry, i know its very difficult to respond to soemthing like this. i just wanted to vent mostly. thank u for reading x

I now believe that dream jobs are a waste of time. This is why I have thrown out being an astronomer, and graphic designer. I have dream jobs for a reason. Because I won’t actually pursue them. I won’t pursue them whether it’s because I dislike math and don’t want to work in a math heavy field or if I enjoy the product more than the process, and because it is a low percent chance I’ll actually achieve it in a period of the world where hard work doesn’t guarantee anything and most likely won’t get you what you want . if I were to consider people facing doubts and similar obstacles I can only understand how a few of them get their dream job. It’s better to not waste my time and existence on dream jobs and get a job I have a significantly higher chance of getting.

I don't have a personality, its like my whole self is built up on my friends and they hate me for it and tbh I hate myself for it more

I just had an intense argument with my mom, which led me to cry in the closet room for almost an hour. I don't want to go through the details of what happened. Let's just say one small thing lead to whole chaos. I thought about me and hers relationship together and I wondered if she actually cares about me. Ig she argued with me like she didn't, still, it hurt. Bc she's never actually listened to what I have to say. She always goes off rambling about whatever expecting to listen through. Then a few hours later, my dad rages over my brother like the hundredth time and beats him with a belt. Somehow, I got involved with his scolding bc the pathaway to my door was a mess with books and papers (it wasn't really mess, more like random stuff on the floor bc there's a bookshelf outside of my door) and he always has to include something hurtful and unnecessary to his scoldings. The worst part about all this is when it ends, bc when it does, it seems like everything goes back to normal, except now I'm a mental wreck contemplating about why sin did I committed in a past life to get emotionally and psychological abused by two emotionally self absorded nitwits who talk their asses off like they get paid for every sentence that say. I honestly thought about ending my life, I've been thinking about it for a long time now but its more of a traumatic response that something constant. But I'm really considering it now since I feel trapped in my parents' home and running away seems too terrifying to me. I just wished that they acc made an effort to care about me as an individual but ofc, they have like 5 other children to take care of, which they had WILLINGLY, so who gives a shit about their children's mental wellbeing.

Hi, I'm just turning 19 this year and finally making decent friends. Never really had friends so most things that happened in my childhood got deemed as 'normal' and pushed aside. until now. I was telling this one story to my friend about how my mom used to handle conflict between me and my sister and she told me it was basically abuse. I waved it off cause like in my mind my mom had done way worse then that so if the worst wasn't abuse how was this abuse? anyway I'll tell you all the story and see what you all think.

So it started with me and my sister. So me and my little sister are 6 years apart (im the oldest). My mom always forced us to play together even if we had completely different interests cause 'sisters play together'. whatever, we played together. But we'd always get into fights. so my mom came up with a new rule, anytime our arguments got out of hand and disturbed whatever she'd be doing we'd each need to pick a toy out of our separate favourite toy bins and throw them out. She'd make us throw them out while she watched then she'd burry whatever it was at the bottom of the garbage bag and tie off the bag and put it in the garage so we couldn't go dig it out later.

This went on for like 2 years. I was 7 when I remember it starting. it only ended when I was 9 cause I freaked out and in my mind I thought I upset my mom and that's why she stopped.

The last time she did it my sister and I were arguing and she was done with it. but instead of making us choose a toy she took away a huge bin of stuffed animals we had in the basement and said she was throwing the whole thing out that weekend. it was Tuesday. I only remember it was Tuesday cause I cried for three days straight. Only cause my favourite stuffed animal, a unicorn my great aunt gave me before she died, was in the bin.

I begged and cried for three days. three. told my mom I'd clean or do more chores or anything but she wouldn't budge. went to school crying, sat at home crying, even cried in bed cause at that time I slept with that unicorn overnight and now I didn't have it.

finally on Friday my mom randomly comes into my room, gives me the unicorn without a word and she never did the throw out rule again.

I didn't know why she stopped, I just guessed it didn't work how she wanted so she moved on to something new.

But my friend says this is really bad and I didnt' know. Like I genuinely thought this was normal and now im really confused and questioning my whole life???

Let me know what any of you think, I'm really hoping for some outside input here.

So my brother is apparently 'sick' but my mom doesnt believe him, so she told him that he was going to school instead of staying home. my brother kept on saying that he wasn't. me and my brother share a room btw. i was getting in some extra sleep while my mom and my brother were arguing, since I was ready by 7:10 am so I still had a good 30 minutes to sleep. when I woke up my mom called me down for breakfast. when I went downstairs I saw cereal witb honey on it, but there was a really small amount of milk. I genuinely cant eat foods if I dont like the look of it and I told my mom that I didnt want to eat it. my mom started yelling at me to start eating it. then my dad came in and started yelling at me. I told my mom that im sorry but I still dont wanna eat it. after that my mom threw the bowl of cereal at the table (it didnt break). she was just screaming at me about how much of a brat I was and then she threw the bowl of cereal into the sink. I just ran upstairs and started crying. then she told me to come down because I still need to eat. when I came downstairs and she saw that I was crying she just started acting like she wasnt the one screaming at me. she was hugging me and saying "dont cry sweetie". when I kept crying she started yelling again and then went back to comforting me. she gave me some leftover banana bread, but I was only able to eat an ⅛ of it since I was crying so much that I lost my appetite. after my mom dropped me off at school I went up to my friends. I was trying not to cry, but I just started crying infront of my friends. they were very confused and just stood there silently. after my classes it was time for lunch break and I told my friends why I was crying in the morning. they never gave their opinion on the situation, so do I have a right to be mad at my mom?

So It's been like 20 days since Iast uploaded. I have a girlfriend now, officially it has been 9 days. My feelings for my other friend have subsided but I can't tell for sure if they're gone or not. That's not the problem though. The last person I dated had a rough relationship with me. It's fully on me. It was off and on a lot for the last like 10 months. It was nothing about her really I guess I'm just used to more excitement and she was very limited because of her family being so religious. I tried to make it work but all we could do was text and draw really. So I decided to break it off fully in December last year. It was fine for a few days but she started acting like we were dating again. I had already made it clear why I wanted to break up and made sure that she understood. I was held up to these standards and pressures, I know she didn't mean to be controlling in any way. But it was like "We're going to go to the same college after four years of dating." "We're going to stay virgins and not have our first kiss until we meet irl." Which is fine there's nothing wrong with it but like I said I'm used to having a lot of chaos and fun and excitement. She also would kind of age play a little at times which would gross me out. I don't even want kids when I'm older and you're acting like a four year old it's not cute it's disgusting. But I also still love her so much... I want to tell her these things but she's also a very sweet person and I had to assure her a lot to make sure that she believed her love wasn't too much for anyone. She self blames a lot. I've been kind of ghosting her and she still sends goodmorning texts and goodnight texts every day. She tells me how she misses me and stuff. I wasn't very big on PDA and pet names but something about her made me comfortable with that stuff I feel like I'm at a constant war with my feelings and I just met some of her family and friends.

My family adopted a cat in december, well she adopted us. And I wanna know how to make great games for her because sometimes she seems a little bit bored.

I'm working since november in a new job and at first I tought that it would more than the same but now I really like it and I'm really glad to be there. But now I have to travel in february with My family for almost three weeks and I'm kinda sad and guilty because I don't wanna leave this workplace and I know for sure that they're going to fire me. So, I don't know what to say or do... And I can't delay the flight because it was too expensive and my family bought it in october.