Life Stories and Everyday Drama - page 41

i had this weird dream back a month ago and a week or two ago i got another dream with them but for some reason i felt safe in a sense. to give background info, i participate in orchestra, and while i do love it, i genuinely do think singing is a better place for me, and something i can do 90% effortlessly despite being self-taught. the first dream, i was dreaming about my orchestra teacher and apparently in the dream, i was breaking into his home with my best friend for some reason. the house was supposedly greek-themed (keep in mind, i have no idea what the house looks like nor do i want to know), and it was nighttime. i don't know nor remember why i was "breaking into" his house during the dream, but all i remember was towards the end of the dream, i believe i was harshly scolded (or somewhat beaten) while they told my friend to just leave. i feel like some other background information i could give regarding them is that they're actually a very kind person, but they're also strict on proficiency as well, for good intent. however, i get constantly embarrassed to practice at home due to my sister's criticism (i feel like it was a bit harsh, but i got tired of it to the point i would start crying) so i just stopped and tried to squish in before being tested on it. they're always available to help, but i feel quite scared doing so in case i feel i may get scolded (in the unlikely event that that happens). i just want to know what that means because a week ago or two, i had another dream with them but their orchestra room looked a lot more different, mainly that the walls were a different color but i felt like i trusted them. it's not that i don't, but i feel scared to do so. but after that, i was driving this car that i couldn't stop the pedal on nor hit the brake and ended up having to stop it somehow at a dentist's office. but they were no longer there, just this random family where i was doing this trend and somehow the son of the family got the credit for it. i wasn't upset, but i wasn't particularly happy.

i also looked on reddit and quora for some advice to see what it could mean and one user said it means that i could be looking for answers. as much as i agree with it, i feel based off myself and my orchestra teacher, i feel i'm not really seeking answers more than i'm seeking trust from who i can and can't trust to avoid putting my deepest vulnerable life stories into the wrong hands who doesn't trust me (or vice versa) nor have any care for the confidentiality of the story. i can't bring myself to see my teachers as people who do care very much outside of teaching more than i just see them as a teacher because i was afraid to get close to anyone.

so what does my follow-up dream have to do with this?

what does this truly mean then, given the background info and my hurt?

I recently went on a trip to Europe with one of my best friends. I think the whole experience confirmed that I am meant to be alone. She was critical of everything. We only had a few weeks to plan the trip, but she did not bother to do any research. She asked me what my budget was and I told her about $2,000- she agreed. I tried booking hotels with that in mind. When we get there she starts complaining. First, she complains that it is cold. We went to UK in the middle of winter- so it was going to be cold. She knew this ahead of time. She also insisted on traveling outside the country. Then she complains about the hotel, I booked and said it was small. Then spends the whole time complaining about the cost of everything from food to public transport to shopping. It is one of the most expensive countries for a reason. When I go on vacation, I try to enjoy myself. This includes eating when I want to and thinking about my comfort. She would get upset about spending money on public transport, when we could walk. She also insisted on only having two meals/day to save money. She then confessed that her plan was only to spend $1000 on the whole trip. This pissed me off because she did not mention this before the trip. Then she goes on explaining how she does not have a lot of money to spend, since she just got married. She doesn't mention in this guilt trip, that this year she got married- had two weddings and has gone on multiple trips. She also then starts complaining that the hotel room is small and we could have gotten a better deal at a Hilton. Yeah- like we could afford a Hilton on her budget.

There were definitely fun moments throughout the trip. Yet often everything became about what she wanted to do. I started to feel guilty about the cost of everything. I also shut down when people get confrontational, thus I never pushed back when she started dictating what we do. For example, she is obsessed with creating perfect Instagram selfies. She isn't as bad as some influencers, but a majority of my time was spent being her personal photographer. She would ask, if I wanted a picture, however they were some of the worse photos I've ever seen. She asks for effort, but never reciprocates. My breaking point came when she made a big deal out of me taking the booth seat at a restaurant. She later stated that I always insist on doing that we should alternate who gets the booth. I only really had the booth once. I only sat there because my back was hurting because we walked to every souvenir shop in the city so she could find a deal on gloves, only to get mad when she was unable to barter down to her ideal price. At this point, I realized that we have maybe grown apart or at the very least have different travel styles.

