Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 8

Huuuge vent/dump of thoughts

So it's the 9 of August. Currently 5:30 am. I can't sleep. Yesterday, i was a bit stumped on what do all morning. Then by lunch she was mad at me. Which was fair cause i didn't do the dishes. And she was mad that I 'have fun cooking' and then don't do the dishes. Which she's right on, even though i barely cooked recently and the only dishes i used were the ones we used to eat. Also the times where i do wash them, somehow she just doesn't notice ig? Cause she still says i haven't done in months, like the day after. But idk maybe doesn't count. She's like that with a lot of other stuff, like sweeping the floor for example, which i have done like 6 or 7 times in last few weeks, specifically because She asked and said she wanted to mop the floors. And she still hasn't done though? She's only done it in a very small spot because It was necessary, but then got mad when i skipped a room last time. It's not a big deal but still weird. Anyway today She was mad about me. And usually i just kinda hide untill It passes and today i did the same, i Just kinda hid in the bathroom as long as possible untill i couldn't anymore cause i had to cook and even after that I was staring at my phone and just trying to get through lunch as fast as possible to go back in my room. And i wasn't really looking at her cause i didn't want her to get mad again. And then she was asking for sugar and water and basically she felt bad. Maybe low Sugar/low Blood pressure. She said It was probably bc she eat little sugar. Which yeah. That's why since SHE IS THE ONE CONCIOUSLY CHOOSING TO EAT LOW SUGAR AND TO EAT HALF ASSED MEALS ALL THE TIME cause:

1)She doesn't like cooking and usually puts no effort in It.

2) She's been self concious lately, more than usual, and has been obsessed with dieting and losing weight etc. She's always has been since i was a kid and pushed that stuff since i can remember. ( I was 5/6 when she'd make me watch TV shows about overweight people who were on the verge of dying, and She used to say i'd be like them one day and die young.) But lately It's her new obsession.

Which. All in all. Both points are Fair. Do what you want. Even though, clearly there's a flaw in your judment if you feel this bad. (For referece It's even the first time and i told her multiple times to eat more sugar, i've tried even packing her lunch when she went to work and i to school, but sometimes she "didn't see It". I honestly It woundn't have been as much of a problem for now that we're at home more often, but whatever. That aside. After she felt better she went on about how i didn't even notice and was just staring at my phone (which i was because I Just wanted to leave and feel safe in my bedroom.) and that I need to "wake up". Basically she thinks i'm dumb. Which, sure, she's not off the mark right there. And Just all of that has been on my head all day. And there's just this huge feeling of painfull dread like under my rib cage that i can't shake off. I didn't really do much after that. I made some drawing which i am quite happy with + made dinner. And i've just been really stuck on the fact that i simply can't do this quite right. I should've noticed. And just in general should be Better. Idk what's wrong with me that i can't just be "good". I've tried and i'm trying but i'm just so stupid and i mess It up. Or Maybe i Just can't change the fact that i'm bad and this point less cause i'll always be a bad person. Sometimes i think i'm improving. And i think i am doing good and Better. But i'm not. I'm really not. And It just kinda feels like all my attempts at being better are fake, like three half decent ideas in thrench coat trying to make me pass as a good person when i'm not. And they're doing a terrible job by the way. I'm doing a terrible job. I should be better. Today i should've noticed. I should be preparing for September. Idk studying things I was behind on last year. Learning how to wake up sooner. Or Better yet, not let my grades slip for the past two years. Or not messing up every time i've been trying to be better for the past five years. Any would've been good. Honestly, i'm Just so tired of being bad. Sometimes i wish i wasn't here, so her life could be better and easier and i wouldn't hurt her. Other times i wish i was alone. Like really really alone, Not Just feeling alone. So at least i could be horrible alone and not hurt others and do things badly at my pace.

sometimes i just wanna pack my bags and run far away from this crappy reality. you ever feel trapped in your own life? well, that's me right here, trying to plow through until university starts so i can finally hit the escape button. it's all because of my parents who just can't wrap their heads around me being gay. we're talkin' constant cold shoulders, awkward silences during dinners, and those backhanded comments they think are subtle. i'm seventeen and kinda over the act of pretending in my own home. like, why's it such a big deal? wouldn't life be so much simpler if they just accepted me as i am?

