Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 5

So, you know how when you're a teenager, your brain is rewiring itself as well? Like, your prefrontal cortex is very slowly maturing, unlike the amygdala with already matures. That means since the amygdala is a very emotional and hyperactive organ, it causes us to do more impulsive things than rational ones. No wonder at 13 I feel so angry, reckless, sad and anxious. Those emotions are shameful, they make me savage and horrid. I wish I had better control of myself. It makes me focus on one thing, usually shallow stuff, and forget the other, like an idiot. That's why I finish certain homework and not some. That's why say something horrible and regret it. I hate my brain, I wish I was more mature and less angry and chaotic. I've heard certain drugs like Xanax work as they reduce amygdala activity and soothe you, make you more relaxed and less anxious. They do that, right? And I heard that cutting my skin works by releasing endorphins, which will also soothe me. I hate my body, I hate how ugly and out of control I am right now. The drugs and cutting will fix me, in theory, they work I just know it. So please, I don't think I'm shameful, I think I'll be smart and lucky and not get addicted.

Facebook is beyond belief. You can't say anything through it. I was just talking about those feelings that are contradictory to advocating for good ideals, and it itself put it up for review. Such an extremely valuable text, it itself put it up for review. It's a question that I found totally offensive.

How could they do that? I feel like with Facebook, you can't write anything, because in principle, no one knows why it puts things up for review. It doesn't mention anything about what I published; it just leaves you at the mercy of uncertainty. I used to vent on Facebook, but over time, I stopped doing that. Frankly, I don't want to post posts like the one I made in WhatsApp groups, after reflecting, because I find it disruptive, and I like to post a lot.

Putting up with Facebook cutting off a post without explanation is harassing. You expect it to remain a post, even more so when it's barely published and doesn't say anything about it being annoying or anything like that. It takes you by surprise. You want to publish in peace, but you don't know what mistakes you made to sustain that. Besides, in such posts, I express my creativity; I'm not attacking anyone or spreading hate speech or anything like that. They're simply creative posts, nothing more, even pleasant stories, for enjoyment, rich reading, and everything is in groups, where that's what they're for. The platform is pulling my hair out; I mean, I need a space to share what I want to publish calmly, and Facebook isn't providing it, even though it gives the false illusion that it is.

I don't know if Facebook or people are worse. What I publish often seems like an attack on prejudice, a search to break molds, to make people think within intimacies that are not socially undermined, and therefore people, at least those around me, feel incapable of being receptive, even though I've heard good comments about it. Facebook is the one I find most receptive, however, despite these surprises, I didn't find it pleasant. I continue to insist that it's the worst not knowing why your post, unexpectedly once again, is being sent for review, especially after someone put so much effort into such texts, because they wanted them to be pleasant, and also exposed to a general audience. I feel it's a way of harming my creativity, I have to say it this way, of making me feel insecure when it comes to publishing.

When I publish myself, I express myself, I vent, I can't go around with fears, or checking to see if my post was deleted or not. This anxiety is exhaustive, and also unfair. I revise my texts very thoroughly, and I also like that what I write is absolutely divine for the reader, and it helps me with my writing. When Facebook sends it for review, it's like feeling like my effort is completely set aside, that such divine art is spit out after having been arduously worked on. It's feeling like the platform treats what you've done in a completely dehumanizing way. Furthermore, in the groups, it appears that the administrator will review it, and they don't agree. This, well, since they and I are strangers, barely through online contact, only triggers problems; saying that Facebook played a trick sounds like an excuse.

Facebook, more than serving as a benefit for publishing and sharing content, is becoming a completely uncomfortable platform. I'd like to discover better platforms, but I also don't want to just go changing because I've already established my life there, virtually. Besides, this isn't happening because of others, but because of the platform itself. I also feel the helplessness of not being able to do anything about it, that the platform can send what I publish back for review in a completely arbitrary way, as I feel it has done with me up until now.

