Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 40

I fucking hate my life, myself, the people in my life (besides one), the people not in my life anymore.

I feel so bad; this depression is killing me.

It already fucking killed me from the inside.

I feel rotten from the inside,

like i have this parasite in me that just kills my sense of time,

my ability to feel anything.

I just wanna feel. Feel happy, cared for.

I don’t wanna hurt, or be hurt.

I don’t wanna be wronged, left.

I don’t wanna be rotten,

scared of people seeing through the lies and driven away from me.

I hope i just dont wake up tomorrow,

no one text me,

so how will they know if i am alive or not?

They dont care if there is blood running through my veins,

oxygen through my blood,

if my heart is pounding.

No one fucking care in the end.

And the end? I’ve fucking reached it.

Im so done. I feel depressed,

so i reach out to people in the hope for just.. love, comfort, non-judgement.

And what do i get? ‘Space to heal’.

That you can’t heal the soul you didn’t break, doesn’t mean you can just fucking leave?

I literally told you i wasn’t your responsibility, and you take it as a yes for just ghosting me?

I never asked you to fix me,

i just long to be held. You abandoning me,

in the time i need you the most,

cuts deeper than the blade i use to just fucking feel something.

If, in the darkest time in the night,

my body just aches to hurt, bleed, harm.

Am i just supposed to give in?

Does it make you feel better that i have a possibility of bleeding out,

just because u can’t handle, change me?

That i feel unable to open up to you?

That i spend my time writing this?

Because only my fucking notes app listenings?that you are the reason i shed a tear?

Are unable to sleep?

Get bad grades from stress?

Look, i don’t blame you for my pain,

i blame you for ignoring it.

Do you feel better, now you left?

Because i ‘only text you to vent’?

Maybe i do,

BECAUSE YOU NEVER.FUCKING.TEXT.ME.

Do you want me to fucking beg you for a text? Is it that hard,

to just stick around when i need you?

I don’t want your pity, help, advice.

I know i shouldn’t cut myself,

i am aware that food is a live essential.

Do you think I’m that fucking stupid?

Do you see me as retarded?

You fucking do, don’t you?

Well i can’t ask you,

BECAUSE YOU WON’T FUCKING RESPONSE. Didn’t you say you care? Love me? Is this love? Leaving in hard times? Were it all just lies?

I really believed you.

When i told you i love you,

I did with every inch of me.

Why does everyone in the end leave?

Am i that fucking unlovable?

Or did they just got scared away,

by my rotten inside?

Oh well, can’t blame them.

And now you wonder why i don’t talk to you?

If i end up dead,

you’re one of my fucking 13 reasons,

and i hope it haunts you for eternity.

I hope your fucking soul is still lost,

wandering in the dark depths or the universe if you lay in your grave as your corpse rots away in the ground.

Actually, no, i don’t. I still love you.

I still care about you, how your day was,

how you slept, what’s going on in your head, your silence battles.

Even when i am drowning and youre just complaining about too much CO2 in your unlimited oxygen,

i’d still give you some of my air.

See..! It’s.not.that.fucking.hard.

What do you need to just understand it?

Do i need to buy you glasses?

Or will my suicide note be the thing you finally read, and don’t ghost?

Fuck, i am such a fool, ain’t i?