I truly did not get upset until the final night. I was reading and she was on the phone with her husband. She told him how she wished he could have come with us--like wtf! She was the one who insisted on us going on this trip. She said it was "a girls trip." I even asked her, why she and her husband were not taking a trip together after the second wedding (they went on a honeymoon after the first wedding). He was busy with work and could not come. But apparently, she asked him to come with both of us on the UK trip. It just made me feel like a third wheel. This made me realize that friend has no respect for me or my time. I understand, her husband is her choice of travel partner; but in that moment I felt like I'm just the toss in character to her story. The worst part--I started believing it as well. That hurts!

Through this experience, I realized I needed to stand up for myself. I don't have many friends. I was scared of losing- what I thought to be-my only true friendship. I am shy and introverted and have no self-esteem. I also can be detached fueled by fear of rejection. I know these are all reasons it is hard for me to build relationships. I am also scared of being lonely. But, I deserve better than to be a side character in my own life.

In 6th grade I met this boy (J) he was shy but sweet, we were friends for a while that year but eventually in social studies I realized I liked him, alot. I told one of my (use to be) guy Friends in the form of a note they told J and he said he like me too so that's where it started. Today I still rember our first hug, first time holding hands, ect. we broke up a few times but we were children and did not know how relationships worked yet. we got back together in 7th grade and took it more serious and everyone loved us at the end of the year saying "Yall are the cutest couple" "I hope y'all last" "best couple of 7th grade" and I still agree with those still, we dated and of 7th grade (last year) over the summer and the start of 8th grade too! in till the week of Halloween in October. it was Monday, me and J had planed on going to the upcoming middelschool dance together but that morning before homeroom he told me he couldn't go because his dad said no due to low grades at not handed in work(NHIS) I'll be honest I wasn't alive that morning so my brain with not even alive but I was sad but said "okay" my goofy ADHD self remberd a time back I 6th grade befor J when I dated a guy (H) and we were supposed to go to that middle school dance but I wasn't feeling good that day due to hightend anxiety (I was diagnosed later on that yr) so me thinking back to 8th grade I was like hey what if I go with h to the dance?! (meant to mean that AS FRIENDS but I didn't get that out there.. terrible idea ik T^T) so in orchestra I have with H I said hey would u want to relive that dance we were supposed to go to in 6th grade (AS FRIENDS) he took that as cheating on J and asking him (H) out. well I heard later it got out to J that I "asked out" H and yeah now I know it seems like that. And befor I get yelled at I LOVEED J AND ONLY HIM I NEVER EVER THOUGHT OF H LIKE THAT (he was like a brother to meX_X) and in 4th peroid class changed I gave J our usual hug but he seemed hurt and upset. I had a gut feeling (TIME SKIP) later my friend messaged me telling that people said I'm cheating on J, at that moment ik I fliped up so instead of J finding out from rumors I messaged him telling him everything hoping to save our (8 almost 9 month relationship) I said if you want to say "goodbye" I understand completely and I am so sorry I did this to you (TIME SKIP) so we broke up he said its better to say goodbye so that happend and we both mentally felt like crap, and both our hearts were crushed.

that was in 2024 not its 2025 and about to be may aka the last month of school. j had a GF but she only saw him as a friend so that lasted a week and I've tried to move on and I just haven't felt the love thing people are supposed to do/have the only love I've ever felt for someone was with J and its still like that. now I don't like him like that anymore I just see him as a close friend and I know it wont be nothing more as I messed up. but you know after you felt/had something like that for so long or felt that way its like apart of you still holds on to them and their memories of you and them together. its like an invisible rope that keeps y'all connected. at a distance but United together and invisible. I just wonder if he or us could ever be a thing again, even if not the same but at least I still feel the hope. sometimes I wonder if its worth the try or risk. would I ruined it again, mess up our friendship which could be all we have left or try and we learn from our mistakes and heck can start our lives together because highschool is next year. or maybe I just seriously gotta let it go. what do y'all think? (also sorry its ALOT)

I'm starting to kind of dislike my mom. Yeah, I love her with all of my heart, but after she broke up with her most recent boyfriend, shes been acting a whole lot different. I know she smokes weed and drinks beer and all, but its still unsettling. She's been a lot more infuriable, she makes me sleep in her bed to help her anxiety despite the anxiety she gives ME, she won't even interact with my dog without yelling at her, she barely interacts with me OR my brother, only talking to me when she needs me to get a drink for her. This morning, she woke up yelling at us, forcing me to wear clothes that hadn't even went in the DIRECTION of the dryer, almost forgot to give me life-affecting medicine, etc. Screaming about how we embarrassed her, were in her own words "addicted fucks"(simply for even BREATHING in the direction of a phone), etc.