I've seen more than one person complaining about Facebook censorship. At the same time, I feel a sensitivity on the part of the platform that makes readings of the content extremely superficial. However, here I am considering the potential consequences of the platform's actions, but it's a futile effort. It never ceases to appear, naturally, because I am a human being. Before, I felt safe and secure on this platform, but all I feel like doing is moving to another platform, any one, just to avoid these surprises.

I have this brother who is my twin. Everyone looks up to him, he has perfect looks, personality, work ethic and grades etc. But no one realises who he actually is. He's only a selfish prick who puts himself higher than anyone else. He's a raging misogynist and racist. A typical teenager boy.

I remember in the past, he used to beat me up at home during lockdown when our parents were at work. He used to punch me at full strength in to stomach and he used to kick my head every time I didn't listen to him/beat him at tests in school. Ultimately, this lead to me almost failing tests as my grades slipped in fear that he'd beat me up and that I was essentially conditioned to listen him at every word and defending him for his actions at my own expense because at that point, I would rather be punished by someone else.

Once I got into highschool (we went to different schools), I could finally achieve my own goals without interference until I realised that after a few years of almost failing classes, it took a toll on compulsory skills in school such as maths and English.

I always dreaded coming back home until some time had passed and I realised my brother seemingly changed. He was nicer, more composed, less envious. I took this for granted until he started blaming me for him losing all his matches online. He ended up beating me more, and I complained to our parents after I had finally built up some courage from school. But my parents never believed me, because 'how could a perfect boy like him beat his lesser achieving sister like that?'. They called me a liar and a shame to the family for not being able to defend myself & for being 'weak'.

After that a few years later, my brother wanted me to hang out with him, so I did, without any question. My brother changed, he didn't hit me as much and he actually talked to me. At the time, I genuinely thought it was so nice of him to invite me, but then I realised only now that he invited me to make himself look better and to embarrass me.

Nowadays, it's just less of the abuse and more me doing everything for him without question or request because I'm too scared to do anything to offend him. I think I might have ptsd from him but oh well.

I wish I was him, I'm so envious of him.

You gotta do what u gotta do even if it's dumb to protect your peace 😆😆😆😆

idk what I have done but he was earlier distanced and reply frequency decreases, yesterday we had conversation which he Waited me for a while and we had break. I asked him to give his final decision in the coming Thursday but I had already accepted it as a breakup.

i frustrated at his gay friend who is not interested in him according to my bf but he call late night because his gay friend was having bad time and made me wait.

I'm pissed and trying to move on but his memory pin me down from where I have started and now I hope he gets back and grow out relationship with me together.

I'm not religious. I've been atheist for years but going to church camp for the first time made me almost convert back to Christianity. Just for clarity, my friend asked me to go to camp and since I had never been, I agreed. During this time I started questioning my faith. Though many things were currently going on in my life and at one point I hit my breaking point, which I knew would happen sooner or later and I tried to kill myself. This is what I wrote a month after when remembering it.

Here I am, turning to whatever higher power there is and praying, begging, and on my knees breaking down, asking for salvation. All of my prayers have been met with silence, just like they were previously. My faith which I no longer claimed has betrayed me again. If he won't save me, I'll save myself. I'll bring myself deliverance from this wretched life.

I don't like the feeling of being unsure whether at work or personal life. I want someone to always assures me that everything is ok we will be here forever or I'm here I am claiming you not demand to someone for loyalty yet you cannot claim someone and just be pushing them under the bus the next . I want assurance then if I have it u can give you my loyalty

