Dating Stories - page 2

[Translated from Spanish. Reminder: IIWIARS is English only]

I’ve always been very insecure and jealous in my relationship, somehow he made me feel that way, even though he never did anything wrong. I have his Instagram logged into my phone and I was always checking what he was doing. Until I decided to check his TikTok video history. I found a series of videos of a beautiful woman. I said the girl’s name to him and asked who she was, he said he didn’t know her, and I kept insisting, saying I knew he’d watched her. He said he thought she was pretty. Now I feel insufficient, stupid, ugly, trashy, and everything bad there is. I don’t have the courage to break up, and I’ve already cried a lot and he comforted me, apologized, and all that. What do you think I should do? But he always knew I felt insecure because I always opened up to him, but I know there wasn’t much to do, because he never gave me a reason to feel insecure or suspicious. It’s very hard to break up because a big part of the time I’m with him, I’m happy.

So me and this girl have been talking on and off for about a year, to be specific within this year the reasons we've ended things we're she was over stressed by school, she didn't want to ask me to change and she felt like we were to different and I mean it's my fault for having my standards so low to even take her back because every time we ended things it's because she wanted to but about two and a half months ago she wanted to start talking again but just as friends, which is totally fine but what I was aware of is the fact she would be talking with other guys while talking with me. The way I found out is bc we work together and that's how we met and so we were on shift together just having fun laughing and then one of my friends walk in and I walk up to him calling him by his name bc this is one of my closest friends and like after our shift together she requests to follow him on Instagram and my friend texts me and he's like "do u know who this is" and I'm like "oh that's the girl I'm talking with, she prob heard me call u by your name while at work" and yk I fully trusted this girl so I thought she just followed him bc he was my friend and no other reason but then I started telling her about it and when I told her about the part of me saying that's the girl I'm talking with she blows up in my face and is like "what right do you have to put labels on us, I followed him because she caught my eye and you have no right to interfere" but like I was under the impression that we were fully just trying to work things out between us and it's not like we've just been friends per say I mean litterally the day before she was talking about how jacked I am, and the day before how cute I am and then the day before saying she was shaking because I almost saw her without makeup and then like a week before that saying she was concerned that it seemed like I didn't like her anymore

and like what am I meant to do? I liked this girl so much but I can't just take that laying down right? and I mean I haven't talked to her since but I have to see her at work on Sunday

I just need some advice on the whole situation, maybe I'm being over dramatic and I'm wrong but I feel like I'm being an idiot.

There's a guy I have met in dating app with him I wanna have romantic feelings with him but he has friendly feelings n said he wants to friends and slowly develop into something but idk how long will it take. He said his past was not good because of hurry relationship n stuff.

When he was online in app I was really jealous but he told it was because he saw old friend n chatted in his hometown.

Then he compared his friend with me I was devastated.

I told him i will move on clearly but in reality idk what to do.

Heyah👋🏻😄!!

I'm a short girly, and I was wondering if being short is a good thing when choosing a person to date🤔? I'm also 24, and I worry that my 4 foot 11 inch tall frame might make dudes think of me as a child🫠? I get the "you're super cute" instead of "you're super pretty/s*xy" sorta thing.

Also, because I'm super short my body proportions might seem a bit odd, as I have a size H bust... And that has confused a few of my male and female friends, cause I look like one of those anime characters who's child-like but has an "unrealistic" chest size🥴. They're real by the way, and I've always wanted size C or D, but..... Money😭💸!!

So, I'm asking the public... Anonymously, if my short stature, and front watermelons would turn people off🫠?

It’s kind of stupid. I don’t even really know how to say it, or why I feel the need to throw it out here. But here I am.

Today’s my ex’s birthday.
We broke up over two years ago. We were together for four. And still, every damn year, May 16th hits me like a total bitch.

I try to carry on like it’s a normal day, but it’s not. It never is. I close my eyes and she’s *right there*. The memories come rushing back before I can stop them. Not really the good ones, even though there were a few, but mostly the bad. The heavy. The ones that never really let go.

It was the worst relationship of my life. I’m really not exaggerating it. I’m won’t get into the details—this isn’t the place, and honestly, I don’t want to go back there more than I already am. But it was toxic. Emotionally violent. Draining in ways I still don’t have words for.
And yet—part of me is *still* stuck there. Still trapped in a past I hate with every part of me.

I’ve tried to move forward. Tried to rebuild. And on the outside, it looks like I have. I’m stronger now. Sharper. She’s been gone from my life for ages; we don’t talk, we don’t see each other, we live in different worlds.
But today, I can’t fake it. I can’t pretend May 16th doesn’t mean something. That it doesn’t *still* mess me up.