She's also been venting to us a whole lot more instead of seeing a professional. My brother and I are in our early teens.

I dunno, am I the asshole for being uncomfortable with her?

I never thought I would be the kind of person to even ask myself a question like this. When I got engaged to my fiancé three years ago, I was certain. Certain that he was the right choice, that we would build a life together, that the past was just that—the past. But lately, I find myself thinking about my ex more than I want to admit. It’s not that I don’t love my fiancé. I do. He’s kind, he’s supportive, he makes me laugh even when I’m stressed out of my mind. But no matter how hard I try, there’s still this small, stubborn part of my heart that belongs to someone else. And I don't know what that says about me.

Sometimes it hits me out of nowhere. Like when a song we used to listen to together comes on the radio. Or when I pass a certain coffee shop where we spent hours just talking about everything and nothing. And then all the memories come flooding back—the good ones, the ones that make my chest ache in that bittersweet way. I start wondering if he ever thinks about me too, if he ever misses those stupid inside jokes we had or the way we used to plan our future like it was some big adventure. It's confusing, because I don’t want to go back to that relationship. It ended for good reasons. We fought too much, we wanted different things, and in the end we hurt each other more than we helped. Still, part of me misses what we were before it all fell apart.

I’ve tried to tell myself that it’s normal. That maybe everyone who’s been in love before feels this way sometimes. That just because you move on doesn’t mean you erase the love you had. But deep down, it makes me feel guilty. Like I’m betraying my fiancé without even doing anything. He deserves all of me, not a part of me that’s stuck looking backward. And the worst part is, he’s done absolutely nothing wrong. He’s patient with me, he’s honest, he loves me in a way that feels safe and steady. Maybe that’s part of the problem. My relationship with my ex was never steady—it was chaotic and passionate and sometimes toxic. But it made me feel alive in a way that calm love doesn’t always manage. And I hate that part of me still craves that mess sometimes.

There are nights when I lie awake next to my fiancé and wonder if I’m making a mistake. If maybe the reason I cant let go of my ex is because some part of me believes he was “the one” and I just let him go because it got too hard. But then I remember all the pain, all the crying, all the days I felt like I was losing myself just trying to keep him. Loving him wasn’t healthy, even if it was intense. And isn't love supposed to be more than just fire? Isn’t it supposed to be peace too? I know that rationally, but my heart... my heart still hasn’t fully caught up sometimes.

Sometimes I wonder if it's just nostalgia lying to me. Making me remember only the good parts and forget all the nights I cried myself to sleep wondering why I wasn’t enough for him. Nostalgia is a liar like that, painting the past prettier than it really was. I try to remind myself of the facts, the way he would leave me hanging for days, the way he made promises he never kept. But emotions aren't logical, and memories are trickyy. No matter how many times I tell myself I’m better off now, there’s still that ache when I think of what could’ve been, what we almost had.

I haven’t talked to my ex in a long time. Part of me wants to reach out just to see if he’s okay, but I know that’s a bad idea. I know that opening that door would only bring more confusion and hurt. So I keep my distance, for my sake and for my fiancé's. He doesn’t deserve half my heart. He deserves all of it. And maybe loving someone doesn’t always mean you’re supposed to be with them. Maybe sometimes love stays even when the person doesn’t. I guess that’s the lesson I’m still learning.

So yeah, maybe it is normal to still love your ex a little. Maybe it’s just part of being human. Love doesn’t have an off switch. But the important thing is what you do with those feelings. I choose to honor my past without letting it control my future. I choose to stay, to grow, to love the man who’s standing in front of me, not the memory of the one who left. And maybe one day, that stubborn ache will fade into something softer, something that doesn't hurt so much. Until then, I’ll keep moving forward, even when my heart sometimes wants to look back.