growing up, i'd always prefer to hang out with my friends who have supportive folks. those visits gave me a glimpse into what supportive family dynamics look like. honestly, that's all i want. when my friend alex, who i'm kinda jealous of, talks about his family being proud of him just the way he is, i can't help but wish for the same. my parents think i'm just rebelling or going through a phase. they say “you'll change when you meet the right girl.” sorry folks, won't be a girl. can't they just get that it's not a switch i can flip on or off?

anyway, i'm counting down the days till i head to uni, 'cause it's like a beacon of hope for me. i'll finally get to start fresh, be who i am without caring about playing the part for anyone else's sake. maybe then i'll find my own tribe and perhaps even a boyfriend without the side-eye glances at home. would it be all sunshine and rainbows? probably not. still gotta figure out student loans and handling classes, but it's a step closer to freedom; you know? plus, i'm thinking of joining some lgbtq+ groups to meet people going through the same stuff. life's too short to be stuck in limbo, right? so, here's to making a fresh start!

this summer has sucked tremendously. my partner had just graduated with an associates degree from community college and got transferred to a wonderful bachelors+masters program with a half tuition scholarship. it seemed to be going great.

they needed a car, so we tried carvana. NEVER AGAIN. everything was smooth and painless up until actually getting the damn thing. delays and delays and delays, so we just cancelled. but they said that they couldn't refund A THOUSAND DOLLARS because it was a long-haul shipping fee. we had to dispute the charge and only just now got the all clear that theyre getting their money back.

next: moving out. they dont have a good home life. we've been dating 3 years and their parents still dont know i exist. luckily a few friends have an apartment in the city with a room available, so thats sorted. i cant go in to help them pack or move, so everything had to be moved over the course of weeks until the move in date, which SUCKED.

now for the worst. they signed up for on campus housing earlier in the year, not knowing what their living situation could look like. unbeknownst to us, this is LEGALLY BINDING. now theyre being charged an extra 20k a year for room and board that they won't use.

so we needed to send a release appeal, getting a letter from a third party verifying that they arent in a financial situation to pay for room and board. the bill is due TOMORROW and the appeal is still pending, they wont answer any calls or emails.

fuck it, they thought. tuition NEEDS to be paid for. lets apply for loans.

ALL. FUCKING. DENIED. even with my mom offering to cosign. what the fuck?

so now we're scrambling to find out if we can delay payment until the appeal is finalized, because jesus christ what are we supposed to do?

worst case, the appeal is denied and they simply cant pay for college and needs to drop out.

i dont know where to go from here. this is someone i deeply care for, it has been BRUTAL going through all this. ive been anxious, cant eat, lost weight. the uncertainty of whats next is killing me.

so, if my life was a sitcom, what would you think?

fucking hell

How wrong is it to want to write a book about your family without making it obvious?

Hi all, I just need some support. I spent the last 4 years building my life around the idea that my boyfriend and I would eventually move into our own place. The first year we looked up listings and everything but then it stopped year 2. I brought up other listings around the start of year 3 and he started spending a lot on expensive things :gaming equipment, printer etc. This made me think that oh yeah he doesn't want to get a house together (I live with him still in a rental property) I brought this up and he goes to tell me that we are no longer compatible but doesn't explain why. I wrote him a letter pouring my heart out and he didn't respond to it either, but he's been acting like he's my friend, even made me bacon the other morning and said i could stay as long as i need to. Am i hooding out hope that we can have an open communication relationship? How do I deal with being in love with him and knowing it won't work while staying polite and cordial while living with him still? Ive never lived on my own and so its a scary situation especially since I want to keep him in my life but know its probably for the best.

I hate being self aware. I already know all the answers to my problems, how to improve it, and what is holding me back. All I want is someone who makes me feel safe to share my problems with. However, my country is a place where mental illness is a taboo and a joke. I wish someone would tell me something I don't know about myself lol.

I’m 29, married, and honestly, I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me sometimes. My husband is, by all observable metrics, a good man. He hasn’t given me any concrete reason to question his fidelity since we’ve been together. He texts back promptly, he doesn’t hide his phone, and he makes time for me even when he’s dead tired from work. But despite all of that, I have this insidious, gnawing insecurity that crawls up my spine whenever I see him laughing at something on his phone or when he takes a few minutes too long to reply. Maybe I’m just paranoid—or maybe I’m responding to unresolved trauma masquerading as intuition. I wish I could say I’ve always been this suspicious, but the truth is, I used to be chill as hell in past relationships. It’s like something cracked open in me the day I found out he cheated on his ex-wife.