TW!! abuse, neglect, sh,

when I was a kid, my dad was very abusive towards my brother and myself. I can still remember that all so vividly. like I just saw it. I remember getting beaten for not wanting to eat, I remember the ride to the police station. I remember it all. I don't remember, however, turning up at my grandparents house. we got sent to live with them due to our mother and father being not suitable parents. and for as long as I remember I would always be forgotten. when they all took a two week trip they decided last minute I shouldn't go. when we were going to a carnival, they decided that since they didn't want to have to deal with me I shouldnt come. its been a constant cycle of this sort of thing, they used to only care if I got hurt when they needed and excuse to be mad at my brother. the guilttripping was and still is so bad. In my first year of high school, my mental health got really bad and I was hanging around the wrong crowd who convinced me to hurt myself, and told me ways to do it. so when I realized this was a bad thing and told one of my favourite teachers, they rang my parents. my pop picked me up, and kept asking "why would you do that." as if I was inconveniencing him. and when I got home the took my devices. they didn't ask what happened, they didn't care. they didn't check to see if I was still harming myself. they just said "if community services finds out you do this they'll take you away." and for months they treated me like I was a majorly unintelligent person. when I did get my phone back they would turn my wifi off all the time. I was only allowed one hour, and then the next term or so, my ex boyfriend sexually assaulted me. when I told them, they ignored me. they refused to acknowledge that happened. they treat me like I'm inconvencing their lives by existing. if I told them anything about my identity they would kill me. they didn't care who was hitting on me. they didn't care who was hurting me, they don't care if I'm being bullied. and they only notice the results of these things and blame it on my phone. multiple times I would cry just loud enough for them to hear. hoping they would comfort me and they would just tell me to shut up.

I really find it weird that my financial situation should be an issue or where I stay or whatever... People should stop making such a big deal out of it unless they wanna settle down with me or some sht. Why would do that to someone you don't even have any interest with? Fcking ars. They should just mind their own business unless they wanna settle down with me all the background checks is useless!!! Wtf

Can I be able to be a good writer if I'm not into reading books too much? I like reading poetry, but sometimes I feel like I don't understand it either. I love reading short stories with big pictures, but long stories? So far, not my style.

But I love writing poetry tho and I do merely as a hobbie not like a job or something. But what if one day I wanna publish something just to earn a little bit of money?

I recently wrote a post on Facebook, and it censored me, considering the very elements I needed to bring to light regarding events in my family. I had to post it in a WhatsApp group to avoid falling into the same trap as the previous platform.

That hurt me completely. For a long time, I had sought out the public eye about what had happened with my family, my experiences, and what it meant to me to lose them as a safe zone. As usual, I was another one of those individuals who kept what happened at home to themselves, normalizing the situation over time, even though the outside world showed me a completely different normality than what I experienced at home and through family interactions.

I was one of those who expressed that what I saw on television and other media outlets was solely to sell propaganda. In fact, they even convinced me that Children's Day was purely a commercial component. In that family, I lived isolated from the world. That is, I couldn't bring friends home, I couldn't choose what the market demanded, I had to stick to the music my parents liked, I didn't go to places other people went too, and everything was always driven by a desire to view family relationships and events as supreme and as beings that simply err. It was a desire to justify why we didn't go out and interact with the outside world. My mother lived with a desire for home, and besides, she felt that it was hers and she could do whatever she wanted, with my father backing her up, which made me feel like I couldn't belong anywhere outside the home like my own. My moments when I felt closest to people, where I could joke around and play games, surrounded by my parents, were always segregated, denigrated, and even seen as reasons for scolding for issues that were never really addressed; in fact, they ruined the moment for me.

Regarding my abilities, it was also the same. In sales, creativity, studies, and lifestyle, my mother liked to call the shots, belittling points of view other than her own and also seeking to alleviate the fact that she didn't know the true path either, as a way of making her perspective supreme. My father always told me to blindly accept her, and that was also the case with his second wife. In both homes, my university studies were sabotaged through the absorption of both families due to my absence from their events. It always turned out to be a family that sought to sabotage my progress or make it difficult, only to then applaud any achievement despite everything, in other words, evading the responsibility of having reached the goal under pressure.

They all turned out to be a family of monsters, of people who also wanted to profit monetarily from my progress if it was achieved, without any limitations. They were saboteurs and, on top of that, profiteers. Added to this, they liked to speak ill of me behind my back, gang up on me, and favor their compliance. Without a doubt, they wanted me down, adding to their support for individuals who wanted to harm me, and also avoiding news about it. The only reason they currently act with respect is because I show the consequences of their actions. Their desire as good individuals lies only in preventing them, because if there aren't any, they resort to the same practice. Ironically, being the instigators of the events, they also sought complacency despite their reactions. They were people who sought to see me down and not feel guilty thanks to me, demonstrating precisely the consequences of their actions.