me and him have been best friends for literally forever: we met when we were like 5 or 6 and we been inseparable since. everyone always joked that we were like brother and sister or whatever and i used to laugh so hard at that. but now? now it feels different. and i hate that it does cause i don’t wanna ruin what we have. i don't even kno when i started catchin feelings for real. maybe it was the way he always remembered the smallest stuff about me or how he’s the only one who actually listens when i talk about my dumb drama. or maybe it was just one of those things that slowly grows when you’re not even paying attention. but now it’s all i can think about, and it’s freaking me out so bad.

like sometimes i catch myself just starin at him when he’s laughing or when he’s talkin about something he loves and my heart just melts. and i’m like, "oh no, this is not good." and it’s not just like a little crush either. it’s real. deep. i care about him so much it actually hurts. and i start thinking stuff like, what if he never feels the same? what if he finds out and it makes everything weird between us? what if he just stops wanting to be around me cause he’s uncomfortable? i can’t even imagine my life without him, like he’s been there for every important thing that’s happened to me since i can remember. and now i’m just here, ruining everything in my own head because i caught stupid feelings.

we hang out all the time still, but it feels different for me now. like when he bumps into me or hugs me goodbye, i get all nervous inside, like butterflies exploding in my stomach. and i have to act normal, like "haha yeah bro" when really i wanna scream "I LOVE YOU!!!" 😭 and it’s the worst. sometimes i wonder if he feels anything too, like little signs maybe? but then i tell myself i’m probly just imagining stuff. like last weekend we were watchin a movie and he rested his head on my shoulder for like two seconds and i swear my brain broke. but he didn’t act weird about it so maybe it was just nothin to him. meanwhile i’m sittin there havin a whole emotional breakdown.

i’ve thought about tellin him. so many times. like just blurting it out and seein what happens. but i’m so scared. what if he doesn’t feel the same and everything changes? what if he stops being my person? i’m not just scared of rejection, i’m scared of losing him completely. he's the one i go to when my life sucks, when i’m happy, when i’m confused, when i just wanna chill. if i lose that, idk what i’ll do. and maybe it’s selfish but part of me would rather keep him as a friend than risk not having him at all. it’s like being stuck between two horrible choices and no matter what, it’s gonna hurt.

some days i tell myself maybe it’s better if he never knows. that i’ll just get over it eventually. maybe if i meet someone else or go to college and move away or somethin, the feelings will fade. but deep down i know it wont be that easy. he’s not just some random guy, he’s him. my best friend. the one who knows all my favorite songs, who remembers my birthday better than i do, who always texts me good luck before every big test. how do you just stop loving someone like that? i dont think you can. and honestly, i don’t even want to.

i wish i was braver. i wish i could just tell him everything and have it all work out like in movies. but this isn’t a movie. it’s real life. and real life is messy and scary. so for now, i’ll just keep being his best friend, keep loving him quietly, and hope that someday maybe... just maybe... he’ll look at me and feel it too. and if not... well, at least i’ll still have him in some way. and that’s better than not having him at all. right?

so today the girl I like (A) got a little fake rose from her girlfriend (B), as far as I know neither of them know I like A.

usually I can deal with being around B.

But when I saw B give A that rose...

it felt like someone shot me.

Why does love hurt so freaking much.

Atp I'd rather have a heart of freaking stone than be in love.

I'm currently running on two hours of sleep, and not per night. Literally I have gotten two hours of sleep in the past like four days.

I don't know why. I'm really freaking tired. But no matter what, I just can't sleep.

I can hardly keep my eyes open in class, but I can't go to sleep either; believe me, I've tried.

I just don't know what to do because I'm afraid that if i tell my parents or my doctor, they'll dismiss it as the sleep problems I've had since forever and yes it's probably those sleep problems and if it is they've gotten a LOT worse.

i don’t even know where to start honestly, everything just feels so confusing lately. me and my boyfriend been together for like 2 years now and it’s not like we been perfect, every couple fights sometimes right? but still, we always managed to work it out, always found our way back to eachother. until now. it’s like a switch flipped. he used to text me good morning every day without fail, he used to call me just to hear my voice, he used to actually listen when i talked about my day. and now... nothing. it started with little things, like takin longer to reply, cancellin plans last minute, saying he’s "busy" but not really explaining why. and i tried to be chill about it at first cuz i know people got stuff goin on, i didnt wanna be that clingy girlfriend always askin for attention. but it kept happening, and now it’s like i’m talking to a wall. sometimes i send him a message and he don’t even open it until hours later, sometimes not even til the next day. when i call, half the time he dont answer. when i do see him, he’s distracted, always on his phone or just... somewhere else in his head. i asked him straight up what’s goin on and he just says "i’m fine" or "i’m tired" like that explains everything. but it doesn’t. i’m not stupid, i can feel the distance between us growing and it’s killing me inside not knowing why.