Hey folks, so I'm 29, female, and I've got this habit of overthinking that seems to always hit the pause button on my relationships. Seriously, it's like my brain goes into overdrive the minute I'm in something good. Why can't I just chill for once? It's like I replay every word, every gesture, digging for meaning when there's often nothing more to it. You ever do that thing where you read a text, and then read it again, and again, analyzing punctuation and tone like it's some hidden code? That's me, your local overthinking expert. And it’s not just texts; throw in conversations, plans, even that awkward silence between words, and there I go spinning stories that don't exist. One moment, I'm basking in butterflies, and the next, I'm spiraling into a mental maze where no one ever wins. My therapist told me to keep things in the moment, to just breathe and see things for what they are, not what my brain decides to twist them into. Anyone else feel their overthinking is the boss of their emotions? Like, who gave it the rulebook? It's ironic; I crave the normalcy of a peaceful relationship, yet my mind insists on creating hurdles that aren’t even there. A friend once told me, "Overthinking is the art of creating problems that weren't even there." True, right? Once upon a relationship, I took forever to reply to a simple "Hey, how's your day?" because I was dissecting the subtext, ending up leaving the poor guy waiting; how do you even explain that without sounding completely bonkers? So here’s my question for the day: How do you stop? How do you teach your mind to quiet down and simply let things flow? I've tried distraction techniques, you know, keep myself busy, but it’s usually at those quiet night times that the loudest thoughts come out. I’m trying to remember what my yoga teacher said; something about "acknowledging your thoughts without judgment." It's just tough when you're your harshest critic. The whole "keep calm and carry on" motto sounds so easy until you're knee-deep in your own anxieties. Life's weird, right? Sometimes it's exciting, full of chances, only for that little voice in your head to keep saying, "But what if..." What if I'm not good enough? What if I'm bothering him? Honestly, the unknown has always been my greatest motivator to overthink. Social media doesn't help either. You see bits and pieces of other people's perfect lives, and you wonder why things aren't as picturesque for you. But let’s face it, everyone’s just posting their highlight reels. The journey to quieting my deeply chattering brain is still a long one, but I've got a toolkit of positivity ready. I’m setting boundaries with myself and learning to trust both my gut and the other person involved. Have any of you ever found comfort in writing your worries down? Journaling seems to clear my mind a little, like letting out steam so the pot doesn’t explode. And music. God, music. A good song or two really lulls the inner critic into silence occasionally—just that moment of peace. Relationships are tricky; they require learning and unlearning. It’s always a work in progress, and I'm figuring out that maybe, just maybe, it’s okay not to have all the answers straight away. The whole "be yourself" mantra should come with an appendix, mentioning that yourself is okay in its most raw, unsure form. I wonder if the key is just finding someone who mirrors the same patience and understanding that I’m striving for within myself. And hey, if you're out there overthinking like me, remember that we’re all a little messy just doing our best. Keep your chin up. Life's too short, and I'd rather be imperfectly happy than drowned in perfectly analyzed doubts. Why let fear lead when courage might bring so much more joy around the corner? Is it possible we're all just works in progress, seeking that sweet spot of calm and love without unnecessary drama? Keep going; it gets better, and who knows, maybe we'll start mastering the art of not thinking so much.

ever had that feeling when you're just so anxious, like the world’s closing in, and then suddenly you're burning up with fever? so, i was just wondering if anxiety can actually cause a fever or if it’s all in my head. i'm 17 and honestly, the thought's been bugging me for a while now. whenever i have a big test coming up, or something stressful happens, i start feeling really hot. maybe it’s the nerves? i always thought fever was more about being sick, but it’s hard to ignore when you’re sweating buckets, right? it’s not like i’m shivering or anything, but i get so warm and it's all downhill from there; really messes with my focus and everything.

i asked some friends but they kinda just shrugged it off, saying everyone gets stressed sometimes. but like, isn’t there a point where your body's just like, "hey, take a chill pill"? i mean, isn’t it kind of ridiculous that my body reacts this way over school stuff? my mom thinks i’m just being dramatic, and maybe i am, but hey, a fever’s a fever, isn’t it? i’ve tried to keep cool, literally, like staying in air-conditioned rooms and stuff, but it doesn't always help. hmu if anyone else feels like their anxiety’s got a thermostat of its own, because i'd love to know if this is just a “me” problem or if it’s something more common. does anyone else get those anxiety sweats, or am i just out here dealing with my body on extreme mode? anyway, if i figure it out, i’ll definitely share what’s up. peace out!

When I was little, I often felt as though I was trying to tell myself something from the future. Sometimes, I would avoid doing a lot of work because I'd receive what I called a 'message from my future self' in my mind, almost instinctively. Without fully realizing it at the time, I'm now around 25, and I've come to understand that I handled certain things incorrectly. Because of this, I'm now trying to communicate with my younger self. However, it feels like a one-way message with no reply, as I can't get any feedback. Just a few minutes ago, I had one of these experiences, and it made me think that this isn't normal for most people.