Right now, I find myself in conditions I like, and they have also been the target of attack, through sabotage from outside, intended to make me a destabilizing factor in the environment. I wanted to confront them with therapists, but they all became counters to my need to vent, consolidating me on the ground. To ensure that these relatives wouldn't be invasive in my search for a therapist given my reactions, I needed to find someone who would express the end of therapy by agreeing to return if it was deemed necessary, as is often the case, in order to put an end to that path. Even the therapists turned away, forcing me to be manipulative in order to escape their clutches. Of course, when there's no outside support and internal pressure is great, social solutions based on outside support only end up being maladaptive.

The fact that Facebook censored, or at least reviewed, my post made me feel like there was no way out. No therapist wanted to help me, and I didn't have a social network. They only sought to persuade me to repair my problems the point. That is, to form a vision that was once again complacent and disarmed, at the mercy of others, just as my parents wanted. It's not fair that I was in this very complex situation, a psychological framework, and everyone was collaborating to consolidate me there, that is, diverting me from my interests. No one wanted to help me; all those who tried simply based their help on criticizing me, instead of protecting themselves with my circumstances. Not one was able to admit that they couldn't help me. I had to say goodbye to all these people.

I had to let go of all the lives I had built, given that they were at the mercy of a profile that would try to pressure me to return to it, when I didn't want to return. Now has been an escape from the influences of that environment I was in, allowing me to function completely normally, the mechanisms even being unconscious, simply by letting myself be guided by intuition.

Furthermore, with the posts I'd already made about my family, I felt pained because no one gave a like or any icon that expressed receptivity. In other words, when it came to talking about the issues my family had asked me, I felt alone. I felt like everyone was once again supporting my consolidation of it, being indifferent to how I treated them, all in order to support the stereotypes. I had to take a risk, removing many family members from the mix, the goal of which was to get me out of my peaceful life, through such support and meetings, which no one had even asked me about. An aunt, excited precisely by having me at the mercy of domination, through fear—of all people in the world—wondered, why do I have to be pleasing to those who would like to dominate? Of course, this was the spirit of my parents with my upbringing, of subjugation so they could then make us their servants. It's an abuse of power to isolate an innocent child through prejudice, to keep them at the mercy of complacency, precisely because of the prejudices that create walls that hide what's going on within the family.

Without a doubt, from childhood until now, all of this has resulted in a nightmare for me. I wanted to reveal myself to this system and was prevented, then I returned but was also undermined, and now this third time, I wasn't going to allow myself to be left behind. I prefer to start over, without these relationships, no matter what. Regarding therapists, there's nothing more unpleasant than coming to them with your problem, and they simply seek to smooth it over, rather than affirming that they can't handle it. Personally, I don't see that it has motivated me to take action on my own, through my own visions; after all, they were the only ones that helped me feel good.

I had to look after my life, my future, because no one else was doing it. Indeed, no one supported her, however, that only tells me that these people are not the right ones for me.

In this world, we cannot deign to speak about the family as we see fit; instead, we must use a pre-established discourse regarding it, as it is precisely a terrain where experience is entirely personal. It is a joy to establish a normality through which to generalize all the experiences of all individuals within their families for their maintenance within society.

Such normality often proves completely detached, suffocating, and rather leads to viewing our family in a blind way and being permissive with its ways of operating. This normalization is proving to be a game of exclusion for those who fail to fit in, which translates into the absence of relationships based on maintaining this profile. In itself, it is encouraging the creation of criminals or suicides. There are authorities for these, however, the key is not to fall into such traps.