I hate feeling this way. This ugly, twisted mix of pain, nostalgia, and quiet anger I don’t know where to put. It makes no sense. I didn’t ask for it. I don’t want it. I don’t *deserve* it.
But it’s here. So I’m saying it. Because maybe it’ll helps.
Maybe dragging this invisible weight into the light makes it just a little easier to carry.

sometimes, I find myself perplexed by my attraction to men. at 29, one would assume that I have gathered sufficient wisdom to navigate the dating landscape, yet here I am, grappling with a recurring frustration. my experiences with men have ranged from enriching to utterly disheartening. it's as if they oscillate between interesting conversations and exasperating behavior that leaves me questioning my choices. is it merely a matter of societal conditioning? or is there something inherently captivating about the male psyche that draws me in despite the red flags? 🤷‍♀️

more than once, I have encountered individuals who showcase traits that are both appealing and maddening. for instance, I appreciate a good sense of humor and intelligence, yet these attributes often seem to coexist with a lack of emotional maturity. it is frustrating to witness men flaunt their charm, only to retreat into a shell when the conversation turns serious. I wonder if this is a common experience or if I have a knack for attracting the emotionally unavailable. could others share their encounters? it leaves me pondering why I persist in seeking connections that feel so inconsistently rewarding. the highs are exhilarating, but they inevitably lead to lows that feel all too familiar. 😕

while I understand that every individual is unique, the patterns I observe are hard to ignore. the initial thrill of a promising date quickly dissipates into moments of uncertainty; am I asking too much? do they even realize the impact of their actions? trying to navigate this dating scene feels like an uphill battle that I am somewhat reluctant to fight, yet I continue to feel drawn to it. perhaps, I question my own motivations—what is it about men that keeps me returning for more? the search for companionship is universal, but the road to finding it feels uniquely fraught for me. maybe it's time for reflection and a deeper understanding of what I am truly seeking in this complex game of love. 💔

Is it messed up that I slightly hope the the girl I’ve been talking to goes to jail so I can stop talking to her because I’m struggling to not to talk to her because I’m so alone, and I know she uses and manipulates me and it’s destroyed me emotionally. She goes to court tomorrow and idk how to feel happy because I can not be used or sad because I’ll be back to completely isolated . For a bit more context I met this girl at a club she right off the bat tells me she’s a felon but she likes me, I get her number and we go on a few what I think are dates but really just me paying for her dinner and I get to join along And she gives me just enough to keep me around and hooked but not enough for anything else and she tried to avoid most all conversation I try to have about anything and then calls me a creep to my face for trying to get to know her even though she has never asked me one question about myself and she’s never sales I don’t think this will work or I’m not interested she has said she is interested but doesn’t act like it

Me (14F) and my bf (13M) have been together for a little over a year now, but things have been not so good. We are long distance so we can only text and call, we wanted to meet up when we were older but things have changed. Last night me and him talked about taking a break or breaking up. He has been mean to me for the past few months and didn’t really treat me like his girlfriend, he let his friends be mean to me and he just laughed even though I’ve cried to him on the phone several times because of it.

But we both said if we do breakup, it would be on good terms and we would still talk and be friends. I do love him but the relationship wasn’t healthy for really either of us and often hurt me mentally. I still love him, I really do. I loved how sweet he was when he was and I just love everything about him other than the way he treated me. I feel like the distance is a big part of it because touch is my love language and also an easy way for me to show emotion in a few ways. I don’t want to breakup but it’s for the best.

My only issue is that I don’t know how I would find a new boyfriend when I’m ready. I’m homeschooled, there’s no clubs in my areas that I’m interested in, I don’t wanna do long distance again, moth of the guys/people is my area are assholes…I might have to try an app to meet someone but I’m scared of apps because of the risk of pedophiles and such. I just don’t know what to do

I'm struggling through a break up. It was a three year a relationship with someone I thought I was going to marry and have a future with. We decided to remain friends because we still love and want each other in our lives, even if it means transitioning into a friendship. We are currently going through a period of no-contact to give ourselves a grace period before we try to make a friendship work. It's been hard. Although I love the freedom and flexibility I now have, thinking about them moving on and trying to move on myself hasn't been easy. I've been struggling physically and mentally. It's been affecting my work, not by much, but I do see myself making mistakes and slowing down drastically in terms of work ethic. I know this is for the better, but I still get moments of wishing I could go back and crying over this. It doesn't help that they make it look like they're having an easier time transitioning through this. I know that's such a selfish assumption and people grieve differently but I guess there's a part of me that feels like I'm the only one struggling. I don't know what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to get back on my feet at work and pushing through with enrollments for my master's degree. I'm scared I won't find love anymore after this, and honestly I don't know if I can do anything better than what I had with them. I'm just not doing so great. Unlike my other breakups though, this one has no hatred or anger involved, it's just the yearning and mourning over something I was building my life for. I don't know how to go on... I mean, I'm trying my best but I don't know...