Recently, these messages have become very strong. I have no idea what they precisely mean, but I believe my future self is trying to send them to me in bits and pieces. However, I struggle to understand them. Sometimes they become clearer in dreams, or when I'm daydreaming. Also, when I'm thinking less, the messages appear as written text or images. I don't know what's going on, but I'm definitely not crazy. I've considered talking to a therapist, but I view this as my secret. So, I just want to know if more people experience this, or if I'm just getting carried away by an idea. It feels as real as receiving a text on WhatsApp, but the downside is that when I receive these messages, I get disconnected from the real world, perhaps for a few seconds. I completely forget what's happening during that second, even if I'm in the middle of a conversation. Despite this, I'm so enthusiastic about the messages that I try to connect the dots and am still trying to figure out what they're about.

Before I had a minor accident, I consistently received warning-type messages in my mind. However, once the accident occurred, these messages stopped and never returned. Even though I was being careful, the minor accident still happened.

My dad has been struggling through some mental health issues for a while and we have been doing our best to support him (my mother and my siblings ). However my younger sibling caught my dad cheating yesterday night as he was calling and texting with another lady. My parents have been married for around 30 years. I feel like throwing up. My dad isn’t a bad father, we always looked up to him because of his strong personality but none of us can even look at him now anymore. He keeps apologizing and keeps saying that he did it because of his mental health issues but what kind of an excuse is that? He broke all of our trust, we never expected this from him. How does one even cope with this? All we have been doing is crying and feeling numb the entire day. I feel so bad for my mom, we can’t even leave as we are financially dependent on him.

What a nice father’s day I guess.

so here I am, lying in bed again. 31 years old, male, and feeling like there's this weight on my chest that I can't shake off. my wife, bless her, keeps telling me to do something, anything really, instead of just staring at the ceiling. i just don't know if it's depression, or maybe i'm just stuck in this rut that's swallowing me whole. it feels like I'm trapped in this cycle of inertia, where motivation is a foreign concept and every day blends into the next without much differentiation. i wonder if it's normal to feel like this at my age? am I supposed to have it all figured out by now, or is everyone just pretending they've got their lives in order? the truth is, all I want to do is stay under these covers where it's safe and predictable. getting out of bed feels like scaling mount Everest minus the accomplishment. everything seems so incredibly daunting and exhausting even before the day begins.

i'm aware that i should probably listen to my wife; everyone says communication and action are key, but how do you act when you can't even muster the strength to care? it's like the more I think about doing something productive, the more drained I feel. the thought of tackling even the simplest task is paralyzing, and it's terrifying because it makes me question my capability as an adult; am i alone in this feeling, or is this a phase everyone goes through? should I worry about being present for responsibilities outside this room, or is it okay to take some time to figure things out? it's not that i don't want to improve, it's more that i can't envision what improvement looks like right now. why does it feel like i'm constantly fighting a battle against myself, and losing horribly? sometimes it's hard to distinguish whether this is just a temporary funk or if it's the prelude to something more concerning. does it get better with time, or does it require a drastic intervention to change? emojis don't usually cut it, but right now, i just feel like this 😞.

Been imposing by everyone of being the strong one since day 1. Reality is not, but no space or chance to even show weakness. and surely a fvkn perfectionist.

so, i'm 23 and yeah, i have a driving license, but i just can't seem to get myself behind the wheel. it's like there's this invisible wall that i just can't break through. i know it's kinda silly, right? like, i went through all those driving lessons, spent all that time and money, and i can't even bring myself to drive. remember when you first got your license and felt all excited and free? well, let me tell ya, i didn't quite feel the same. the whole idea of controlling this huge hunk of metal freaks me out. it's a real bummer though 'cause not driving is kinda holding me back in other areas of life too. finding a job without being able to drive? that's like trying to catch fish without a fishing rod. you basically wave goodbye to any decent job that's not within walking distance or easily accessible by public transit.