Now before anyone jumps on the "once a cheater, always a cheater" bandwagon, let me just say: people can change. We’ve all heard the quote, "Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future." That said, how do you trust someone who’s proven capable of deception? Especially when you weren’t the one who got lied to, but you know someone else was. My husband admitted it pretty early in our relationship. He said, "I was a different man back then," like that version of him lived in another body entirely. He didn’t justify it, which I appreciated—he just owned it. And for some dumb reason, maybe arrogance, maybe naïveté, I believed I could be the exception. I thought I was different enough, good enough, smart enough to be the woman he wouldn’t betray. But now, two years into this marriage, that knowledge lingers like an app running in the background, draining my emotional battery even when everything seems fine on the surface.

I catch myself analyzing his tone, his body language, even the most mundane changes in routine. If he skips his morning kiss or seems distracted during dinner, my mind starts constructing hypothetical infidelity timelines with CIA-level detail. It’s exhausting. It’s like being your own private investigator in a case that hasn’t even been opened yet. What’s worse is that I know how unfair it is. He doesn’t deserve to be interrogated every time he has a bad day. I read somewhere that "projection is when you dislike something about yourself and attribute it to someone else"—and maybe that’s what I’m doing. Maybe I’m projecting my fear of not being enough onto him. Maybe I’m scared he’ll do to me what he did to her because deep down, I think I’m just as disposable. Isn’t that pathetic? To measure your self-worth based on someone else’s sins?

And still, I don’t want to be this woman. I don’t want to play emotional detective or police someone I claim to love. I want to trust him, truly trust him, not just say it and hope my voice doesn’t crack. I’ve been seeing a therapist who specializes in relationship anxiety and attachment theory, and she said something that hit me hard: "You’re not reacting to him—you’re reacting to the narrative you’ve built around what he might do." That stopped me cold. Because she’s right. I’m so damn focused on worst-case scenarios that I’m sabotaging the best-case reality. He’s here. He’s loyal—at least from everything I’ve seen. He still reaches for my hand in bed, still brags about me to his friends, still asks for my opinion before making big decisions. How much more evidence do I need before I stop treating him like a ticking time bomb?

So I guess I’m asking: why am I so insecure in my relationship? Is it self-esteem? Is it trauma? Is it just me being a dramatic, controlling idiot? I’m trying to get better. I read books. I journal. I’m taking SSRIs. I’m not passive about this, because if there’s one thing I don’t want, it’s to become the reason this marriage crashes. He’s not perfect—none of us are—but he’s trying, and so am I. There’s this quote from Esther Perel that I remind myself of often: "Trust is built in drops and lost in buckets." I know I need to give him those drops, not with blind faith, but with informed hope. I need to believe that growth is real, and that past behavior, while informative, is not always predictive. I’m learning to accept that the only control I really have in this relationship is over my own reactions and assumptions; and maybe that’s enough to start turning this fear into peace—even if it’s one difficult, imperfect day at a time.

Thanks for reading 😘

I dunno what to do ahahahahaa.. the loml is stalking me. Hahahahah .. it's a bit a grey area it's a good and a bad situation pls help hahahahaha I'm going crazy.

My aunt had a saying when we where little that was a snippit from a church song reworded that went "Jesus said love everyone treat them kindly too, if your heart is filled with poo, no one will live you". To be honest why is it that my family acts like thats a foreign concept, and we aren't even foreign where a freaking white medium Christian family. Its like no one knows how to be kind and no one knows what being a decent human being is like.

On another note I kinda feel like a hyprocrite for wishing for everyone to be different, because i'm the one who cant pick up on social cues and always says the wrong thing. And at this point in my life I feel like saying I have mildish high functioning autism sounds like a stupid excuse.

I have a bunch of sister, mostly older and a twin as well (non identical) and they make me want to kill myself and i'm not saying that in a joking way. Like how is it that every friend I make leaves me for my extroverted sister? It's not like i did anything wrong i really tried to stay their friends but after they meet alice they act like im boring. Some of my other sister seem to always put in the effort to make it seem like i'm trying to be weird and mentally ill but I wish I wasn't, because its not like im even a cool level of mentally ill, im the type that gets called slurs and doesn't make friends unless its to people who don't have there own friends. Even then they always then meet each other through me and kind of forget about me.