Context: I was with my ex-boyfriend for a little over 2 years. It was definitely rocky, especially toward the end, but the break up hurt. It hurt so bad because it was abrupt, and it was like right when I started liking him again. I became the desperate ex for like a little just trying to get back with him or at the least stay friends. It didnt work after he asked me for advice on how to date a new girl like 3 days. I blew up on him for being an asshole and he blocked me.

Fast forward about 3 months later and I started dating again. I accidently got into a serious relationship while in retrospect, defintelly still having feelings for my ex. I declined my feelings and moved forward with the new guy. Fast forward to this past summer and I cannot stop thinking about my ex. I wasnt happy in my current relationship so I didnt care to hide it. I told my current bf and said I need to reach out to him. He allowed it and things did not go well with my ex. I end up blocking him. Fast forward about 6 months and again he consumes my mind. I dont reach out as I know theres no point but I still want to.

I want so badly to be as connected as we were. He was funny, playful, cocky, but most of all real (or atleast it felt like it). Ive come to understand that I dont like him, but l miss the way I felt.

Today, I feel so empty. My current boyfriend just makes me anxious and judged. I dont love him but I want to because he is a good guy.

Yesterday I asked him, if I dissapeared, do you think I've made an impact on you. He said no. Hes told me he doesnt think I'm funny, he doesnt think Im smart, he just does not like me.

I want so badly to leave him. With college coming up, I told him I want to break up and he said no. I tried to pushback but it was still no. With me being such a coward I took his answer. I should stand on my ground but I dont.

Ive put myself in this situation and I just want advice.

I feel like I havent explained my situation the best I could and definitely left some things out. But, how do I get the ex off my mind. How do I salvage or break off this relationship.

I was so young at the time we dated I was only 12 when we dated. He was 16 at the time and God it was awful..looking back into that I was in a awful relationship. I'm now 16 and I regret everything I was ruined like I became so obsessive and it hurt me so bad I tried to harm myself. he was nice sometimes but he was my first love and I thought it was so real even if it was online. I dated him for maybe until I was 13 and through those years he tried to commit in front of me on call and even stabbed his side of his waist and made me watch him bleed until he finally went to the hospital. he told me it was okay to do things on camera and to make myself bleed and sick. he cheated on me and would buy me things and make me feel so hurt inside. once my parents found out and made me leave all socials and stop talking but of course I found my way back to him when I was 14 and dated him until I was 15 and a half but it was too late. it was weird that day I spoke to him he was all happy and was saying all different things than what he normally said, he lived close to me state wise so he also mentioned he was finally going to let go and see me if I followed his footsteps and I was so confused. that same week I was shattered because it was just all over at the age of 15 I was getting calls from his family saying he was dead and a call from the police apologizing. I was completely ruined and heartbroken but now that I look back on it I shouldve never gotten with him over and over but I was young.

(DISCLAMER I DONT MAKE SENSE BUT I AM JUST RAMBALING)

I’m 23f and I’ve never had any sexual or romantic experience (no holding hands or talking stage). It just never happened for me. Most of my life I didn’t really care or pay attention to it, but it’s like I “woke up” about two or three years ago and looked around and realised I’m so behind everyone else my age. Since then I’ve been trying and failing to do something about it and it’s been affecting my mental health really badly. I can be pretty socially anxious but I’ve been trying to work on that. I’ve been trying to go out more and meet new people, but every time I’ve approached a guy I’ve been rejected. I know that happens and maybe I’ve just had bad luck, but it really messed with my self-esteem as well. I’m not particularly attractive but I try to work with what I have. All that affected my mental health really badly and turned my inexperience into a massive insecurity, making me embarrassed and feel that it’s “too late” now. I see it as a proof that no one found me desirable before. It’s gotten so bad I’m even avoiding my friends now because I feel like I’m so much worse than them. Now I’m worried that even if I do find someone I could get along with, he’s going to be weirded out and turn me down because of it.

Him: For a moment, I thought maybe you’re one of those girls too. (because he heard of teenage pregnancy is increasing)

Who knows, maybe you have some boyfriend…

And you have s*x with him.

Him: Anyway baby, you’re really not doing such things, right?

She: ARE YOU CRAZY??? YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND?

Him: Most girls have already done it.

It’s the same in every country—

Not just India.

She: What do you mean “doing it”?!

Him: I didn’t say that, honey…

She: Oh, you didn’t say it? But I’m saying it.

That thought was yours.

You think I’m a w**re?

I’m a bi***?

She: Hey, I’m not from (adcabc) you know that.

Him: (abcabc) is number 1 in this.

She: Are you mad? I’m from the East side!

And wtf you are thinking about my character?