i mean, i totally get it. people drive every day no biggie, right? but then my mind keeps running horror stories of accidents i've seen or heard about. cars skidding on icy roads, narrow misses, wild road rage. it just cranks up my anxiety sky-high. people often tell me, "oh, just go for a short drive, nothing to it!" but it's not that freaking easy, you know? sure, i've tried. there was this one time i managed to drive around the block. i was like, "whoa, look at me!" but then... panic city. palms sweaty, heart racing, you get the drift. i can't seem to break through it. do you ever feel like there's just this one thing that you can't get over no matter how much you try? sharing this in hopes someone out there gets it. maybe you had or have the same fear? i've heard of others overcoming it, so maybe there's still hope for me? any tips on getting over this scare would be super appreciated. thanks for hearing me out!

I’m 27 years old

I wish I could feel love again

The feeling of love is so beautiful

But sadly I no longer feel anything for anyone

I need to live a legendary love story that brings back my passion for life

What should I do

Especially that I don’t go out much

Ever wonder if anyone, and who would come looking, if you disappeared? I think no one would come looking for me.

I honestly hate myself so much. What I’m not changing I’m choosing right? And I hate even that too. I hate that I’m fat, my tooth is chipped. I’m not pretty. I’m unattractive in every aspect possible of a human. Even my personality is ugly. I haven’t dated in 7 years. No one found me good enough because I’m not good enough for anything. Even now nearing my 30s I’m still lost in life. It just seems like every day is a drag. Dragging along in life just hating everything and myself. I have no friends. I eat too much I drink too much. Everything just sucks. I’ve been getting a lot of rejection to the point where I feel like I’ll eventually just end up with someone below my league due to me being this hideous inside and out. I won’t be happy. Will I ever be happy? It seems I’ll end up alone at this rate. I try to tell myself there’s nothing wrong with that.. but will I be content with myself in the end of it all? Or will I crave for connections?

It is exactly as it sounds. I have a cat and a dog. I spotted fleas over two years ago. So we used spot on. Then they came back, so I used spot on and flea treatment. I have been doing this on and off for two FUCKING YEARS. I changed the treatment and they seemed to go. But I found them AGAIN!! One this morning on the cat. In retrospect, they scratched a lot between last sighting and now. So they never left. NEVER. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK!! I HAVE SPENT HUNDREDS ON THESE FUCKING PESTS AND THEY JUST WON'T DIE. I WANT TO BURN MY HOUSE DOWN. I WANT TO KILL MYSELF. I HATE THEM SO MUCH. I HATE THEM, I HATE MYSELF AND I JUST WANT TO DIE. FUCKING FOUL CREATURES!!!

I am fucking tired of your boring, grumpy cat pics. Its not even your own cat, its your friend's cat. Why are you sp high on ugly peice of grey fur. I actually liked your cat when I first saw her but you ruined it for me by constantly sending me cat pics and videos. I lie to you because instead of reflecting on your actions you block people and move over to the next one. I know why you get me gifts because without those incentives no one would actually want to be your friend. No wonder you have a problems in your marriage. I thoighyour husband sucks based on what I heard from you but after knowing your less than a year, I feel bad for him that he has to put up with your antics. You suck man. You suck big time. People leave you because you drain them emotionally. You are a not a bad person but you are exhausting. Your friends werent concerned when you got depressed. They kept checking on your because they couldnt really believe that you matured and stopped behaving like a teenager. I have seen your university stage performance and the second hand embarrassment I got... jesus. You not a performer. You are not a charm on the stage. Your poems are boring AF and recitating it only makes it worse. Stop it. Just sucking stop being so performative and thinking yourself as some sort of an entertainer. You are not and you need to care about the people around you and just fucking stop it. You are not an young adult who would roam around like crazy. You are in your 30s. GROW TF UP. You family vacation sucked, yk why? Because you suck. Your husband, sister amd cousins would like vacation like adults but you want to behave like 5 year old and they are sick of your antics.