The society in which we operate creates extremely precise profiles, which leads to redefining the version of family members. An environment where illegal acts become routine encourages members, thanks to their surroundings, encouraging them to reflect on more complex practices, which society and the authorities face with greater difficulty, leading to imposed solutions that appear feasible at first. This spirit itself is leading to the creation of micro-states, isolated groups eager to dominate society, clearly seeking acceptance of their characteristics beyond their usual borders. In other words, this normalization is leading to discreet reactionary actions. It is a form of self-destruction, using, of course, its elements to simulate the absence of change, even when it is perceived. This leads to constant tension within society, achieving discourses of comfort or sophisticated domination, slowing the production of critical essence, and resulting in an approximate lack of development of individuals.

This development leads precisely to a society that is even more maladaptive in the face of its circumstances, such as illness or other events that deviate from the norm. In other words, it becomes disrupted into a maladaptive one, all in the name of maintaining a normal discourse that omits those elements that cause it to deviate from that format. Without a doubt, we can speak of a possible path toward the expansion of this group.

This fixation on the family as the axis to which one must adhere under all circumstances is, in turn, a desperate measure to maintain the structures that prepare the individual for the structures beyond it, to which we all succumb in some way. Its support for its hegemony, without examining relationships, can lead to the continuation of inappropriate behavior, which is precisely what is not desired. This defense seems unconscious and rather careless toward society, so we can speak of a clearly naive effort. The intention is for everyone to be well; however, the consequences are not produced by these, but by what the action does within the context.

Many people are starting from a defensive position, fearing their own family system, that it is promoting something alien to well-being. It has always been said that the family actually works for this reason; however, we know that the notion responds to the fulfillment of ideals and that it is specific to each group. There is a tendency to protect oneself within it for no other reason than its productiveness of stability, which in turn has shaped one's life's path in pursuit of it. The detachment from the idea of ​​maintaining the family results in a deep disillusionment that concretizes precisely the defensiveness of this notion of well-being within the praxis it represents. Change beyond this is not visualized, given that life was based on that conception; that is, the loss of it would be visualized.

In my case, it was necessary to do so because the well-being provided by my family was becoming detached from the social normality in which I subscribed, acting on those elements that only served as a means of gain, those that served to homogenize the feeling of detachment from others from a victimist behavior and a vision of life based on domination for the sake of survival. What my family was proposing was my isolation from society, consisting of seeking what was indispensable to it and sharing the feeling of marginalization encapsulated in a supremacy. It resulted in a driving force for me to enter into detachment with the idea because I did not want to remain under that condition, nor did the groups that supported it. I wanted a life consisting of consciousness, sustainable sociability, and bringer of calm, and of profitable subsistence, starting from any element that was not carried by my relatives, in order to diminish their tools to make me return to my previous situation thanks to their need to homogenize all individuals, with a view to safeguarding the idea that one is well and not bad for the fact of not being able to be inserted and in tune with the world beyond us.

When I was a teenager, I stumbled upon pornography for the first time, and like many young men, curiosity quickly turned into a routine. At first, it felt like an innocent exploration of sexuality, almost like a rite of passage. But what started as occasional viewing during adolescence somehow became a deeply ingrained habit in my adulthood. Now that I am married, I find myself watching even more than before, despite having a loving and fulfilling relationship with my wife. This contradiction puzzles me 🤔. How is it that I can share intimacy with the person I love most, yet still feel compelled to seek artificial stimulation through a screen? I have read about dopamine reinforcement, novelty-seeking behavior, and the escalation effect in behavioral addictions, and these explanations make sense scientifically. Still, emotionally, it feels like an unresolved battle between rational understanding and impulsive action. Do you ever ask yourself why something so artificial can hold such a powerful grip on our brains?