Lastly what i'm going to vent about is relationship stuff. So I have a girlfriend and she's nice and I think I like her? I don't really know what it's supposed to feel like. I felt like a bad partner for dating her not even telling her i'm genderfluid when she's a lesbian, but weirdly when i told her she didn't even act like she supported me more like it didn't matter. We are both very adhd and it's long distance anyways (just across town because we go to different high schools and we both don't have cars) so we don.t get to talk a lot so i feel like i'm not there for her anyways. Just in all I haven't figured myself out yet when it comes to romantic relationships, I might be on some spectrum of ace. But I'm just so done with people I just might be mixing up my feelings or something? I don't know. Oki thats it :))

This is somewhat a continuation of my previous story.

Recently I came across some of the reels James has liked, and frankly I am worried because if I’m getting recommended these reels, there is a chance Jess (his girlfriend) is getting recommended them too.

The reason I’m worried because the reels he has been liking makes Jess look bad. From what I know this is James’ first real and serious relationship. He has had been in an extremely short relationship with another girl but it didn’t even last a week. So when he is liking these reels, I am almost positive that it is in relation to Jess.

For context, Jess absolutely loves watching this drama/romance reality TV show (kind of like a guilty pleasure), and James thinks the TV show is dumb.

The reels he has been liking are criticizing women who watch that show: saying things like the show promotes promiscuity, women who watch that show have no loyalty. I was so shocked seeing him liking these reels because I know how much Jess loves watching that show, so for her boyfriend to be liking these reels seems so… off?

What really made me want to post this story is a different reel though. It was a reel that said something along the lines of: ‘Seeing your girlfriend defend another man to you is one of the most embarrassing things a lot of men experience.’

I am just confused how he can like reels like those without thinking how it makes his own girlfriend look. His friends are on IG, other family members (on both sides) are on IG, etc. I think this is such a bad look for her AND him, but maybe I’m just old school? Maybe this is how couples operate in this newer generation? But this still seems so off to me… am I seeing this wrong? I would like to know how other people perceive this.

Everyone is so mean to me, like really mean!!!! I do not even understand what the hell is going on anymore?? I'm 19 and I go to uni like everyone else, I’m studying communications and marketing which is supposed to be all about people and connection and empathy and whatever, but none of these girls in my program act like they’ve even seen a human being before!!! They literally look at me like I’m dirt on their shoes, and I swear it’s just cause I’m hot. I look older than them, maybe mid-20s or something, I’ve been told that a million times at parties or events, and somehow that’s enough for these girls to start whispering and side-eyeing me??? I walk into a seminar room and it's dead silence. Dead. Like did I say something to them??? No. Never. I'm polite, I say hi, I try to make convo, but no. They just act cold as ice like I'm some alien with a disease. It's so pathetic honestly.

And yes, I have an OnlyFans, so what???? What’s the issue???? I make real money. Like more than enough to cover rent, tuition, food, and still have nice things. My content is nothing extreme, nothing illegal, nothing wild — it’s art, okay?? High-quality photography, consistent brand aesthetic, SEO optimization, smart pricing tiers, premium subscriber rewards — it’s literally textbook content marketing but with my face and body, so of course it works. But these girls act like I committed murder!!! I heard one of them saying "at least I’m not selling myself online" like?? Babe, I’m not selling myself. I’m selling a lifestyle, a vibe, a curated digital persona that pays for my goddamn bills while you’re still begging your dad to Venmo you 20 bucks for takeout. Grow up. Stop acting like I’m some kind of danger to the institution of higher education or whatever. You're just bitter.

It’s been like this since the second week of semester. First week they were fake-nice, you know? Those little “omg we should study together!” type lies. Then they all slowly ghosted me. I had one girl literally leave a group project and switch teams just cause she “didn’t feel comfortable.” Like be real, what part of me is uncomfortable??? Is it the fact I have better makeup? Is it cause I know how to dress well for my body type and don’t show up in wrinkled leggings and knock-off Crocs?? Or is it cause guys on campus actually talk to me, and it bothers you that I don’t even chase them? They come to me. They ask ME for notes. They offer ME rides. Maybe focus on why you hate yourself so much that you think someone else’s success is a personal attack. Like what even is the psychology behind that????