it’s messin with my head real bad too, like i’m overthinking everything now. did i do something wrong? am i not enough anymore? is there someone else? i replay convos in my head, reread texts lookin for clues, but there’s nothing clear. just this awful silence. and the worst part is that i still love him so much. i still wanna fight for us but it’s hard when it feels like i’m the only one even tryin. i miss him so bad it hurts, i miss laughin together, the way he used to look at me like i was his whole world. now sometimes when he looks at me it’s like he’s lookin through me. nd i hate that i’m turning into this sad, desperate version of myself, always waitin for him to text, hopin he’ll finally act like he cares again. my friends tell me i deserve better, that i should just walk away, but it’s not that easy. he’s part of my life, part of my plans, part of my heart. and the idea of losing him, after everything we been through, feels like i’m losing a piece of myself too. but how long can i keep hangin on to someone who’s not even reaching back for me? how many more nights am i supposed to cry myself to sleep wonderin why my boyfriend ignores me like i don’t even matter anymore? i just want answers, i just want to know if we still have a chance or if i’m just clingin to memories of someone who’s already gone. i dont kno what to do, all i know is that this hurts more than i ever thought it would.

i been askin myself this like everyday lately, why don't i have friends? it’s not like i’m mean or rude or anything. i try to be nice to ppl, i smile when i walk past them, i even try to jump into conversations sometimes but it’s like nobody really notices me. everyone at school got their group, their ppl they laugh with, eat lunch with, hangout after classes and here i am, sittin by myself most days. sometimes i pretend like i’m busy on my phone or i’ll act like i’m studyin so it don’t look so sad but fr it hurts. i see kids i grew up with, ppl who used to come over my house when we were little, now act like i don’t even exist. and idk what changed. maybe it’s me. maybe i got boring or weird or somethin and nobody wanted to tell me.

i keep thinkin about what i’m doin wrong. maybe i dont dress cool enough, maybe i say dumb stuff without meanin to. or maybe i’m just not interesting. i dont have crazy stories to tell or a million tiktoks to share like other kids. i mostly just stay home, play video games, watch youtube. nd when i do try to talk, it’s like the convo just dies. like i don’t kno what to say to keep it goin. nd when i do get invited to stuff (which is like once in a blue moon) i get so nervous i end up makin an excuse not to go. like what if i go and it’s awkward? what if they laugh at me or just ignore me the whole time? it's easier to just stay home sometimes but then i’m just stuck wonderin why i’m alone again. it’s a stupid cycle and i hate it.

social media makes it worse too. everybody postin pics with their friends at parties, games, whatever. group selfies, funny videos, inside jokes i’m not part of. i try to not let it get to me but it does. it makes me feel like there’s somethin wrong with me. like im broken or somethin. nd the more lonely i feel, the harder it gets to even try anymore. some days i tell myself i dont need friends, like whatever i’m fine on my own. but then i'll hear ppl laughin in the hallway or see a group hangin out and it hits me all over again. humans are supposed to have people, right? nd i dont. not really. just me and my stupid thoughts tryna convince myself it’s not a big deal when deep down it is.

i dunno if it’ll always be like this. maybe when i get older i’ll meet ppl who get me. or maybe i gotta change somethin about myself first, i really don’t kno. all i kno is right now, it sucks. it’s like standing in the middle of a crowd screamin inside but nobody even looks your way. i wish makin friends was as easy as it looks in movies, like u just bump into someone and boom, besties for life. but in real life, it’s messy and hard and sometimes it don’t happen at all. nd im just tryin to hold on to hope that maybe, just maybe, there’s ppl out there who’d wanna know me too. i just gotta find em. someday. i hope.

any advices guys???

Ive thought about her a lot lately. I wonder where she is and I hope she’s happier now. But I just have so many regrets, why didn’t I try to contact her the year after she moved? We were so close, I had known her since kindergarten but I just wanted to act like I didn’t care. And maybe thats the problem, we’re all trying to act like we dont care and that nothing bothers us. Maybe thats why she did what she did, and maybe if someone showed her they cared she could be enjoying the life she deserved. Why can’t we just show the people around us we care. I miss you I really do. How can I ever really live happily when I know I didn't help her at all and now she's gone?