Over the years, I noticed how pornography consumption gradually shaped my expectations. It was not about love, affection, or connection anymore; it became about intensity, novelty, and the endless pursuit of something new. This mirrors the very mechanism of tolerance seen in substance addiction, where the same stimulus loses its impact over time, pushing one to seek greater extremes. I started to recognize certain patterns: I would use it not only for arousal but also for stress relief, boredom, or even avoidance of difficult emotions. This realization made me feel trapped, as if the habit had infiltrated parts of my life where it did not belong. I confess that the shame cycle is real—after watching, I would feel guilty, promise myself to stop, but then repeat the behavior. And the paradox here is that while I acknowledge the addictive tendencies, I continue to rationalize them because of their accessibility, anonymity, and perceived harmlessness;

Yet, I try to maintain hope 🌱. I have begun to view this struggle not as a moral failure but as an opportunity for self-awareness and growth. I am learning to set boundaries, to replace compulsive behavior with healthier coping mechanisms like exercise, meditation, and open communication with my spouse. I truly believe it is possible to retrain the brain and regain control, just as one would in cognitive behavioral therapy or any structured intervention for maladaptive habits. When I reflect on it, I realize pornography does not define my masculinity, my marriage, or my identity. It is simply a habit that I allowed to grow unchecked, but habits can be reshaped. I share this here not to seek sympathy but to remind myself—and perhaps others—that it is never too late to make a change. Have you ever wondered if what feels like an unbreakable addiction might actually be a doorway toward deeper resilience, discipline, and authenticity in life? If so, maybe we are not as powerless as we sometimes think 💪.

sometimes i ge ttired of my drums and sometiems loops but when its time to get more and i dont have cash, ... i cant even put words to describe. looking for free drumkits are dumb, and yes i know someties they want a little bit of work since its free. that still doesnt explain why they take you through 3 websites just for a little extra revenue, for you still not get the kit either because its a old link or even they just left that part out. anyways, yea i had to type a little note in a website to get the link for it no to work so here: {omg, sheesh! to think i would get a simple free drum kit but NO. whatever, this dumb tom-foolery is a good vent anyways.}

hiya! so basically i've known this person ,we'll call her Lauren I guess, for about three years now. we met during classes one day and we sort of just became friends, she wanted things I had (food, money, drinks etc.) and I wanted friends. so she convinced me to do all these things such as skipping classes, skipping meals, and other things of the like. she would tell me really sad things about herself (that I'm not even sure whether they're true anymore) and then i'd feel obligated to give her stuff, or comfort her. then she would get involved in my love life and things and ruin my relationships. she kept getting me to buy her stuff, and do stuff with her, then she blamed ME when we got caught. and so about four weeks ago, I skipped class and went downtown with her. and then when we went back to school, she was really distant and stuff. and then a friendly acquantance told me she'd went around talking shit about me after she got back. which pissed me off a little. so I messaged her that evening going

me: "heyy lauren! how was your day? yeah someone just told me you talked shit about me?"

her: "well one of my friends just pointed out we dont do good things together"

me: "you mean the things you reccomend?"

her: "well I reccomend we don't be friends anymore"

me: "no I mean you recommend and ask me to do all the things your friends are warning you about."

and so I blocked her and told her to fuck off. then the next day she went around and talked shit about me AGAIN.

and she started coming up to me asking me for shit. then one day i got called into the principals office and they said "do you know of any stealing from the gas station down the street?" so I was confused. and said I didn't know. then after the made me write down I had no idea anyone I knew was stealing. then Lauren said "oh yeah they have footage of me slipping a drink in your bag when you weren't looking. but I just said I was forced to do it." obviously I was very confused and a little pissed. because I wasn't aware she put the drink into my bag. and so then I heard from one of the teachers daughters that Lauren told them I forced her to do It. so I told the principal what Lauren had told me. and she got in a lot of trouble, and in even more trouble from the teacher for lying. so then she wasn't too happy about that, and gathered a group of people (her 'friends') to lie about me. but one of the people she asked to lie about me, told me what she was going to do, so I went and talked to a deputy principal. I told a few of my friends what had happened, and she said to anyone who would listen that I was a manipulative bitch, and started dead naming me, then said me "talking shit" about her was really getting to her. then she came into school the next day with a hangover. and started saying she had 30 shots because she was sad about me. then her friends started "Warning" my friends that IM the bitch who ruins everyone's lives. and then she still has the audacity to come up to me and talk to me.