But whatever. I’m not gonna lie and say it doesn’t hurt — it really freaking does. I go home some days and just cry, cause it’s lonely out here when you’re actually doing well for yourself and no one claps for you. Like damn, I’m 19, I’m running a profitable content platform with solid monthly growth, I ace my presentations, and I still get treated like trash by basic girls who can't even spell "algorithm." 😤 But I’m not gonna stop. No way. I love how I look, I love making money, and I love the future I’m building. If you hate me for that, that says way more about you than it ever will about me. Maybe one day they’ll grow up and realize the world isn’t high school anymore. Until then, I’ll be doing me — and maybe that’s enough. Or maybe not???

So I met this Muslim girl online we were the same age practically and split by a month(13f) and 14f),

So she’s Muslim and I’m Christian (both girls). So we were talking for a while.. started to get closer and yk.. saying we loved each other and pet names. And honestly I loved her and I still do..?

Turns out she has a bf. But what we were doing wasn’t really dating? Dating without the label. So we acted like a couple and wanted to be one but we couldn’t. She was Muslim and a girl. And I was Christian and a girl. It was a SIN. So we just kept it “casual” even though we’ve been intim*te before. So after she told me she had a bf i obviously got jealous over time? She was my friend. I knew her better than him. I knew when she was unhappy, happy, depressed, bored, sad, angry, etc. and she chose to keep us both. So I was getting annoyed, I’m not your girlfriend but we act like it? That doesn’t make sense. But this damned religion is keeping her away from me.

So after a couple weeks she soon was acting different? She has a new boyfriend and still with me. She’s acting… weirder? Like s*xual and inappropriate, but with another person(not me or her bf) so obviously I’m annoyed??? So I start slowly cutting her off and hinting to her I don’t like this. So she listens and stops for a bit before randomly spiraling. This isn’t the first time this has happened. She’s thr*atening me to k*ll herself? So first of all. I’m freaked out and panicking to help her and convince her not to and she’s having flipped emotions. ||||||| after i calmed her down she soon starts flirting with me so i tell her to stop or she’ll regret it later(religion.)

So later on she starts acting s*xual to other people again so this time i cut her off. Because I’ve told her not to CLEARLY and it’s making me jealous. And honestly it was emotionally exhausting, but I still really liked her?

So it really ended suddenly and I hope she’s okay? But I’d honestly talk to her again. And I ended up friends with her boyfriend lol!! (ONLY FRIENDS.) and he’s nice! He’s got a new girlfriend with my other friend!! (It’s a whole gc with 10 ppl)

How do you cope with a hard week? I'm fine but I'm kinda worry because my pet's not ok, she's going to the vet this friday and I'm feeling a little bit sad for it. She's been dealing with some issues with her health state for a while but it's not that serious... I hope she'll be fine after all... But still sometimes the doubt and worries remain...

There's a girl at work I like, but she's not my cup of tea. I sense she's interested in something beyond that, but I'm not. I sense she's somewhat delusional and capable of bursting into tears if her dream isn't fulfilled to the letter, if even the slightest change occurs. I don't want her to be the one directing the relationship, because otherwise, I'll be at the mercy of her dominance, with serious work-related repercussions resulting from the disappointment if I give in. If I were to propose to continue a relationship with her on an ongoing basis, it would be like holding her in that dream, no matter what, taking advantage of it, since she gains power over me: being however she wants in exchange, of course, for not breaking that dream.

I don't see a girl with prodigious mental health as a prerequisite, since her desire is to succumb to disappointment. Without the emotional management that subsequently impacts social situations to maintain relief, there's no possibility of a deep relationship, whether romantic or even dating. I continue to be amazed at how people give up on the illusion of being liked by another person and don't first examine the person they're dealing with. This leads me to a modus operandi that doesn't take responsibility for visualizing where the next step, which they sense they're going to take blindly, given their impulses, will lead.

In these circumstances, my dear friends, I understand the need to take risks, but there's also the need to observe, at least as far as you can see, which in itself is important for making decisions. There are undoubtedly times when the challenge will be worthwhile, but that's only if, based on our vision, we don't see anything that threatens our stability. The point is whether it's just right. Indeed, we can talk about difficulties; however, these seem valid to me when they enter into an axis that results in enrichment, which they all are. However, there are times when they arise and they correspond only to the need to distance oneself, since in our modus operandi there is no such enrichment, but rather an abandonment.