Stop sending me ugly beach videos. I love beaches. Dont ruin it for me. I love waves. I want to go surfing when I can afford to vacay on a nice beach. Dont you fucking ruin it for me by trying to vc me showing waves. You voice, you mannerisms, I find everything to be annoying. Stop sending those edited clips (tf you adding a sad romantic song on a beach video?) and ugly edited photos. Why do you even edit? Why do you oive under the illusion that you are some sort of a creative genius. You are not. Please shrink yourself because you are suffocating everyone aaround you. No one, at least, people of your age needa a boring woman trying to be funny or the life of the party. You dont have that kind of charm. You are just embarrassing.

Hi my name is Zariah but I’d rather be called Luna..please I might be too young for this app at 11 years old but please don’t block me I have no one else to vent tok being to scared…I have loving parents and a loving grandmother who I live with..I have many friends and a trans partner but sadly they want to do suicide because of their abusive mother who tried to make them overdose…I know it’s selfish wanting to die when I have everything I need in life..but I just don’t want to live..I’m insecure about my skin..my personality…my selfishness…my body..I’m so hypersexual…I hate it..I hate everything about me..I want to die but I don’t…I just want a different life…I get judged a lot..I act crazy…I threaten people when I’m mad even tho I never mean it…I have almost 10 siblings 4 on my mothers side and 7 on my dads side I don’t want to leave my family but I don’t want to be with them neither…I want attention but I don’t want to be looked at…I want to be around people but I want to be alone…I feel pretty but I feel ugly…I feel touched and disgusting…I hate my body…I hate everything and everyone…but I still let everyone step on top of me just to satisfy them…I hate being beat up..but I love the pain…I did self harm too myself thinking it would help my grandmother understand how I feel..but she just made it worst by telling my dad and beating me up…calling me stupid and even trying to put me in a mental hospital…and honestly I want to be in a mental hospital…I want to be around people like me…crazy, insecure, weird, and stupid I want to jump but I’m too scared…I want to run away but where will I go? I feel like everyone hates me even tho they give me everything…I’m scared god is real so when I actually end up killing myself I got to hell…I want to cry but for some reason nothing will come out…I hate myself…but I love everyone else..?

hey there.... rn I feel so good lol , uk why .. okay first let me tell you that I'm a 21 years old female...and I am rn at just so calm... I feel nothing inside me... and nothing outside... not in a good or bad way..but idk why i feel like it's a temporary feeling of calm... or u can say I calmed myself through non stop dopamine hits lol ... and that's bcoz ... there's this guy online whom I talk to daily...and I feel like omg I'm so obsessed with him.. with his voice..with his questions...with his banters... with him teasing me indirectly through questions lol...ughhh why it feels so good lol....I'm really obsessed with him...like I continuously check for his texts lol ... like yesterday we talked for about whole night...and slept in the morning lol...I'm really more in comfort talking to him rather than having sleep of 7 hours lol... which I can take later...sorry world I don't wanna hear ur advices for my health...I already know it lol... but I love this feeling lol... no we're not bf gf... but we just love talking to each other so much ...it gives us so much peace in the whole day lol...and today lol he slept at 2 am... so I was like why lol...ik lol that it's wrong to think that...both of our sleeps are imp.....ahhhh but I already miss him so much lol....this feeling god....I feel a new calm inside me.... like I don't feel like talking to anybody else online... I don't feel like watching a movie or any entertaining content....but I do want to so something else lol.... but ngl he's always on my mind lol.. can't do anything...when I get his text or vm ... ahh that dopamine hit lol....

idc what the world says that I'm distracted or anything.... cuz I love this feeling even if it's temporary lol..I already know that ur gonna say I'm distracted.... but this introvert girl got so much open to him lol about her life....that now there's a new confidence inside me lol...I love our talks really...I always miss him... don't judge me lol.... but this is what I feel rn lol

And chill ik the stuff that ur gonna say that focus on urself... don't fall for this temporary dopamine hit... don't get distracted ...

But hey world listen I'm obsessed to him can't do anything rn lol... just love this feeling lol...