Him: I didn’t say that, honey…

She: Oh, you didn’t say it? But I’m saying it.

That thought was yours.

You think I’m a whore?

I’m a bitch?

Him: Baby…

She: How can you even think that?

Him: I’m just saying what I thought for a second.

She: You are the dumbest fucking asshole I’ve ever met.

Him: Baby…

I was just talking about that moment, and I know now…

Baby…

Him: Baby…

I was just talking about that moment, and I realize now…

Baby, I love you. Really.

Let’s just drop all this… baby.

Her: This conversation has become completely inappropriate and uncomfortable.

Him: For you maybe, baby.

Not for me.

Her: You repeatedly made personal and offensive comments that are disrespectful and suspicious. I’m fucking ashamed that you even thought that.

Him: Because I love you.

And no matter what you say, it doesn’t hurt me.

I love you more than you love me.

More than anyone else.

I don’t care what you say, I only care that you’re saying something, and I love it.

What happened?

You should try to understand me.

Not just sit on one thing I said and fight over it.

That’s not it.

I’m not perfect.

Her: So now you’ll question my character? Hahahaha.

Him: But everything you do affects me so much.

I always remember those moments…

That someone once did that for me too.

Baby, I said it’s not suspicion.

Her: Then what would you call the things you said?

Him: To be honest, (something garbage)…

Her: At least spell my name right.

Him: You have the dumbest boyfriend.

I’ll stay single from now on, I’ll never get into a relationship again,

because I’m not worthy of it.

And honestly, I had already lost interest in girls.

I need to accept reality.

Her: Just tell someone—tell your mom or sister—that you said those things to your girlfriend.

You’ll never understand what it means to say such things to a girl, and how deeply it affects her.

Accept it.

Childish.

Him: Okay baby…

You’re right.

I understand now.

Because I’ve already said it.

I just couldn’t remember that moment before, but now ....

I’m sorry.

I love you.

I love you so much.

(After she calm down a little)

Her: Men are shit. I'm done with them.

I might die before I fall for anyone ever again.

Him: It’s okay, (girl name). Then let’s end it now?

(??)

Her: Sounds so eager.

Him: See you next time.

Her: You want to be free? Then go ahead.

Him: Haha.

Her: I've erased you from here (the chat), wish I could erase you from my mind too.

Him: I wish.

I hope you come out of all this soon.

Her: No clarity, no respect… why the fuck do I still love you?

Him: Yeah, (girl name).

For a girl, these things matter the most?

Her: Just go away from here.

Him: Okay then.

(She really loved him and after thinking for a while)

she:

I know you’ve been through a lot, and I wanted to be there for you to make things better. But right now, I need to step back for my own peace. I can’t ignore the hurt I’m feeling anymore. I truly hope you find the happiness and healing you need, but I also need to heal. Please understand that I’m doing this for myself.

Him:

Selfish.

I don't care about myself.

You know, I could die for you.

I love you more than anyone, even more than my own family.

But I also want this.

Selfish.

You know how much I love you.

But you don’t even try to understand.

You only care about yourself.

Her:

Playing the victim, aren’t you?

Him:

Leave it.

I can’t say anything now.

I think we should stay apart.

Just take care.

Her:

As you wish.

Him:

Honey, I love you.

But I’m not the right one for you.

I come from a poor family.

I’m not even handsome.

Her:

I don’t care.

But honestly, it feels like you’ve become mentally unstable.

I always thought you were handsome, good-looking, and a good person.

But what the hell is going on with your thinking?

Him:

I’m a small-minded person… just thinking like them.

Her:

Whatever.

Her: I’m done with this conversation. Take care.

so I don't know what category to put it in or how to say this but its not a vent, I'm just confused and loss of words.

soo there's this guy (B) he's my bsf (N) brother. we dated before but I broke up with him months ago. now we are in a "talking"/"dating thing" idk its in between. anyhow we got each others number and we have been talking ALOT. yesterday afternoon we were talking and he asked me if I wanted to see a video he's been "making"/"made already" (yt video) I said sure and he sent a link to yt (I assumed it was anyway) but when I clicked on it...well... uhh.. it sent me to a p*_rn hub and I clicked out of it so fast and got traumatized. a minute later I thought maybe my phone was on something but no (I clicked on it diff times to see if I wasn't crazy but uhhh nawh it sent me to multiple different p*_rn hubs) I told him it wasn't a video to yt (acting chill abt it) but he said "oh" "did you watch it?" I said no, not to be weird. he eventually sent the right thing but I don't know what to do (its the next day) so do i confront him about it or just delete our convo and never speak to each other again?

SOS

I feel sad today. I miss my ex and everyone, also sad about not being able to play my genshin on a decent device! and remembered, oh I'm on the last day of my period. Don't mess with me hormones lmao