We have been married almost 30 years

I feel like I took too much too long

I have worked full time as my husband did, we raised a daughter, I did most of it, he barely changed her diaper, never woke up at night when she was little

I deal with all BS by his mother, and I was a selfish DILwhen I tried to set a boundary w her.

He has full on ADHD, when I come home after working 7 am to 5:30 pm, the house is a mess, I run like a crazy woman to tidy up the house to the level that is barely acceptable as a living environment. I obviously contribute our house purchase 50% from out joint bank account, but I can not enjoy the house because it is so cluttered, looks like a dump inside-out all the time. The yard was beautiful when we purchased the house, now it looks like a junk yard. Things are placed so randomly, if I mention about it, he would say something like he is trying to don't look at them. But he refuses to get a house keeper because “I don't want a stranger in our house” or “I don't trust those people.”

I deal with his MIL living in our backyard house, and I am 100% sure she has bipolar personality disorder but my husband try to satisfy her like a little boy try to please mother who never satisfy. She acts like a princess while she is 88yo. Just hard to watch. He sacrifices everything including his job, his health, sanity, and his family. The relationships between him, I, and our daughter are non-existing because he devote his everything to take care of his parents. We have not had family time for years.

How is this ok, I am taking way too much, feels like I am done with being a good person because everybody is taking an advantage over me

How do I get help when all the doctors/ nurses and that don’t help or understand me and what I feel and need for myself my mental health and it’s driving me mad and my anxiety and depression is driving me mad

I’m 14 and my dad pays a lot of money for my counsellor after he realised I was cutting myself last year (I mostly let him know as I’d been doing it a while without him noticing). I feel really guilty because I’ve been seeing her for a while and I still feel the same, which is a constant sick, sad kind of feeing, and I plan to die as soon as I’ve moved away. I felt so guilty that I’ve been lying to her and my dad about feeling better, and now it’s gotten too a point where I’m too embarrassed and ashamed to confess that I’m still feeling this way. How do I tell my counsellor that I still feel bad? I don’t know if this website is appropriate for this but I don’t have any real people who I can ask right now and I feel the urge to cut.

Ive been thinking a lot of this lately. ever since matric, and uni, I've been so loaded with my procrastination, slow working pace, and poor time management; I felt I was constantly behind and even it's an endless cycle. because of that stress, I was always in my room, glued to one spot fighting myself and fighting with time, motivation and discipline to study (I still am); and I hardly went out of my room, I hardly spent any time with my family, hardly spoke, you know how it goes.

now its long days at uni and endless work and assignments, and nothing has changed since matric. I don't get how I procrastinate so much. I've tried everything - changed study spaces, tried different methods, deleted all social media applications, used timers, read motivational phrases, etc etc. I just can't seem to study and maintain the concentration, the ethic, the discipline. and because of this, I feel like every other time I spend out of my room, my study space, is time wasted and Im running short and I can't stay out here and waste time. I literally don't have any responsibilities around the house, and I feel guilty but also grateful to my parents for being so ..you know. everytime I do go visit my grandmother, who stays right next to our house, she tells me oh I don't even see you anymore. you always so busy. but i die with guilt that they think I'm sitting and hustling and grinding away, when I'm actually studying for 10 mins and the other 4 hours eg, are distractions.

another thing, my siblings hardly see me. I don't see myself playing any role as a sibling, and I'm afraid that they'll lose that already weak connection with me. I come home so tired and stressed that I don't connect, speak, laugh with him. I hate to admit but I don't want them to go out and spend long enough time with another person my age and compare me to that person, saying they wish they had a sibling like that person. I know I'm not enough, I'm not doing enough for them to be close to me to miss my presence. if I'm not there, they've already gotten so used to it, like it doesn't affect me. like they didn't even think about me, forget missing me. and I know my siblings so its about "maybe that's what I think but they could be missing and not saying". I know them. I don't want that me not being there is not even acknowledged. I want tthem to feel my absence, the slight emptiness. and the worst part is I wasn't like this- distant, disconnected with them, obviously.

I'm genuinely really struggling. please help me.