It's painful for me to feel that I cannot succumb with complete peace of mind to this woman because I am also eager for a relationship, even though I adore my solitude. My solitude stems precisely from accepting that I am capable of developing alone rather than in a group, because I haven't found a group that casts doubt on this idea, but rather reinforces it. Which makes me think that perhaps I only visualize those who make me feel that it's better to be alone, referring, of course, to my past, where being under a hegemony and consecrated as a family for my family, I saw solitude as a path to development.

Nowadays, I find it difficult to think of a group that supports my development, although I can't say that being alone isn't the first step toward such an issue. It's first about seeing where we're coming from, a question that speaks to our environment and, at the same time, a distancing from it, and then moving toward where we feel framed in terms of such an exercise in development. We can say they are stages. The relationships I've had before have been more of a way out of such a hegemonic family situation, given the excitement it holds for me. But the very effect of this very situation undermined me. Ultimately, in a hegemonic system, its origin lies in a heightened illusion about oneself, specifically in behavior.

I wish the circumstances with this girl were different, as in other cases, but it must be said that her usefulness to my well-being wasn't in deepening the relationship for a shared destiny, but rather to point out that I wasn't yet ready to leave such an environment, because, in principle, there isn't the distancing that would make it so. Physical distance in this sense was, like courtship, also a very attractive and widely accepted call. However, stability would depend on maintaining the hope with which I would be received. In itself, there was no escape. Furthermore, other interested individuals of different kinds would not be able to contemplate me because, in principle, I would not be able to contemplate them, and neither would they in me because I harbor fear of the environment in the midst of getaways, which implies the production of inconveniences to their stability. By nature, we all seek that which does not provide them, although sometimes this is in such demand that it is very expensive, as can be a blur, as are courtships and physical distances that were sometimes recommended to me, as I was told.

It's clear that family situations can't be resolved with easy solutions, because such complexity permeates the modus operandi and makes such an easy solution a path to another hell, but one that's more comforting thanks to the cessation in the face of deep disappointment, and on top of that, with us there defending that, because we have the feeling, although projected, that the idea of a better place is a lie. Nor can we turn back, because those who have welcomed us feel their support for us after such a situation has been in constant decline inside.

Since this is a place specifically designed for venting, I feel a bit more comfortable speaking here. I am a 21 year old girl who's in college right now, trying to figure out life and such. I am away from home for college and I miss my city so much. I am going towards a career that does not pay that well. I am not even that interested in it...just that I know it's something I can do. I have a few friends in this city who are nice people but none of them vent so I can't burden them with my story. Besides, their lives are much more interesting than mine. One has a friend she speaks to on a daily basis, two others have boyfriends and a lot of other friends with whom they can always have a conversation. My friends in this city have many other friends to talk to but all I have are them. If I tell them this, I am pretty sure I would be treated much differently but it won't be better, it would just be with more caution. I don't like that, I don't want anyone to be uncomfortable around me. The friend who I used to vent to is now busy all the time and she makes a lot of decisions in her life that only messes things up as she's enjoying the risks. She tells me I can speak to her about everything and it used to be that way but now that she's busy, most of my long messages get lost in the void of things she's into. I tell her that we can speak about my issues later because she has worse things going on for her. But deep down, I really do wish she would one day just listen to me and tell me what I need to hear. She always knew what to say...but nowadays she's looking to speak to me about her problems and I can't deny that because I know she would give me a listen if she was available too. My ex who I'm friends with and not completely over, he's busy too and when I vent I just don't get much...sometimes when I break down, he does help me but I don't want my brain to hold on till I let it out. I am going through a lot and I don't want to keep it in like that. And I often lash out at him for not listening to me. I should stop doing that... because of the relationship I had with him, I keep thinking he should be listening to me. But no one is entitled to that, especially since he's also very busy (and often gets sick) and he shouldn't be coming back from work all tired just to hear me vent. I feel like everyone's got someone but I've got no one.

I want to try getting closer to my friends in the city but since they already have friends they talk to, they don't need me for it. So it's very one-sided and unfair. I don't want to be in this situation.